


Fixing Mistakes (Baby Niall)

by Connorperry42



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Baby Niall, Diapers, Infantalism, Niall-centric, Pacifiers, Spanking, non-con infantalism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-21
Updated: 2015-07-25
Packaged: 2018-03-14 00:47:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 41
Words: 85,586
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3402290
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Connorperry42/pseuds/Connorperry42
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Niall was having a hard time so the boys made him their baby however the stress from touring gets to them and they forget what they've done. Now that things are cooling down how will they make it up to Niall.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Niall's Life

Niall sat in the back of the top floor of the tour bus, curled up in a ball in the corner listening to his music and looking out the window. He had been here for the past four hours and was well aware that he would be here for the rest of the night. It was no big deal anymore, he was used to it.

Niall ignored his wet nappy having had to sit in it for the past five hours and knowing that none of the boys would do anything about it and he wasn’t allowed to change it himself. He had held out for as long as he could but at some point a guy just had to go. He also knew that having to sit in it all night wouldn’t do anything to help his rash.

An hour later and Niall heard all of the boys leave the bus. They’d forgotten him again; well that was nothing new. Sighing he stood up and went to his bunk to grab a change of clothes and then headed into the bathroom.

Niall wasn’t allowed to use the shower or the tub but he was allowed to use the sink so he stripped down to just his nappy – wishing that he was allowed to change it but not wanting to risk the punishment that would come if he were caught – and bathed himself in the sink with a bar of soap, even washing his hair before drying off and putting on his fresh clothes.

Once he was clean Niall took a quick drink from the sink, put his dirty clothes in the hamper and then went back to his usual corner.

It sucked, this life but still, he couldn’t do anything to change it and it was better than some.

 

One month before the new tour started and the boys noticed that Niall was having issues. The poor lad was stressed, he would wet the bed, he wouldn’t eat right, he would go out at all hours doing who knows what sometimes coming in piss drunk other times coming in completely sober but with various cuts and bruises. The lads had decided that they needed to help Niall since he wasn’t doing it for himself. They started Niall in age play.

At first it wasn’t all that bad. Sure Niall despised the nappies and the cot and the highchair but he did like all the attention. Niall had actually started to trust the boys to take care of him and had relaxed a bit.

Everything changed when the tour started though. It wasn’t Niall that changed; it was all the other lads. Touring came with a serious amount of pressure and the lads always had a hard time dealing with it at first which was ironic because it was the one time that Niall was actually relaxed or at least not as self destructive.

The boys had laid out the rules for Niall at the start. The middle row of bunks had been changed into a cot (the boys had their system, if the bars were up Niall was in there, if the bars were down Niall wasn’t) and Niall wasn’t allowed to let himself out. Niall wasn’t allowed to use the shower or the tub, Niall wasn’t allowed to remove his nappy, Niall wasn’t allowed in the kitchen unsupervised (the boys had gotten a highchair that strapped to the bench but they had yet to put it up) Niall wasn’t allowed to watch unapproved TV shows or movies, Niall wasn’t allowed out of the bus on his own

At first the boys had just been a little neglectful, forgetting a meal here or a bath there. Niall would ask them to change him and they’d be irritated at the interruption so Niall stopped asking. Niall would be hungry and ask for food and they would become irritated so Niall stopped asking. Niall would be thirsty and ask for a drink the boys would become irritated so Niall stopped asking. Niall would be bored and ask to watch a movie and the boys would become irritated so Niall stopped asking.

By the third morning the boys had the morning off and had forgotten to let Niall out of his cot. Niall had waited four hours before climbing out himself. Harry had caught him and spanked him for it not listening to the reason (the boys had left the bus and hadn’t heard Niall calling for them having just returned ten minutes prior).

By the end of the first week Niall had given up on the boys all together. He was typically changed once a day, twice if he was lucky. Niall had learned how to wash himself without breaking the rules, as well as getting a drink without going into the kitchen or using a cup. Instead of asking the boys for entertainment Niall just pulled out his i-pod (he wasn’t allowed a phone) and listened to music silently. At first Niall would sit in the main room on the bus where everyone sat but he was thrown out far too often because they boys wanted their privacy. Eventually he was thrown out of every room but the storage room at the back of the top half of the bus. Niall had claimed that room for himself. He hid in the far corner, behind the stored items curled up with his knees to his chest and his headphones firmly planted in his ears.

Niall had long since given up hope that any of the boys would get him at night so that he could sleep on a bed. Niall wasn’t allowed to sleep on any of the other beds on the bus and he definitely wasn’t going to climb into his cot on his own.

The boys tended to make sure that Niall was where he needed to be (Niall had a watch and would insure that he was by the front door of the bus when they needed to leave). One of the boys would grab his hand and drag him towards the desired destination. They changed him once a day. They brought him to the bus at the end of the days activities and then they forgot about him.

The boys didn’t forget Niall on purpose, they weren’t completely used to having a baby and they were all stressed from being on tour. Niall was quiet and invisible, easy to forget about.

 

Niall ended up sleeping in his corner most nights while the boys went out and then stumbled in at some random time all thinking that the other had taken care of Niall and none bothering to ask.


	2. Starting to Pay Attention

After a month and a half of touring the boys had all finally calmed down. They had finished their last show in the current country the previous night and they had two days to relax before they would be spending four days driving to their next location. After having a good night’s sleep they were all calm and relaxed and excited for their day. Harry and Louis were the first up and out the door excited to do some sight seeing and assuming that Niall, Liam and Zayn were all asleep.

Niall was the next up. He stood up out of his ball and stretched. Sleeping on the ground sucked. Sighing as he realized that he’d forgotten to clean himself the night before he set his headphones aside and went to gather some clothing.

As Niall was gathering items from his suitcase Liam slipped out of the bathroom. “Morning Nialler. Who let you out?” Liam asked.

Niall grabbed his things and stood up to look at Liam. He hadn’t expected to run into anyone this morning seeing as how it was their day off and he thought that the boys would all be out sight seeing.

“Niall?” Liam asked a little confused at the boy’s silence. Niall was always so lively and seeing this quiet boy now was a bit disconcerting. “What you got there?” he asked trying to switch topics.

Niall stayed silent though handing Liam what he had pulled out of his suitcase.

Liam raised an eyebrow at the continued silence but took the offering none the less. “Clothes huh? Did you get a bath last night?”

Niall shook his head in the negative. In truth he hadn’t had a bath in over a month.

“Right well” Liam said, “Let’s get going then”

Liam held out his hand to Niall who took it and let himself be dragged into the bathroom. Liam sat Niall on the toilet and started filling the tub before turning back to Niall, “Lets get you undressed then”

Niall stayed silent and compliant as Liam took off his clothes and then laid him on the ground. “How long ago did you use your nappy love?” Liam asked noticing that it was rather wet.

Niall just shrugged and stared up at the ceiling. He had used this nappy twice since it had been put on him and when hearing that he’d be bathed Niall had also messed it since he wouldn’t have to sit in it for very long. It was rare that he messed a nappy anymore for two reasons: 1) he didn’t know when he’d be changed and didn’t want to have to sit in it, and 2) he didn’t eat that much anymore thus leading to little waste as a byproduct.

“Oh baby” Liam said as he got a good look at the red, angry rash that covered Niall’s lower half, “Why didn’t you say something?”

Niall just shrugged again and waited patiently as Liam cleaned him up and then put him in the tub.

Liam put a rubber duck in the tub with Niall and started to wash his hair. He kept up a steady stream of dialogue with the boy hoping that Niall would respond to something but Niall just sat there silently, compliant but otherwise still. Once he was clean Liam lifted Niall out of the tub and rubbed a generous amount of cream all over the baby’s rash.

Niall let out a small whimper as Liam applied the cream and a couple of tears escaped his eyes but otherwise he was as emotionless as always.

“All done” Liam chirped once Niall was fully dressed, “I bet that feels better doesn’t it love?”

Niall just blinked and then stood up and headed out of the bathroom.

“Where are you going love?” Liam asked. Once again Niall was silent so Liam just sighed and grabbed Niall’s hand turning him towards the stairs, “It’s breakfast time”

When Niall was brought into the kitchen he was actually somewhat happy. So far today had gone a lot better than he’d hoped. He’d been bathed! He’d not only had his nappy changed but cream put on the rash too! And now Liam was going to give him food! Really this was better than any day on the tour so far.

Liam placed Niall on the bench as he started fixing pancakes. He knew that Niall loved pancakes and was hoping that Niall might actually say something. The boy’s continued silence was really starting to worry Liam.

“Morning” Zayn greeted coming into the room. “And how’s my baby boy today?” he asked upon seeing Niall.

Niall just looked up at Zayn, blinked and then looked back down at the table.

Zayn shot Liam a confused look but Liam just shrugged, he had no idea what was going on with Niall either.

Zayn set the table and ten sat at the bench with Niall while Liam cooked. Zayn continued to talk, hoping to get the silent boy to say something or at least to react to something but Niall stayed unnaturally still.

“Food’s up” Liam called happily as he placed a plate with two pancakes on it in front of Niall.

Niall didn’t even wait for any toppings to be added or silverware he just grabbed the food and stared stuffing it in his mouth unsure when he’d get the chance to eat again or if he would even be allowed to keep this food if he left it there too long.

Zayn and Liam stopped and stared at Niall as he ate. The kid was hunched over his plate, guarding it, as he ate like a starved animal. The two ‘adults’ looked up at each other concerned. What had happened to their baby?

Niall finished his food quickly then sat back waiting to leave for a moment. It felt so good to have food in his stomach.

“You OK love?” Zayn asked Niall once the kid was done.

Niall looked over to Zayn and blinked before looking away again.

Zayn and Liam were really starting to worry. Niall just wasn’t acting like himself; he wasn’t even showing emotion.

When they received no response Zayn and Liam decided to finish their food quickly and prepare a bottle for Niall knowing the lad had to be thirsty. Niall however waited until Zayn and Liam got up before leaving the room himself and heading back upstairs. Niall was thirsty so he headed straight for the upstairs bathroom sink.

Liam finished the bottle and then turned back to the bench expecting to see Niall waiting there patiently. He didn’t, “Where’s Niall?”

Zayn jerked around from where he was washing the dishes, “He was just there”

Both Zayn and Liam started searching the bus, Zayn downstairs and Liam upstairs. Liam noticed the sound of the sink running in the bathroom upstairs so he tried there first.

When Liam looked into the bathroom he was shocked by what he saw, Niall had his head bent over the sink, drinking the water as it flowed out of the faucet. “Niall?” he asked opening the door some.

Niall quickly jerked his head up and turned off the sink. As far as he knew he hadn’t broken any rules so there was no reason for him to be punished but still. If the boys forbid him from drinking from the sink he’d have no way to get water and a majority of what he consumed now a days came from this very sink.

Liam felt sick, why was Niall drinking from the sink rather than asking him for a drink? Niall looked nervous at being caught but Liam didn’t have the heart to scold him, “I have your bottle ready,” he said coming into the bathroom and picking Niall up. Liam had to take a second to realize that Niall was a lot lighter than he used to be; when did that happen?

“There you are!” Zayn exclaimed happily as he saw Liam come down the stairs with Niall in his arms.

“Found him in the bathroom” Liam said.

Zayn shot Liam a confused look but Liam shushed him and went to get Niall’s bottle from the kitchen.

Liam deposited Niall on Zayn’s lap and then handed over the bottle of warm milk. Zayn positioned Niall also taking in how light the boy was before bringing the bottle up to Niall’s mouth.

Niall latched onto the bottle greedily. He hadn’t had a bottle, or anything to drink other than water, in well over a month and it was a refreshing change. As he continued to drink his eyes grew heavy. He was clean, he had a fresh nappy on, he had cream on his rash, he had a full stomach and now he was laid out on Zayn who proved to be much more warm and comfortable than the hard floor of his corner. It didn’t take long before Niall was out like a light.

Zayn smiled down at Niall when he noticed the boy was asleep. Niall looked so cute when he was sleeping. Zayn set the bottle aside then carried Niall up to his cot surprised to see that the railing was still up. “How did you get out little man?” Zayn whispered to himself as he opened the cot and tucked Niall in. “Sleep well baby”

 

Zayn shut the cot and then headed down to find Liam. “What the hell has happened to Niall?”


	3. Realizing the Mistake

Liam sighed and turned to Zayn. “I don’t know.”

The two sat and discussed the events of the morning and what their concerns were both trying to find a way to blame the other rather than look at themselves as the possible cause for Niall’s mood change.

Eventually they realized that neither one of them had been taking proper care of Niall. Neither one of them could remember the last time they’d bathed the boy or fed him a bottle or put him to bed. They could remember occasionally changing his nappy but otherwise that was it. Both felt absolutely horrible and just to check they also called Harry and Louis to see if either of them had been taking care of Niall. They hadn’t.

To say that the four boys felt horrible would be a drastic understatement. They had forced Niall into age play and yet they had completely ignored their baby, left the poor lad to suffer.

All the boys knew that Niall had suffered throughout his childhood. Up until the age of ten he was abused by his mother and ignored by his father and older brother. Once Niall and his brother went to live with their father full time Niall had been moved into the backyard shed and left to fend for himself. By the time Niall came on the x-factor he had been completely disowned by his entire family and had nowhere else to go. If the x-factor hadn’t worked out for him he would have been living on the streets.

One of the reasons the boys had wanted to do age play with Niall was because they thought the boy deserved a proper childhood and then they went and repeated the same mistakes that his father had. They’d screwed up – badly.

Harry and Louis came back later that day loaded down with gifts for Niall. They had felt bad so they overdid it a bit.

“What all did you get?” Liam asked as the two came in loaded down with bags.

“Uh…” Harry paused to think it through while Louis started unloading. “We got a case of rash cream – I figured we could keep nappies and cream everywhere so that Niall can be changed immediately. Don’t want his rash getting any worse. Also we got him some dummies thinking he might like it and a teddy. We got him some Legos and some wood trains. Also we got every single Disney movie we could find since we left all ours at home. Also we got him a blanket and a few other stuffed toys and some blocks and some soft balls to play with and …”

“Over do it a bit?” Zayn teased.

“We’ve ignored him for over a month!” Harry exclaimed.

“Yeah” Liam sighed.

 

All the boys fell silent here, they knew that they had screwed up and they couldn’t change the past only try to fix things now. They needed to let Niall know that he was loved and wanted.


	4. Issues With Supper

Niall started to stir. Whatever he was laying on was really soft and he was warm. He rolled over figuring he was just dreaming of his bed and knowing he needed to get off the floor. Niall rolled into something solid however, which caused him to open his eyes curiously. Slowly Niall’s memory of the day came back and he groaned as he realized he was in his cot.

Niall decided to go ahead and make his bed since he was there, ever the anal retentive that he was. He knew that he would be stuck in his cot for a while and he wasn’t going to risk climbing out again the last thing he wanted was a spanking especially with his rash.

Sitting back, Niall resigned himself to a long boring wait. He just wished that he didn’t have to go to the bathroom. He’d be able to hold it for another hour or so but he had to go eventually.

Liam had been checking on Niall every thirty minutes to see if he was up or if he needed his nappy changed. He strolled down the aisle and saw the top of a blond head sticking up through the bars of the cot. “Well someone’s up” he smiled.

Niall jerked his head around; he hadn’t expected any of the boys to come get him for a while.

“Hey buddy, have a nice nap?” Liam asked though he knew full well that Niall wasn’t going to say anything.

Liam lowered the side of the cot and lifted Niall out, “Your nappy wet bud?” he lowered his hand to check but once again found it completely dry. It worried him a bit, Niall had been asleep for over four hours and he still hadn’t wet his nappy.

Liam smiled as he carried Niall down the stairs to the kitchen, “Hope your hungry baby, we got Nandos for supper”

Liam lowered Niall into the bench highchair that the boys had put up while Niall was napping. Zayn stepped up and strapped Niall in and put the tray in front of him before taking his own seat.

Niall didn’t like the restraints, they were pushing against his bladder and he was really trying to keep it in. Who knows when he’d be changed again?

“Hey baby boy” Louis greeted coming over and ruffled Niall’s hair as he also took a seat.

“Hope you’re hungry bud” Harry said placing a plate of Niall’s favorite on the tray in front of him.

Niall looked up at each one of them once, to be polite, and then looked back down at his tray. Granted he hadn’t eaten since breakfast but he really wasn’t hungry. Over the course of the past month and a half Niall was lucky to get three meals a week and now he was expected to eat two in one day. His stomach had shrunk greatly and the two pancakes and bottle this morning were enough to fill him for quite some time especially since he hadn’t been doing much of anything today. So instead of eating ravenously as he had earlier Niall just pushed the plate of food away.

All the boys looked up as Niall moved his plate away. They were surprised, honestly all the boys thought that it would be the easiest thing they did, getting Niall to eat.

“Ni, love, aren’t you hungry?” Liam asked concerned.

Niall just looked up at Liam and blinked before looking down.

Liam sighed, that seemed to be Niall’s go to response to everything now. “You need to eat” he said pushing the plate back in front of Niall.

Niall just pushed the plate away again and put his head down. A small whimper as the straps pushed down on his bladder even more.

Naturally the smallest whimper from Niall brought about all of the boys’ attention. “Are you alright love?” Liam asked. Liam was thinking that Niall wasn’t feeling well; he was whimpering, holding his stomach and refusing to eat.

Niall ignored the questioning from the boys as he tried really hard to stop his bladder. It was always painful to hold it in towards the last hour or two. When he was busy he didn’t have the luxury of holding it in during the last bit he just went. When he was stuck on the bus however he would hold it in for as long as possible knowing that it would be a very long time before he was changed and that he couldn’t afford for his rash to get any worse.

“I don’t think he’s feeling well Li” Louis whispered quietly as the boys watched Niall.

Liam sighed, “Zayn would you grab the thermometer, Harry can you fix him a bottle of water to settle his stomach”

Both boys got up to get as asked while Liam took Niall out of his highchair. Niall whimpered slightly as Liam propped Niall up on his hip as Niall’s bladder was once again jostled.

Liam carried Niall into the sitting room and sat down with the boy on his lap, “Ni, baby, are you feeling alright?” he asked as he laid a hand on Niall’s forehead.

Niall shook his head yes but he was still clutching his stomach so it didn’t hold much weight in Liam’s eyes.

Liam sighed as he saw Zayn come in with the thermometer and the gel. “Love, I’m going to check your temperature OK” he said as he started to lay Niall over his lap and accepted the items held out by Zayn.

Niall knew what kind of thermometer Liam was planning on using and he really didn’t want that but he also didn’t have much of a say in the matter. He had told Liam that he wasn’t feeling ill but Liam wasn’t listening, no one ever did.

The position Niall found himself in pressed his bladder even more and what with the anxiousness of the thermometer Niall couldn’t hold it any longer. Liam was about to undo Niall’s nappy when he suddenly felt it growing heavy against his leg and suddenly it made sense, “Oh love why didn’t you just go? Why hold it in?”

“What?” Zayn asked confused.

Liam handed the supplies back to Zayn and set Niall upright, “Holding it in isn’t healthy baby,” he scolded lightly.

“He had to pee?” Zayn asked.

Liam smirked sadly, “Yeah”

Liam handed Niall to Zayn as he laid out a changing mat and pulled out the needed supplies. When Liam was ready Zayn laid Niall out on the mat and assisted Liam in changing him.

Niall was relieved that he didn’t have to have his temperature taken and he felt so much better after having finally gone. He was elated to have his nappy changed immediately and not only that but more cream was applied to his aching rash. Most interestingly was that he felt as though he could eat a small bit.


	5. Movie Night

So I have a few more parts written but I would love to hear your opinions or ideas. Any feedback helps. Thanks.

____________________________

Niall ate about a quarter of his food before pushing the plate away again as he was full.

All the boy’s looked up as Niall pushed his plate away again. Harry went to say something but Liam shushed him silently. Liam had a feeling he knew why Niall wasn’t so hungry and they only had themselves to blame for it.

Everyone finished eating shortly and Louis cleaned up the table as Harry took Niall and a bottle of juice and took both to the couch in the TV room. “Here baby” Harry said as he sat down with Niall in his lap and handed the boy his bottle.

Niall took the bottle from Harry, drank a little of it before handing it back and then sliding off of Harry’s lap. Niall was surprised that he had been given a bottle but then today had been full of surprises however he knew that as soon as all the boys were done cleaning the kitchen they would all be heading back here. When all the boys settled into the couches they would find something to watch or do that was ‘inappropriate’ for Niall and kick him out. Niall was just going to avoid the inevitable and head up to his corner now.

Liam and Louis stopped in the hall when they saw Niall heading their way, “Where are you off to?” Louis asked curiously.

Niall didn’t respond, he just moved towards the stairs. Louis and Harry both went to intercept but Liam held them back. None of the boys had seen much of Niall since the tour started but Niall had been on the bus leading Liam to wonder where it was that Niall had been hanging out.

The boys all hung back as Niall went to his hideaway and Liam explained why he didn’t want to stop Niall immediately. Niall made his way straight to his corner and put on his headphones fully ready to immerse himself in his music. If Niall were honest, while all this attention from the boys today had been nice and he felt a lot better than he had in days he still wanted a break. Niall had been left on his own for over a month now and he was used to his alone time, being around the boys as much as he had today was already grating on his nerves and he just needed time to clear his head. Sighing, Niall was about to pull out his notebook (he’d been drawing for years now only he’d wasn’t one to show off his work so no one knew about it not even the boys) but froze when the door opened.

“Niall?” Zayn called as he came into the room. The boys had been searching the upstairs looking for Niall after they had let the boy find his hide away. The storage room was the last place they had to check so Niall had to be in here.

“Did you find him?” Louis asked coming into the room.

“Not yet” Zayn shook his head.

“He has to be in here, this is the last place,” Harry said joining the search.

Niall looked up as a shadow was cast over him, “Found him” Liam called as he reached down and picked Niall up, “Hey there baby” he smiled.

Niall didn’t understand, why had the boys come looking for him? The boys were the ones who kicked Niall out of the rest of the bus why were they suddenly looking for him now?

Niall was carried back down to the TV room and placed on Liam’s lap while the rest of the boys surrounded him.

“So, what would you like to do this evening?” Harry asked happily, smiling at Niall.

Niall just blinked in response as he tried to figure this out. Why did the boys care what he wanted to do? He had been sitting in his corner about to start drawing, that’s what he wanted to do and they wouldn’t let him.

“We’ve got all sorts of things for you to do” Louis said trying to coax Niall into doing something other than sit there. “We have trains and Legos. There’s balls, stuffed animals, and movies”

Again Niall was silent. He didn’t know what the boys wanted to do and he wasn’t about to suggest anything. His dad had played that game once, ask Niall what he wanted to do and then take that item and destroy it. Niall didn’t think that the boys would do such a thing but he also didn’t think that the boys would forget about him either so what did he know.

Zayn sighed as it was obvious Niall wasn’t about to give them an answer. Really none of them had expected Niall to say anything but they had hoped that the boy would give some sort of indication as to what he wanted. “How about a nice bath and then a movie before an early night in?” he suggested.

“That sounds wonderful, doesn’t it baby?” Liam asked Niall as he bounced him a little on his knee.

Niall sat quietly not really knowing what was going on or what to expect. He was carried upstairs and put into a warm tub. The boys paying attention to him was nice but he knew it wouldn’t last; it never lasted. Eventually the boys would forget about him; everyone forgot about him.

Niall did want to believe that the boys really cared for him, he had at one point, but now he just couldn’t. Sighing, Niall realized that while yes this was nice but it would never last and there was no point coming to expect it. He would go along with the boys for now but he wouldn’t attach himself to them again, the only person he could ever rely on was himself.

Liam had given his full attention to Niall when the boy had sighed, hoping that Niall might actually say something but Niall just looked lost in thought. Liam really hoped that Niall would forgive them quickly but he also knew that with Niall’s past they all had a long way to go in making it up to the boy.

“I’m sorry Ni” Liam said as he washed the boy’s back, “I never meant to ignore you and I promise that I never will again. I will always pay attention to you and I won’t let things get like this ever again”

Niall remained silent as Liam talked. The words were nice and he was surprised to receive an actual apology but still, could he trust it?

Liam finished with the bath and got Niall into a new nappy and a footed onesie. “All clean” he said as he picked Niall up and carried him downstairs to the TV room.

“So what movie do we want to watch?” Zayn asked coming over with about twenty of the DVD’s that Harry and Louis had picked up.

Niall sat silently staring at the floor refusing to pick anything. He had already tried getting off of Liam’s lap and going back up to his corner but Liam had a strong grip on his waste.

“How about we start from the beginning” Harry offered coming in and handing a bottle of warm milk to Liam who thanked him silently.

“So Snow White was the first movie Disney ever made” Louis said taking the disc from Zayn and popping it into the DVD player.

Liam kept Niall on his lap as the movie played despite the boy’s attempts to get away and go back to his corner. Harry said to the left of Liam with Louis on the other side of him the two curled together and Zayn sat to the right of Liam and curled into him and Niall.

As the movie reached the halfway mark Liam and Zayn readjusted Niall so that he was laid across both of them and Liam brought the bottle up to Niall expecting the boy to latch on as he had earlier.

Niall looked at the bottle being offered him. He didn’t want it; he wasn’t hungry. Niall had consumed more today than he usually did in a week and he just didn’t have any interest in the bottle. Deciding that he didn’t want the bottle Niall just turned his head away and back towards the TV.

Liam had wondered about this. He knew that none of them had been feeding Niall on a regular basis and they had also made it a rule that Niall wasn’t allowed to get food on his own (in hindsight that was a stupid rule). If the boys hadn’t been giving Niall food and Niall hadn’t wanted to break the rules so he hadn’t feed himself then Niall probably wasn’t used to so much food. Still though, Niall needed to gain weight – badly – and the bottles were important. “Niall, you need to drink as much as you can love”

Niall looked back to Liam and sighed, he really didn’t want it.

“Sorry baby, it’s really not up to you” Zayn cut in.

Reluctantly Niall started drinking the milk, it was good but he just wasn’t hungry. After taking maybe three sips he pushed the bottle away and returned his attention to the movie.

Liam sighed but knew that Niall had tried. It wasn’t Niall’s fault that he wasn’t hungry it was there’s. “OK baby” he said as he laid Niall out completely between he and Zayn. Liam started to run his fingers through Niall’s hair hoping that he could lull Niall to sleep, the boy needed to catch up on it desperately.

Liam had guessed that since no one had been putting Niall to bed at night that the boy had been sleeping in the storage room where he was found. Niall couldn’t have been sleeping comfortably on the hard floor of the storage room and he was supposed to not only sleep at night but also get a nap during the day whenever possible. Niall had bags under his eyes and Liam was determined to let the boy catch up on as much sleep as possible for the next few days while they had a break.

“I think he’s out” Zayn whispered in Liam’s ear towards the end of the movie.

 

Liam looked down happy to see that the baby was sleeping peacefully. Silently he stood up and carried Niall to his cot, tucking him in for the evening.


	6. Getting Ready for a Day Out

Niall woke up and stretched, or tried to stretch. He hit his arms on the sides of his cot and sat up rubbing his eyes. Sleeping on a bed is so much more comfortable than sleeping on the floor; he had to admit. Yesterday had been… different. There were parts of the day that had been nice such as getting changed, bathed, fed and even getting to watch a movie.

Yesterday also had some downfalls. He wasn’t able to get any time to himself, which was an issue seeing as how he’d grown used to being alone. Also as nice as yesterday was Niall knew that it wouldn’t last so there was no point in expecting it. Sooner or later the boys would become bored of him once again.

Liam had surprised him though, with the apology. No one had ever apologized to him before and it was different, nice though.

“Hey sleepyhead” Liam said coming up to Niall’s cot and letting the boy out. Liam put his hand on Niall’s nappy, “You wet?”

Niall just stayed silent, yes he had to go but his instincts are still to hold it in as long as possible.

“You need to go love” Liam tried to coax. He understood what Niall was doing and why but that didn’t mean it was all right. It wasn’t healthy for Niall to hold it in, “Just go love, I promise I’ll change you right away”

There was that word again, promise. Niall wasn’t sure that he could trust anyone’s promises. Still, he really had to go and Liam probably wasn’t going to let him down until he had. Sighing he was surprised at how uncomfortable it felt.

Liam felt the nappy grow warm and smiled a little, Niall may not like it but it was better this way. “Very good baby” he praised.

Wanting to keep his promise and also knowing that it was best for Niall, Liam carried the boy to the bathroom and changed him quickly taking note that the rash seemed to be starting to heal.

Once changed Liam put Niall in some day clothes and strapped him into his highchair for breakfast.

“So what are we up to today?” Zayn asked coming into the kitchen and sitting down to the right of Niall.

“I was thinking we could do some sight seeing since it’s out last day here” Harry suggested as he brought the eggs and bacon over to the table.

“That sounds like fun” Louis agreed.

“Yeah, but we need to be back in time for Niall’s nap” Liam said.

“Sounds like a plan then” Zayn agreed putting a place of food in front of Niall.

Niall was relieved as he listened to the boys discuss their plans for the day. He would have plenty of time to himself while the others were out. There was also a chance that he wouldn’t be left alone all day if Liam remembered him and came back.

“You need to eat baby,” Harry said brining Niall out of his thoughts.

Niall looked down at the food in front of him and sighed. He had filled himself yesterday and he really didn’t have room for any more food. Making his decision he pushed the food away.

Liam couldn’t help how guilty he felt right now. Niall had been starving that first meal and had shoved the food down his throat but after that he hadn’t been hungry. Niall has probably been living off of a sandwich and an apple a week if Liam was right. Forcing all of this food down Niall’s throat wasn’t going to do anything but cause the boy to puke. Still though Niall did need to eat something as they were going to have a busy day and then Liam would bring along various snacks for the boy to have throughout the day.

“Niall, you have to eat something” Zayn encouraged as he pushed the plate back in front of Niall.

Niall though didn’t want the food. Normally he’d just sit quietly but he was upset at the boys, they had ignored him for weeks and then now they expect him to bend over backwards and do as they say when he knew that he didn’t want to eat.

“Here babe” Liam said sensing a fight coming from the silent boy, “Just try a few bites and then you can be done”

Niall looked at Liam for a few moments, sizing him up. Eventually he relented knowing that taking just a few bites was something that he could handle and it would get the boys off his back.

Louis shot Liam a questioning look as Niall debated his options. Liam just shushed his silently and pointed to the now eating boy.

After Niall had eaten three bites he pushed his plate away again and wasn’t bothered any longer. Unfortunately for him he couldn’t just get up and go to his corner since he was strapped into his seat.

The boys all finished their breakfast while discussing where it was that they wanted to go. Once finished Harry and Louis started cleaning the kitchen, Zayn went to call Paul and tell them their plans and Liam got a bottle for Niall.

“Alright love just drink what you can” Liam said as he set the bottle on Niall’s tray. Normally Liam would feed Niall the bottle himself but he needed to pack a backpack with snacks, bottles, nappies, cream and other necessities for Niall while they were gone.

Niall stared at the bottle in front of him. He was a little thirsty and Liam had said that he only had to drink as much as he could not all of it. It was obvious that the boys weren’t going to let him out anytime soon. Niall just hoped that they let him out of this chair before they left.

Liam finished packing and turned to Niall to see the boy slowly sipping at his bottle. He smirked at his small victory as he went over to let Niall out of his seat. “Do you need a change love?”

Niall didn’t say anything as Liam lifted him up, he was in a fresh nappy and he actually didn’t have to go to the bathroom. He couldn’t help but smile a little at that as he sipped on the orange juice.

Liam counted it as a small victory when he noticed Niall’s smile granted it only lasted for a millisecond and it was almost unnoticeable but it had been there.

Just as Niall placed his mostly full bottle onto the table apparently done with it there was a knock at the door. “I’ll get it” Liam called out as he set Niall down and then took hold of his hand. Every time that Niall had been left on his own for even a second the boy had tried to go off to the storage room so Liam had made it his personal mission to either have a hold of Niall in some way or have Niall stuck in the room until he could be let out for the foreseeable future.

“Hey Paul” Liam greeted as he opened the door.

“Liam” Paul said, “Niall”

“Hey Paul” Niall greeted.

 

All of the boys froze and turned to stare at Niall. That was the first time they’d heard him say anything in over a day and it was to Paul.


	7. A Day Out

As the morning went on Liam had to admit that he was becoming a little jealous of Paul. Niall had been lively and active around Paul or the fans – really anyone other than the boys.

The boys had visited the local museums and the art gallery and the beach was their last stop because they had run out of places to go near enough to the bus for Paul’s comfort. Every museum they went to Liam made sure that he had Niall by the hand so that the boy wouldn’t get lost.

Liam had made sure to offer Niall food approximately every thirty minutes – nothing big just a few grapes here a pack of gummies there. Typically Niall would turn down all offers but he usually accepted the grapes or the fruit making Liam take a mental note to get more.

Niall had been enjoying his day. He loved being around Paul, the man had always been fun to hang around. Paul was the one person who hadn’t changed in all of this. Paul was there because he was paid but he also was a lot of fun to tease and play around with.

The beach was the best. It has been so long since he’d been to the beach and he loved to swim. The biggest issue was that Liam wasn’t letting Niall go to far. Niall was a wonderful swimmer and he loved to be in the water but Liam was extremely controlling. On numerous occasions Liam had physically stopped Niall from going in deeper than his waist. It was a stupid and pointless concern in Niall’s eyes but Liam just wasn’t letting up.

Eventually Niall got sick of it and got out of the water choosing to pester Paul instead. It was amusing to see how far he could annoy the man before Paul decided to step in. Niall particularly loved it because he could be as cheeky as he wanted and he and Paul always got a good kick out of it.

About half an hour later everyone wanted to leave the beach except for Niall. He was having actual fun for the first time in a long time. Unfortunately for Niall he didn’t have any say in the matter though that’s not to say he didn’t try. As everyone started to head towards the van Niall had other ideas.

“Niall let’s go” Louis called from the side of the van.

Niall stopped where he was and refused to move.

“Niall” Harry called.

Niall didn’t want to leave the beach; he was having fun with Paul so instead of going towards the van as he was told he gave Paul a small smirk and started to run the other direction.

“Niall!” Liam had yelled completely terrified that something would happen to Niall if the lad got too far. He should have never let Niall alone!

Niall made it about halfway down the beach before Paul caught up with him. “Gotcha” Paul joked as he picked Niall up and started carrying him towards the boys.

“No Paul” Niall complained squirming around trying to get free.

“I’d stop squirming” Paul warned.

“No” Niall said smiling.

“OK then I warned you” Paul said turning Niall around and digging into his sides.

Niall yelped in surprise before he started giggling like mad. This was one of the reasons he enjoyed being around Paul – the man could always make him laugh.

Paul carried Niall back to the Liam while ticking him the entire time. The boys were all absolutely stunned to hear Niall laughing so freely, especially after the boy had been absolutely silent for the past day and a half.

“Alright you, time to head back” Paul said dropping Niall in front of Liam.

Liam put Niall into the van and buckled him in before climbing in next to him. As soon as Niall had been given to Liam the boy had sobered up and fallen back into his silent and docile routine. It hurt Liam to see Niall like this after having watched him be so happy just seconds ago with Paul.

“Did you have a good time love?” Liam asked running his hand through Niall’s hair.

Niall was worried that he would be in trouble for running off like he had but he just wanted to have fun and stay at the beach. He couldn’t help it that he tensed slightly when Liam reached his hand up – it was a reflex he’d learned early in life. Relief flooded through him when Liam just ran his hand through Niall’s hair.

Liam sighed when he felt Niall tense under his hand but was pleased that it only lasted a split second. “You’re not in trouble love” Liam assured the boy.

Niall shot a sideways glance at Liam sizing him up before accepting his words. Once Niall knew he wasn’t in trouble he relaxed a little and sat back in his seat turning to look out the window. He had enjoyed the beach but he was a bit thirsty, he couldn’t believe that he was actually hoping Liam would offer him a bottle; he’d been turning them down all day.

Liam watched Niall as they pulled out. The boy kept licking his lips as he stared resolutely out the window. Liam really wished that Niall would just ask for what he needed but he also knew that he and the boys were responsible for Niall’s unwillingness to do so.

“So what are we doing for lunch?” Harry asked popping his head up from the back seat.

“I want a seafood,” Zayn stated.

“No I want chicken,” Louis argued.

“You’re getting burgers” Paul said from the drivers seat effectively ending the argument as he pulled into a drive thru.

“You want a bottle Niall?” Liam asked as he pulled out the bottle of water than he’d offered Niall at least seven times that day already.

Niall looked over at the bottle Liam held out. He was thirsty. Making his decision he reached out and took the bottle.

Liam was happy to see Niall finally drink something. He let Niall alone after that until they reached the bus. Once they were parked Liam took the bottle and carried Niall into the kitchen strapping him into his seat. He was about to turn around and give Paul a small grocery list when there was suddenly a hand on his arm.

Shocked, Liam turned to see that it was Niall who had stopped him, “What’s wrong baby?”

Niall hesitated still surprised with himself but he really wanted his water back. He hesitated for a few moments, waiting for the rest of the boys to head out of the room for one reason or another before whispering as quietly as possible, “water”

“What?” Liam asked because he really couldn’t hear though he was elated that Niall had actually said something to him.

Niall hesitated. He couldn’t believe that he’d screwed up, things had been going well; he had even gotten to go out and sight see today (though he did get annoyed with Liam constantly hovering over him). Now he’d screwed up and he couldn’t take it back.

Liam could see the uncertainty in Niall and he wanted to encourage the boy to talk to him. “Whatever you need Niall just ask. I’ll get it. I promise”

Niall looked up at Liam. He had chosen to ask Liam, alone, because he had been the kindest to him lately. Even when the boys were ignoring him Liam had usually been the one to change him (granted it was only once a day but still). Even before the age play started it was Liam who always made sure he was all right if he was sick or if he was hurt.

If Niall were to believe anyone it would be Liam, “Water” he said slightly louder.

Liam barely heard Niall this time but he had heard him! “Of course” he said excitedly as he jumped up and grabbed the bottle Niall had been drinking from earlier, filling it up and then handing it to the boy.

“What you so excited about?” Zayn asked as he came into the room carrying the food.

Liam wanted to jump around and brag to Zayn that Niall had talked to him – one whole word! – but he didn’t want to make Niall feel guilty or embarrassed. Instead he just shook his head, “I have to give Paul a grocery list real quick” he said excusing himself.

Zayn shook his head but let it go. “You hungry baby?” he asked as he turned to see Niall sipping on his bottle quietly.

As expected Niall didn’t say anything, he didn’t even stop drinking but nonetheless Zayn platted a burger and fries for Niall before starting in on his own food.

Once again Niall barely ate his food but he did drink all his milk so Liam counted it as improvement. After they were finished Liam left the boys to clean up while he took Niall upstairs. “If you have to go it’s alright, I’ll change you immediately I promise”

Liam had noticed that Niall had been doing well when he promised something. Granted Niall had only trusted small, miniscule promises but he needed to keep the small ones before Niall would trust the big ones.

Niall debated whether or not he could trust Liam on this. Liam had promised to change him before and he had done it. Liam had also kept his promise that Niall could have what he needed and he’d given Niall the water. Maybe Liam would keep his promise on changing him.

Liam waited anxiously to see if Niall would trust him with this. Small trusts were the way to go at the moment. He had to master the small stuff before moving onto the big stuff. He sighed in relief when he felt Niall’s nappy grow heavy. “Good boy” he praised as he kissed Niall’s forehead and carried him into the bathroom.

A nappy change later and Niall was laid out in his cot in just a nappy and a t-shirt for his nap. “Sleep well love” Liam said as he tucked Niall in and shut the cot.

 

This morning had gone better than he had hoped for.


	8. Alone Time

Liam’s list for Paul had been short and the man came back with everything that he had requested. Liam gave the groceries to Louis to put away while he took the new baby monitor and set it up by Niall’s cot. After everything was put away it was merely a matter of waiting for his baby to wake up from his nap. 

It took about another half hour before Liam finally heard something from the monitor and happily took himself up to his little boy. “Hey there sleepyhead. Have a nice nap?” he asked in his typical greeting.

Niall shrugged, he was still getting used to someone coming to get him. He was getting used to a lot of things this past day and a half and he was still extremely doubtful that this would continue. His gut instincts were that the boys would go back to being their usual neglectful selves as soon as the tour started back up.

“What do you say we go find something fun to do” Liam said happily as he lifted Niall out of his cot and carried him downstairs.

“Yes! Niall’s up” Harry cheered upon seeing him, “Now we can have some fun”

“Ooh, I call first dibbs with him” Louis exclaimed rushing over and taking Niall from Liam.

Niall was slightly confused at the boys antics but didn’t fight against being taken by Louis and carried into the front room of the bus, it had a smaller TV but a larger open area in the center.

“So what would you like to play?” Louis asked as he deposited Niall in the middle of the floor and then turned to pull different options out of the toy box that they had set up against the wall. “Would you like Legos or racecars?”

Louis pulled both items out of the toy box and then turned around to see if Niall would pick one of the options only to meet an empty room, “Damn”

Niall had waited until Louis had turned around and was no longer paying attention to him before he headed out of the room and up the stairs to his corner. He seriously needed some alone time.

Liam wanted to give Louis a chance to be alone with Niall and he had absolutely no intention of interrupting them but he just had to see his baby. He had just poked his head around the doorway when he heard Louis mutter a curse word. Curiosity getting the better of him Liam leaned a little farther into the room looking around and finding that he couldn’t see one key person, “Where’s Niall?”

Louis jerked his head around, “He was just here”

Liam sighed, “What happened?”

“I set him down then turned to pick out something from the toy box…”

“You turned your back on him!” Liam cut in. How could Louis be so stupid? How could he? Liam knew that Niall would take any chance to head off to his little hideaway. Liam really didn’t like Niall being all-alone in the storage room; too many things could happen to the lad, it just wasn’t safe.

“I only turned my back on him for a second” Louis defended himself.

“Dimmit Louis! If you’re going to take him then you have to keep an eye on him at ALL times. You should know this!”

“What’s going on?” Zayn asked coming into the room.

“Louis let Niall out of his sight” Liam explained before letting the two alone as he went after Niall.

Liam just couldn’t believe he had been stupid enough to let Niall out of his sight. He had promised Niall that he wouldn’t forget about him or ignore him again and yet not even a day later and the kid had slipped out of his sight. Honestly he’d have to make sure that he was with Niall from now on. He would also have to talk to the rest of the boys on properly taking care of Niall.

Liam found Niall just where he had been before only this time Niall had a composition book on his lap and a pencil in his hand while listening to his music on his headphones. Out of curiosity Liam stood off to the side a bit to see what it was that Niall was doing. He was amazed with what he saw.

“That looks beautiful love” Liam said as he leaned down to Niall’s level.

Niall whipped his head up to see Liam standing over him. He hadn’t expected anyone to come looking for him (well he had wondered on Liam but he didn’t think it would be so soon). Quickly he shoved his composition book back into it’s hiding space knowing he’d have to find a new place for it soon before looking back up to Liam.

Liam smiled sadly as he watched Niall hide away his art. It had been beautiful and Liam would love to see what Niall could do with the proper supplies. Still his concern right now was Niall so he took the boys headphones off and crouched down in front of him.

“Why did you run off love?” Liam asked softly. He didn’t want to scare Niall or make the lad think that he was in trouble. Niall had done nothing wrong, sure he didn’t want Niall out of his sight or crouched here on the ground in a corner in the storage room but it wasn’t something that he blamed Niall for. No Liam blamed himself.

Niall watched Liam not saying anything. Liam didn’t sound upset but then Niall wasn’t absolutely positive so he let it be.

“I’m not upset. I just want you to know that you don’t have to hide away up here ever again” Liam reached out and ran his hand through Niall’s hair before settling it on the boy’s shoulder.

Niall just stared blankly at Liam processing everything. He wasn’t upset about having a place to himself where he could clear his head and be alone. He was almost always alone when he was a child (unless he was around his mother but that wasn’t something he wanted to think about). When he and the other four were first grouped together Niall had often sought out time for himself, it had decreased slowly over time but he still couldn’t go a full day without having some time alone. Then Liam had started the whole age play thing and his alone time had been greatly diminished but still there nonetheless. Once on tour he had all the time alone he could ever want but now. Well now he just sorely wanted some time to himself.

“Alone” Niall said quietly.

Liam didn’t fully understand what Niall was trying to say. Liam was one who liked to care for others and had never liked the amount of time Niall had spent secluding himself, it was one thing that he had been trying to get rid of since he’d met the boy. In Liam’s opinion it wasn’t healthy for Niall to spend so much time alone so he viewed it as a bad thing. “You don’t have to be alone love” he tired to sooth.

Niall wasn’t sure he liked the idea of never being alone. Liam said it like it was a good thing but he just didn’t agree. “Want”

Liam was confused. “What do you mean baby?”

Niall sighed; he probably wasn’t going to get away with just a one-word answer, maybe two, “Want alone”

“You want to be alone?”

Niall nodded his head vigorously happy that Liam seemed to finally be getting it.

Liam was a bit concerned, why would Niall want time alone? Liam knew though that it wasn’t something that the boys could be fully blamed for, yes they had exacerbated the issue but it had always been this way. Honestly Niall was about as bad as he was when the band was first put together. Was it a good idea to let Niall have this time? It wouldn’t help Liam make sure that Niall was safe but Niall had been sitting here for over a month and been completely fine.

“I tell you what we’ll make a deal,” Liam offered.

“Deal?” Niall asked skeptically. What kind of deal did Liam have in mind?

“Yes” Liam sighed, “I will give you half an hour, you can sit here and listen to your music and draw. I will be right outside the door on my bunk, the door to this room needs to stay open but I’ll let you alone and make sure no one else enters. At the end of the half hour I will come get you and we’ll go down stairs and have supper.”

Niall thought it over. He wasn’t completely thrilled that he wouldn’t have a lot of time to be alone but Liam was offering him what he wanted. If Liam honestly wanted he could just pick Niall up and force him to be with someone all the time never getting to be alone. “Promise?” he asked.

Liam smiled, so the promises were working, “I promise”

Niall nodded his assent and put his headphones back on. Liam left the room but made sure that the door was wide open before going to sit on his bunk.

It was a relaxing thirty minutes for Niall but Liam was stressing out the entire time. Liam just hated the fact that he couldn’t see Niall and know what he was doing or that he was all right. The second the thirty minutes were up Liam was in the storage room and picking Niall up.

Dinner was a simple affair, Niall ate little as usual but he was doing much better drinking his bottles. Liam also noticed that Niall was still saying absolutely nothing in front of the other boys, only when they were alone.

 

After dinner Liam took Niall upstairs and bathed him (after insuring that the lad used his nappy) and then dressed him in a footed onesie and took him downstairs for a movie before bed. All in all Liam would classify it as a wonderful day, a complete breakthrough! Now he just had to work on the other boys.


	9. Throwing

Niall felt a bit off when he woke up the next morning. His head hurt and his stomach was bothering him also he noticed that he had wet his nappy at some point in the night and it was rather uncomfortable. He sat up and rubbed his eyes noticing two things: 1) that the bus was moving meaning that they were traveling and 2) he was tired and wanted nothing more than to go back to sleep. Debating his options Niall sat for a moment checking to see if he could tolerate his wet nappy enough to go back to sleep – it didn’t work. His rash with his souled nappy just didn’t go together. Sighing he sat back planning to wait until either someone came to get him or he was so tired he fell asleep despite his discomfort.

Liam heard rustling on the baby monitor followed by a slight sigh. Knowing that his baby was up he hurried up the stairs. Liam had realized yesterday that he was making good progress with Niall however the lad would only speak when they were alone. Liam had planned on talking to the others about it after he’d put Niall to bed last night only to find them passed out in the T.V. room. Liam had let them alone knowing they’d have plenty of time to talk over the next four days while they were all stuck on the bus traveling to their next location.

“Morning baby” Liam greeted happily as he lifted Niall out of his cot, “Your nappy wet love?” he asked while simultaneously slipping his hand down to check.

“Yes” Niall answered dejectedly. Despite the fact that he had come to terms with the idea that he had to use the nappy he was still embarrassed by it.

Liam was elated at having received a verbal response from Niall right off. It was a good sign that Niall was talking to him still granted it was only a word at a time but it was a major improvement in Liam’s opinion.

“Well let’s get you changed then shall we” Liam said as he grabbed a onesie and a pair of shorts overalls from the suitcase and carried Niall into the bathroom.

Niall didn’t quite care for all of this moving around; it wasn’t helping his stomach any. He had to admit though that a fresh nappy felt so much better and his rash seemed to be healing nicely as well. Still he felt as though he would throw up as he was strapped into the highchair and a plate of fruit and bowl of oatmeal was placed on the tray in front of him along with a bottle or orange juice.

Niall wasn’t trying to be difficult but no matter what he knew that he wouldn’t be able to stomach even a bite of the food so he merely pushed it away.

“Niall you need to eat” Harry said pushing the plate back in front of Niall. Harry was really growing tired of the boy refusing to eat at every meal. Still Liam was right and it was their fault so he was trying to keep calm.

Niall knew that it would be easier to simply tell the boys why he didn’t want to eat but he was mad at them. He was mad at them for forcing him into age play, he was mad at them for taking away his independence, he was mad at them for ignoring him for almost seven weeks. But the thing that angered him more than all of that was the fact that they were now sitting here pretending that they truly gave a dam about his well-being, acting as though the past month and a half had never happened as though everything was perfect and it was he who was being unreasonable.

Knowing that the boys would be mad at him, knowing that he’d get in trouble but just too angry to care Niall picked up his plate and threw it across the kitchen and then set his head against his arms on the tray.

All the boys sat still, shocked at what Niall had just done. They’d never seen him act out like that not even at the start of all this had Niall done something so… destructive, for lack of a better word.

It was Louis who came to first. He knew that he had been neglecting Niall and that he had a lot to make up for but that did not make Niall’s behavior all right. If Niall had done this at home he would have been spanked so that is exactly what Louis intended to do.

Louis stood up and took Niall out of his seat, carrying him into the sitting room right off of the kitchen. He sat Niall down on his lap turning the boy so that they were facing each other. “You know the rules Niall correct?”

Niall knew very well what Louis was planning to do and why he was going to do it. That didn’t mean that he agreed with what Louis was going to do nor did it mean that it would make his stomach or his head feel any better. For the first time since this all started Niall was really wishing that Liam would come and find him. Silly as it may be he just wanted Liam to come and make it all better.

At the same time Niall wanted nothing more than to be allowed to be left alone to deal with his illness on his own. He had no desire to be where he was now, about to over Louis’ lap and get spanked for throwing a plate of food across the room. OK maybe he shouldn’t have thrown the plate but still, he was mad at them.

Louis had been trying to get Niall to answer him but the lad just wasn’t listening, he was lost in his own world, his own head. Sighing Louis laid Niall across his lap and smacked his bum swiftly a few times in order to get his attention. He hadn’t expected the result he got.

Niall was surprised when Louis turned him upside down. The swats were painful but they weren’t the real issue, the new position upset his stomach and the pressure of it being pushed against Louis’ knees well… he really tried not to.

“Oh baby” Louis cooed. He had no idea that Niall wasn’t feeling well he’d just thought that the lad was being difficult.

As soon as Louis loosened his grip Niall scrambled off of his lap and practically bolted for the safety of his corner. He had to stop at the upstairs bathroom though in order to wash the taste of the vomit out of his mouth.

Liam had been knocked out of his surprise the last of all the boys. He had thought that Niall was making such good progress; there was no reason for Niall to do something like that. What startled him back into reality was the strange sound of retching coming from the sitting room. He made it out of the kitchen just in time for Niall to burst past him.

“What happened?” Liam asked coming into the sitting room only to fine the other three boys already there.

“Niall’s ill” Zayn answered as Harry and Louis started cleaning up the mess on the floor.

“He’s ill?” Liam repeated confused.

“He threw up when I started to spank him” Louis said.

“You started too…” Liam couldn’t believe it Louis had actually started to spank Niall!

“He threw a plate of food Liam,” Harry cut him off, “He can’t just get away with it”

On some level Liam knew that yes Niall did have to have boundaries and consequences but he just felt so guilty still. Liam didn’t think he’d ever be able to punish Niall but he knew it was for the best; Niall would suffer if he was allowed to get away with everything.

Pushing all of that aside Liam turned to Zayn, “Mind grabbing the thermometer while I go and fetch Niall?”

“Course” Zayn nodded as he walked out of the room.

Liam went straight to Niall’s little hide away. “Niall baby” he when he saw Niall hunched over in his corner.

Niall looked up at Liam. He didn’t want to deal with any of the boys right now, he just wasn’t feeling up to it.

“Oh honey” Liam said sadly as he picked Niall up and started carrying him down to the TV room. “You should have said you weren’t feeling well”

“Why didn’t you tell us?” Harry asked coming in to see Niall for himself.

“You need to tell us when you’re not feeling well love” Louis added.

Niall just couldn’t take it! All of them were acting as though he should have come running to them the second he woke up to tell them his woes. They were acting as though he should trust them. Why should he trust them? What reason have they given him to trust them? He was just so irritated he was about to burst!

“Got the items” Zayn said coming into the room carrying a bottle of water, gel and Niall’s thermometer.

That seemed to be the last straw for Niall because he suddenly broke himself out of Liam’s hold and started shouting, “Leave me alone! You’ve screwed everything up and you need to live with it! I’m sick of this! Quite pretending that you care and just go back to focusing on your own lives and let me deal with mine!”

All the boys were stunned, Niall was finally speaking to them and it was to scream at them. Though they all knew that they deserved it.

“We just want to help you…” Harry started but he didn’t get far.

“No!” Niall screamed, “The last thing you’re doing is helping! I’ve already had a shitty childhood I don’t want another!”

Liam stood up and grabbed Niall, picking him up and holding him as close as he could. “Oh baby. It was never my intent to screw this up and I know that I have and I can’t tell you how sorry I am for that. I promise you I will fix this and things will get better, they’ll be good. I promise you this will all work out you just wait and see”

As he spoke Liam sat down with Niall and held the crying lad in his lap doing his best to soothe him.

“I hate childhood” Niall cried into Liam’s chest.

Liam’s heart broke. Most people looked back on their childhood and found mostly happy times, but poor Niall had no good memories of his youth. Liam had wanted to give him some good memories of childhood, something that wouldn’t give him nightmares. He had failed once; he wasn’t going to fail again.

“Love, I will fix this,” he promised, unfortunately he still had a sick baby on his lap. “I need to take care of this, I need to take your temperature and then I’ll get you some medicine and you can watch a movie and take a nap alright?”

Niall hesitated; he didn’t want to have his temperature taken! The rest didn’t sound so bad though. He did maybe, possibly, slightly trust Liam and if he were to let anyone take care of him it would be Liam. Slowly, ever so slightly, he nodded his head in assent and then felt himself being gently maneuvered onto his stomach once again.

To say Niall despised having his temperature taken would be an understatement. He cringed as he felt the tip of the thermometer push against him. He hated the way the cold item slid into him and then it had to be kept there for five minutes, held there no less by Liam. The second the thermometer was out of him Niall made to sit up and cover himself, he didn’t like being so exposed.

“All done there love” Liam cooed softly as he sat Niall up and redid his nappy.

“Here Ni, drink this, it’ll make you feel better” Zayn instructed as he crouched down in front of Niall with a bottle of sprite and medicine.

Niall took the bottle and sucked on it slowly knowing that Zayn had been nice and mixed the evil medicine in so that he wouldn’t have to taste it.

 

Liam kept good on his promise and soon enough Niall was laid out across Liam and Zayn fast asleep.


	10. A Bath and A Bottle

Niall had awoken from his nap after three hours which Liam and Zayn viewed as a good thing, nothing better to help a sick baby get better than a lot of sleep and plenty of fluids.

When Niall woke up he noticed that he was having trouble breathing because his nose was all stuffed up and it hurt. He was sick of this! Nothing seemed to be going his way lately and it sucked. To be sick on top of that was just icing on the cake. He hadn’t even noticed that he’d started crying until Zayn came into his view.

“Oh baby what’s wrong?”

Niall looked at Zayn, he seemed honestly worried which was strange. Still though Niall didn’t want him he wanted Liam. “Go away”

Zayn was hurt by Niall’s words he had to admit, still though it was his own fault. “Baby please” he picked Niall up and sat him on his lap, “I can’t begin to express how sorry I am that I ignored you. There’s no excuse for it and I can’t change what I did or turn back the clock no matter how badly I wish I could. One thing I can do is promise you that I will never forget about you again. I will always be here for you”

There was that word again; it seemed to be popping up a lot lately. This time though it came from Zayn and not Liam. Niall had learned that Liam could be trusted to keep the little promises that he made. The question Niall was faced with now was, could he trust Zayn?

As much as Niall wanted to debate this in his head he felt like crap and Zayn had been nice earlier when he hid the medicine in the soda (Niall was almost never allowed to have soda anymore) and he had sat with Niall and comforted him while Liam took his temperature. Maybe Zayn could help now?

“Nose hurts” Niall whimpered out quietly.

It took Zayn a moment to understand what Niall meant, “Oh” he pulled Niall closer as though simply being held against Zayn’s chest would make his baby all better, “How about a nice hot bath hmm? I have some bath salts upstairs that are supposed to help clear a stuffy nose? How does that sound?”

Niall thought about it for a moment, a bath did sound good and if the salts worked the way Zayn said they would then it would feel really nice. “OK” he agreed.

Zayn smiled at the verbal response that was almost an actual conversation. He was still smiling as he informed Liam of their plans (because really Liam was being obsessively overbearing especially since learning that Niall was sick) and then carried Niall up the stairs.

“Do you need to use your nappy love?” Zayn asked. He knew that Niall had been holding it in as long as possible, Liam had filled all the boys in – lectured them for over two hours – on the changes that he’d seen with Niall and how best to handle the lad.

Niall thought about it for a moment before eventually blushing furiously as he went in his nappy.

“That’s my boy” Zayn praised as he started filling the tub and then laid Niall out to undress him.

Niall stayed in the tub for almost an hour and would have happily stayed longer only the water was turning too cold to be healthy and Zayn wouldn’t allow it. The bath had been amazing, the warm water had helped to sooth his stiff muscles and the salts had cleared his nose. He could move and breathe easier and he hated having to get out of the bath.

“I know and I’m sorry baby” Zayn apologized as Niall grumbled while he dried the younger lad off and dressed him in a new nappy and a footed onesie.

Once the boy was dressed Zayn carried him back downstairs where a worried Liam was waiting impatiently for his baby. “How is he?” Liam questioned the second Zayn came down.

“He’s doing just fine” Zayn answered rolling his eyes and handing Niall over.

“Don’t mock me because I’m worried” Liam scolded as he strapped Niall into his highchair.

Niall whined and squirmed as he was restrained, he didn’t want to eat anything and he didn’t want to be trapped in this stupid seat. “I’m not a baby,” he complained.

“Yes you are love,” Liam corrected.

“No” Niall argued, “I don’t want to do this anymore”

Liam sighed, he had figured this would be coming but that didn’t mean it changed anything. “Niall, sweetheart, look at me” Liam waited patiently until Niall lifted his head and met Liam’s gaze, “I know that we screwed this up, that I screwed this up” Liam could see that Niall was getting hopeful so he wanted to make himself clear, “however it doesn’t mean that age play is a bad thing for you”

“Yes it is” Niall insisted, “I’m not a baby and I hate being treated like one”

“It is good for you when it’s done right” Zayn said coming into the conversation, “And I promise you that it will be done right from now on”

“You had never been doing so well as you were during that first month of this” Liam said. It was the truth Niall had never looked so healthy or happy as he had during that first month when all the boys were giving Niall their full attention and taking care of the little lad. If they hadn’t screwed things up Niall would be a happy and healthy little baby right now.

Niall had understood the meaning behind Zayn’s words. Saying that they would be ‘doing it right from now on’ meant that none of the boys had any intention of stopping this stupid age play thing and it irritated Niall. Unfortunately he had absolutely no say in whether or not he had to participate in this, that had been made clear at the start of everything.

Zayn and Liam both recognized Niall’s silence as an indication to move on from the conversation. Liam placed a small plate of fruit on Niall’s tray as Zayn made a bottle and gathered up a few other supplies.

“Not hungry” Niall grumbled as he stared at the evil food.

“You need to try and eat something bud” Liam said as he put a piece of fruit on a fork and held it up to Niall’s mouth, “Just a little”

Niall knew that starving himself would only hinder his cold so reluctantly he opened his mouth to accept the food. After only five pieces however he was done.

Liam put the rest of the fruit in a container to save for later and took Niall into the front room. He hesitated as he tried to find the best way to tell Niall of what it was he was about to do knowing that the lad wouldn’t like it, “Alright love” he said gently, “I’m just going to check your temperature real quick and then…”

“No” Niall whined interrupting Liam.

“I just want to see if your temperature gone down babe” Liam explained.

“No” Niall said again but what he wanted really wasn’t going to effect Liam’s decision in the matter.

“Sorry but this needs to be done” Liam apologized.

Liam gently maneuvered a struggling Niall onto his stomach and undid his onesie and nappy. Zayn came over and took Niall’s upper half onto his lap. He knew how much Niall hated this and he couldn’t blame the boy he’d hate it too. Zayn started rubbing Niall’s back and ruffling his hair as he whispered soothing comforts to the distressed lad until Liam finally removed the thermometer.

Zayn quickly got Niall up and righted his clothing before handing him a bottle of soda and meds.

Niall smiled when he saw the bottle, Zayn was being real nice about all of this and he loved soda.

“You’re going to get him on a sugar high” Liam gently scolded as he cleaned up happy to note that Niall’s temperature had gone down.

“Oh let him alone” Zayn said brushing off Liam’s concern, “the poor baby’s sick”

Niall smirked at Liam as he continued to drink from his bottle happily.

 

Liam just shook his head but couldn’t help the smile that came to his face, fully aware that Niall was currently the happiest he’d been with just them in a long while.


	11. Last Morning

OK so I typed two chapters today meaining I post two today. Also if there are any suggestions I would gladly accept them. I need ideas.

The next couple of days went by in much the same fashion for Niall. Liam would be the one to take him out of his cot and change his nappy before feeding him a bit of breakfast. After breakfast Liam insisted on taking his temperature (Liam said that he would stop taking it after Niall went three days without one and Liam was taking it three times a day!).

There was one good thing about having his temperature taken though, Zayn. Every time Liam took Niall’s temperature Zayn would stay and comfort him then when Liam was done Zayn would give Niall a bottle of soda (the meds were no longer necessary and it was only a little bit but it was still nice).

After Liam was done Louis and Harry would take Niall and they would do their best to entertain the boy until lunch. After lunch Liam would take Niall's temperature then it was Niall’s naptime.

Niall would wake up in his cot about an hour and a half later and Zayn would give him a nice hot bath with bubbles. The bath was one of Niall’s favorites, the hot water always felt so good to his muscles and the bubbles were fun.

After bath time was supper and then Niall would relax with Liam and Zayn, Harry and Louis tended to join them. A movie later and Niall would be out cold. Liam would carry Niall to his cot and tuck him in for the night.

Today was the last day of traveling and it was also the third day for Niall. If he went today without a temperature them Liam would stop taking it! Niall couldn’t say how happy he was going to be at the end of the day. He still didn’t understand why Liam was being so obsessive about this; he’d been symptom free for half a day now.

“Morning baby boy” Liam greeted smiling as he lifted the lad out of his cot, “Are you wet”

“Yes” Niall sighed. One thing that had come from his cold was that he started wetting himself in his sleep and unfortunately that didn’t seem to be going away.

“Well then we should get you cleaned up” Liam said as he walked to the bathroom. Liam was pleased to note that Niall’s rash was completely gone, “I bet you feel better now don’t you” he said as he finished dressing Niall in a green collared short sleeve onesie and a pair of jean shorts.

Niall shrugged, yes it felt better to be in a clean nappy than a soiled one however he would rather not be in a nappy at all.

“Hey baby” Harry said happily as Liam carried Niall into the kitchen.

Niall just blinked at Harry. While yes he had been spending time with Harry and Louis lately he had yet to actually talk to them. Niall still didn’t trust Harry and Louis and he didn’t see the point in appeasing their guilt when he had no reason to.

Harry sighed; he really wanted Niall to talk to him even if it was just yelling at him. Harry knew that he was getting nowhere with Niall and it was frustrating. Liam had told him that it would take time, that Harry just had to keep working at it but he really wanted Niall to forgive him now.

“Breakfast is up” Louis called happily coming over to the table with eggs and bacon as well as fruit.

Niall was actually somewhat interested in the food this morning. He had been steadily increasing the amount of food he ate at a meal – now no it wasn’t up to a healthy portion yet but it was getting there.

“I’ll help the baby this morning” Zayn offered as he fixed a plate for Niall and then himself.

Niall made to take the fork and plate from Zayn but the older boy seemed to have other ideas. Really Niall was getting tired of this, he was 21 years old and the boys insisted on feeding him! Ever since Liam had fed him the fruit the first day he was sick either Liam or Zayn would feed him rather than let him feed himself. Louis and Harry had tried to feed Niall once but he refused to open his mouth and had thrown a grade a fit until Liam or Zayn took over. Niall might not like being fed but he despised being fed by someone he didn’t trust in any way.

“Open up baby” Zayn said bringing a forkful of egg up to Niall’s mouth.

Niall looked down at the fork and then at Zayn shooting him a pleading look before finally opening his mouth.

After Niall was fed Zayn placed a bottle of orange juice on his tray and then the boys all discussed the following days. They were all starting back up on their tour tomorrow and what their schedule would be. Niall’s heart sunk as he listened to them.

He’d never admit it but Niall had actually enjoyed all the attention that he’d been receiving over the past few days. It was nice not having a rash or to sit in a wet nappy all day. Having a steady supply of meals, snacks and drinks wasn’t something he was going to complain about. Sleeping in a real bed and getting baths was amazing. As soon as the tour started back up everything would go back to the way it had before. This was his last day before everything was ruined again.

Liam and Zayn had promised him that they wouldn’t forget about him again and Niall really wanted to believe them, he did. He just couldn’t. Too much history had proven that Niall was easily forgettable and that he wasn’t that important. Niall would admit that he was starting to trust Liam and Zayn with the little things but he didn’t trust them with much more.

“Alright baby, let’s get this over with” Liam said taking Niall out of the highchair.

Zayn followed them into the front room and took Niall’s upper half into his lap and started to comfort the boy as best he could. Zayn really felt bad for Niall but he had tried to talk Liam out of his ridiculous demand but Liam was insistent. Liam had insisted that he had to make sure that Niall was completely over his cold. Zayn believed that Liam was just being extremely protective because he felt guilty and was trying to overcompensate.

As soon as Liam was done Zayn received a lap full of Niall but he didn’t mind. He fixed Niall’s clothing and then handed over the small bottle of soda. Niall smiled and happily took the bottle and started drinking. Zayn laughed and grabbed a hold of the bottom of the bottle to stop Niall from drinking too fast and chocking, he had learned that lesson just the past morning.

“I still say that’s not healthy” Liam commented shaking his head as he put away the thermometer.

“And I still say that you should go easy with the thermometer” Zayn replied.

Niall just curled into Zayn as he drank. It was a little annoying not being able to control how fast he was allowed to drink but then he had scared Zayn pretty bad the other morning when he started coughing because he’d gone too fast he’d swallowed some down the wrong hole.

“We’re here to take the baby” Louis smiled happily coming into the room.

Liam looked up at them skeptically, he still couldn’t help that he was nervous leaving Niall alone with Louis and Harry but they all screwed up and they all deserved the chance to make it up to Niall. Reluctantly he nodded his head and left the room but not before kissing Niall on the forehead and shooting a warning to the two in charge.

Zayn also had issue with this but like Liam he knew that Louis and Harry needed the time with Niall so he hugged Niall one last time before handing him over.

“Why do I always feel like we’re leaving our kid with a babysitter for the first time?” Liam asked Zayn as the two headed up the stairs to the sitting room at the front end of the top of the bus.

“Because we both know that Niall hasn’t forgiven them yet and he doesn’t feel completely comfortable around them” Zayn answered.

Liam sighed as he sunk down into one of the couches, “I just wish there could be a magic fix to all of this”

Zayn walked over and joined Liam on the couch as he picked up the controllers, “We screwed it up, we pay the price”

“I know. I know” Liam grumbled as he took the offered controller and turned the game on.

Niall was still in Harry’s hold. He didn’t really like being left alone with these two but he understood why Liam and Zayn allowed it. And didn’t it suck that he couldn’t even dictate whom he got to be around.

“So, what would you like to do today?” Louis asked as he dug through the toy box.

“Why don’t we try the basketball today?” Harry suggested as he carried Niall over.

The next few hours went on quickly for all despite the obvious edginess in every part of the bus. Regardless the second 11:30 rolled around Liam had Niall back in his arms and Zayn had lunch on the table.

 

After lunch Liam checked Niall’s temperature again, Niall got his soda and then he was put down for his afternoon nap.


	12. Last Evening

“Hey sweetheart” Zayn greeted as he woke Niall from his afternoon nap.

Niall groaned and rolled over, away from Zayn. As much as the fact that he actually feel asleep every day after lunch annoyed him greatly Niall still did not want to get up. He was comfortable and warm, why would anyone want to give that up?

Zayn chuckled, he found Niall’s antics cute but the lad did really need to get up. If Zayn let Niall sleep in now then the lad would never go to sleep at his bedtime. “I know babe” Zayn cooed softly as he plucked a pouting Niall from his cot.

Niall frowned at Zayn as he was carried into the front room and was laid out on the changing pad that was placed on the couch.

“Let’s get you clean shall we then?” Liam asked coming into Niall’s view.

Niall stayed quiet and compliant as Liam changed him but he was a bit surprised that Zayn hadn’t just taken him to the upstairs restroom for his bath. Niall liked his bath.

“All done” Liam said happily as he gave Niall a quick kiss to his forehead and then handed him over to an awaiting Zayn as he cleaned up.

Zayn sat on the other couch and placed Niall in his lap, turning the lad to face him, “Now” he started, “I know that you typically have a bath now however since you are no longer sick and we are about to start back up on the tour I was thinking that we should move your bath back to its original time, after supper.”

Niall frowned, he really liked his bath; if it was moved to after supper would it be as long? Would Zayn let him have bubbles still? Also once the tour started back up Niall really doubted that he would get another bath any time soon.

Zayn could see the irritation on Niall’s face, “What’s going through your mind baby?”

Niall looked up to Zayn’s face, “Like the baths”

“You will still have your baths babe” Zayn tried to assure.

“Not as nice” Niall whined.

Zayn was starting to understand a little, “You will still get to stay in there as long as it’s warm”

“Bubbles?”

Zayn pulled Niall close and chuckled, “Yes, there will still be bubbles”

Niall nodded at this; at least he’d have one last good bath on his last night. There was only one dilemma he had now, what the hell was he supposed to do? Niall adjusted himself on Zayn’s lap to get more comfortable as he thought out the rest of his day.

Zayn was a little surprised when Niall started wriggling around and then leaned back into him. When Niall had started moving Zayn had thought that the younger boy was trying to get away but instead he’d just wanted to cuddle closer.

As soon as Niall was comfortable he started debating what it was he wanted to do. This was important to him; it was his last evening before everything went back to the way it was before. He currently had four hours until supper and he could spend it pretty much any way he wanted. What was something that he sorely missed? Well the first thing that he missed was some time alone, yes he’d have plenty of that soon but he’d go stir-crazy without at least ten minutes to himself.

With his plan in mind Niall looked up at Liam, “Deal?” he asked only to realize that it came out a bit jumbled. Why were his words coming out strangely?

“You’re thumbs in your mouth love” Liam informed his confused baby.

Niall quickly yanked his thumb out of his mouth, how had he missed that? When did he put his thumb in his mouth? Whatever, “Deal?” he questioned again.

“Deal?” Liam repeated confused, what deal was Niall talking about?

“Deal” Niall stated.

“What deal is this then?” Zayn asked looking down at the boy in his lap.

Niall looked around at Zayn, “Alone deal”

“Oh” Liam said as it clicked, “You want the deal again?”

Niall choose to nod his head over a verbal response. He had yet to say more than a three-word response to anything. He was actually quite used to saying next to nothing, he hadn’t actually talked to someone other than himself for the first nine years of his life. He didn’t hold many conversations with himself meaning he spoke next to nothing for a little over nine years. To stay silent wasn’t a challenge for him; actually talking was more difficult.

Liam hesitated, he still didn’t like the idea of Niall being alone and the lad had just been sick. Still though, it was a good sign that Niall was asking for it instead of just finding a time to sneak off as he had done before. Sighing Liam nodded his head, “Alright but a half hour only”

Niall smiled and held out his arms for Liam to take him. Liam smiled; this was an amazing sign of improvement. He carried the lad upstairs and grabbed a cushion from one of the couches and a blanket before taking Niall into the storage room.

“Alright” Liam said setting the cushion down before putting Niall on top of it, “You stay here, don’t move. Here” Liam started wrapping the blanket around Niall’s torso, “it’s a little chilly in this room”

Niall waited patiently as Liam adjusted the blanket until he was satisfied knowing full well that he’d take it off the second Liam was out of the room. Really as nice as the attention was Liam could be tiring what with the constant obsessiveness. Still though it didn’t take much longer before Liam was finally heading for the door.

“I’ll be back in half an hour” Liam said, “I’ll be right outside the door if you need me” he added as he reluctantly left Niall alone.

Niall sighed and removed the blanket then took out his headphones, i-pod and composition book. It felt so nice to have time to clear his head; think things through. One of the biggest questions Niall was faced with was what was going to happen tomorrow.

Liam and Zayn had both shown that they cared yes however Niall wasn’t sure he could trust them. Both of them had been the ones that Niall was closest to before all of this. Before the age play Liam was always checking on Niall’s eating habits, his sleeping habits, whether he was hurt or sick. It had been annoying but Niall had liked the care. Zayn had always been the one to cuddle Niall close when he became scared and make sure that he didn’t get lost in the crowds or mobbed by overexcited fans. Once the age play started they were the ones whom Niall would go to if he needed something and they were the ones who took made sure he was there at signings and shows and rehersals after they had forgotten about him.

Come tomorrow, when everything went back to normal, it would hurt the most when Liam and Zayn forgot about him again. Still as much as he tired he couldn’t deny himself the luxury of their attention and comfort, he’d been denied it for so long. He’d been denied comfort of any kind for most of his life. Once his thirty minutes were up all Niall wanted to do was sit with the two of them for the rest of the day curled up on the couch together watching movies. Maybe throw in some fruit and a drink.

Harry and Louis weren’t going to be as big of a deal. Yes Niall knew that they were trying to apologize but they’d never actually said it. They’d never admitted to any wrongdoing they just acted like it had never happened and Niall didn’t like that. Really he wouldn’t miss having to ‘play’ with them (they pretty much tried to engage Niall while the lad just sat and stared sometimes picking up a few pieces to amuse himself on his own). Niall would much rather spend that time with Liam and Zayn anyway.

“Time’s up” Liam said breaking Niall from his thoughts as he came over and picked the boy up holding him close.

Niall just dropped his things knowing that Liam wouldn’t set him down anytime soon. For some reason Niall’s alone time really seemed to stress Liam out and the older lad probably hadn’t been too upset that Niall hadn’t had any over the past three days while he was sick.

“So, what would you like to do now?” Liam asked as he carried Niall down to the TV room.

Niall thought a moment, “Movie” he said eventually.

“Absolutely” Liam agreed as he placed Niall in Zayn’s lap and pulled out the next Disney movie in the pile.

Niall sat back into Zayn happily as he waited for the movie to start, unknowingly slipping his thumb towards his mouth. Zayn caught Niall’s thumb and pressed a dummy to the lad’s lips. Niall looked down at what Zayn had and then turned his head away. He was not a baby and he didn’t want a dummy. How was he supposed to try to get the boys to see reason if he acted more and more like a baby?

“It’s alright Ni, just take it” Zayn tried to coax but Niall was steadfast, he wouldn’t accept the dummy.

Zayn sighed but put the dummy to the side and brought Niall closer as Liam joined them on the couch. The three of them watched the movie for half an hour (Harry and Louis having chosen to watch with them) when Niall started shifting a little bit.

“What’s up love?” Liam asked as he paused the movie.

Niall debated with himself, other than his screaming session a couple of days ago he hadn’t said anything in front of Harry and Louis but still, he was thirst and he wanted some grapes. “Drink”

“You want a drink?” Zayn asked happy to hear Niall speak openly.

Niall nodded his head.

“Any particular kind?” Liam questioned.

“Soda” Niall answered quickly, flasing a hopeful smile.

Zayn chuckled but Liam shot him down. Liam didn’t think all that sugar was good for Niall and he wasn’t thrilled that Zayn gave it to him at all. “How about some apple juice?” he offered.

Niall sighed but nodded his head in agreement anyway, he knew the soda would be a long shot. He watched as Liam stood up and couldn’t help it when he grabbed Liam’s arm.

Liam turned around curiously, “Is there something else?”

Niall licked his lips, he didn’t want to push it but he wanted a snack.

“It’s all right baby, you’ll never be in trouble for asking, I promise” Zayn assured.

Niall bit his lip before asking quietly, “grapes?”

Liam smiled, Niall was asking for food! “Absolutely. I’ll be right back”

True to his word Liam came back less than five minutes later with a bottle of apple juice and a small bowl of grapes for his baby. Niall happily accepted his treat as the movie resumed.

Once the movie was over Liam fed Niall a light supper (well light for others but quite a lot to Niall) before taking his temperature for the last time.

“Alright then baby, looks like you’re free and clear” Liam said as he finished checking the reading on the thermometer and then putting it away, “really Zayn?” he asked when he saw what Niall was drinking.

Niall was elated. Zayn had given him a root beer; it was his favorite! And Zayn had given him a full bottle of it not just a little bit! The only hindrance he faced at the moment was that Zayn wouldn’t let go of the bottom of the bottle, which slowed his drinking.

Zayn just smirked at Liam, “I thought he deserved a special treat seeing as how the evil thermometer is finally being put away”

“You’re spoiling him a bit don’t you think?”

“He’s fine” Zayn responded as he stood up and took Niall piggy back up the stairs, "It's bath time"

Zayn filled the tub as Niall finished his bottle and then undressed the lad.

Niall loved his bath; Zayn had even given him the duck and played with him. He really had to admit that bath time was one of his favorite parts of the day. He stayed in for as long as Zayn would allow.

 

After his bath he was dressed for bed and then they watched a movie until he was out. At some point during the night they arrived at their destination while everyone was asleep.


	13. Interviews and Rehearsals

Liam was started awake by an ear-piercing scream. Immediately he was out of his bunk and lowering the bars of the cot. Niall was lying there thrashing about and tears were running down his face. Liam didn’t hesitate to lift the boy out and hold him close. “Ni, baby, wake up bud” he tried.

“Come on NiNi wake up for me” Zayn begged as he started rubbing Niall’s back.

“What’s wrong with him?” Harry asked joining the group; he and Louis had fallen asleep downstairs on the couch.

“He’s having a nightmare” Zayn informed them as Liam kept trying to wake the baby up. Eventually Zayn got Harry and Louis to go back downstairs and let he and Liam handle things. Zayn wasn’t trying to be mean but he knew that Niall was uncomfortable around the other boys and he just wanted his baby to calm down.

It took five very stressful minutes before Niall was finally awake and by then Zayn and Liam felt as though they’d been punched in the gut. Niall had been begging and screaming while he was still asleep. As far as Liam and Zayn could tell Niall was dreaming of his mother, his father and them. Their baby was literally begging not to be forgotten again and it tore them up. They had done this to Niall, they had caused this fear and dread, they had screwed things up and it was their baby boy who was paying the price.

“Hey baby” Zayn cooed when Niall finally opened his eyes.

Niall was nervous, confused and scared. His dream had petrified him, he knew that the boys would forget him once the tour started up again; he knows it still. The thing is that he had never been bothered by people forgetting him before he’d been become apart of this band. Why was it so hard for him now? Why did it bother him so much that he’d soon have to go back to hiding away in the corner of the storage room again, although this time he would take himself out of the age play no matter what any of the older boys said. He’d do it now if he weren’t being hovered over so much.

Liam and Zayn were worried and heartbroken. They were trying to calm Niall down but the boy was still crying and clinging to Liam as though his life depended on it.

“I thought he was beginning to trust us” Zayn said sadly.

Liam sighed, “He is”

“Then why is he worried?”

“Zayn, we’ve ignored him for over a month that can’t be fixed in four days. Niall has been abandoned and ignored all his life and all we did was repeat the cycle”

“I know but I just wish he would trust us”

“We’ll get there” Liam promised as he turned his attention to the baby in his arms who was finally calming down.

Niall had tired himself out and he was finding himself very confortable pressed up against a warm chest and being rocked slowly. He sighed in slight content as he leaned further into Liam and closed his eyes, just for a second.

Zayn watched as his little one started to fall asleep again. “And he says he doesn’t need a dummy” he commented as he watched Niall’s thumb creep closer to his mouth.

“I put an extra one by his cot in case he needed it” Liam said as he started to stop Niall’s thumb from making it into his mouth, wouldn’t want to undo the work the braces did.

“Got it” Zayn said happily coming over and popping it into Niall’s mouth, “I don’t see why he fights it”

“He’s trying to prove that he isn’t a baby” Liam said as he laid Niall back down in his cot and tucked him back in.

Zayn scoffed, “He’ll always be our baby”

“Agreed. Now get some sleep we have an early start in the morning”

 

Paul came onto the bus at 5:30 that morning finding Harry and Louis asleep on the couches downstairs with the TV still going. “Time to get up” he called startling them both as he headed up the stairs to check on the other three.

“Up and atom” Paul said happily as he started tapping on the side of Liam’s bunk.

“What’s going on?” Niall asked as he woke up, shooting an annoyed and confused look at the dummy lying by his pillow.

Paul smiled as he saw Niall’s blond hair poking up out of the sides of his cot. “Hey there Nialler” he said as he ruffled the sleepy boy’s hair.

“Hey Paul” Niall greeted as he woke up a bit more.

“Morning baby” Zayn said as he pulled Niall out of his cot, “Your nappy wet?”

Niall flushed deep red. While Paul did know about the age play it still felt weird and embarrassing when the others asked these things in front of Paul.

“Niall?” Liam asked coming to stand in front of Niall and placing his hand to the baby’s forehead.

“He’s not sick Liam” Zayn said shaking his head and walking towards the bathroom, “He’s just a little embarrassed”

“So sorry for being concerned” Liam called after the two as they went out of sight.

“We’re leaving in thirty minutes” Paul informed Liam before he walked off and left the boys to get ready.

“Liam got dressed and went downstairs to find Harry fixing a quick breakfast while Louis headed up to pack what they would need for the hotel for the next few days.

Zayn came downstairs ten minutes later with a still sleepy Niall in his arms. “Here’s the little one” Zayn called happily as he strapped Niall into his highchair.

“Hey baby” Louis said five minutes later as he came back in.

Niall just looked up at him, he still had absolutely no desire to talk to either him or Harry.

“Open up little man” Liam instructed as he brought another spoonful of oatmeal up to Niall’s mouth.

Niall looked down at the oatmeal Liam was offering him and then back to his tray. His breakfast consisted of oatmeal and a fruit mix, he wanted the fruit. Ignoring the spoon being offered him Niall reached out for a piece of watermelon in front of him instead.

Liam watched what Niall was doing curiously before he understood. “Silly boy” he chuckled as he took the fork and picked up the watermelon offering it to Niall instead, “All you had to do was ask baby”

Niall ignored the baby comment and ate the watermelon. Yes he would have preferred to feed himself but at least he was getting what he wanted.

“Let’s go” Paul yelled coming onto the bus and grabbing the bags that Louis had set out by the door.

Liam cleared Niall’s tray and Zayn came over and carried him to the car where Paul was waiting with the rest of their bodyguards.

The boys got out at the studio ten minutes later, they had an interview to do that morning and then they were going straight to rehearsals. The good news was that they would have a three-hour break between rehearsals and their concert.

The interview went well, all of the boys were happy to see a happy, vibrant Niall but it was obvious to Liam and Zayn that it was all an act. The sad thing was Niall had Louis and Harry fooled. It wasn’t until they were changing for rehearsals that they learned otherwise.

Liam had just taken Niall to a back room so he could get the boy to use his nappy before rehearsals. And Zayn, Harry and Louis were all getting dressed.

“It was nice seeing the old Niall back” Harry commented.

“Yeah, I’ve missed seeing him so happy” Louis agreed.

Zayn shot them a confused look, “That wasn’t Niall”

“What are you talking about?” Harry asked.

“Niall was smiling and laughing and joking all throughout the interview,” Louis said.

Zayn sighed, he could see that these two still had a ways to go, “Niall was acting guys”

“Acting?” Both Louis and Harry asked together.

“Niall can’t act Z” Louis informed him.

“Niall is the best actor of us all” Zayn corrected, “I mean he’s had a lot of practice after all”

“What practice?” Harry asked.

“His entire childhood” Zayn responded before shushing the boys as he saw Niall and Liam returning. “Hey there baby boy” Zayn smiled as he walked over and took Niall from Liam’s arms, “Bet you feel better huh?”

Niall looked down shyly but shook his head. He still held it in as long as he could, didn’t really see the point in stopping seeing as he truly believed that he would be forgotten again starting today. The fact that Liam and Zayn were still obsessing over him was completely baffling in Niall’s mind. No one had ever remembered Niall before, sure his father or Greg would think of him once in a while and give him some food or an old shirt that they didn’t want anymore but otherwise nothing. Why were these two still trying?

“Lets go boys” Paul called herding them out of the room. Zayn set Niall down and then it was time for rehearsals.

Two and a half hours later and all the boys were done and cleaning up. Louis and Harry had decided to shower at the studio while Liam and Zayn took Niall back to the hotel so that they could give him a bath.

Niall was set down on the toilet as Zayn started filling the tub. The bath looked larger than the one on the bus and it had jets, which meant it would keep the water warmer for longer however there were a few things missing. “Bubbles?”

Zayn looked over at Niall, “Liam’s getting them love,” he promised. Zayn had asked Paul to pick up some bubble bath as well as a few toys. He had noted that Niall had really liked playing with the duck and thought it would be fun for the boy to have some real bath toys to play with.

“What is Liam getting?” said man asked as he strode into the room with a bag in his hand.

Niall brightened when he saw the desired item sticking out of the top of the bag, “Bubbles!” he shrieked.

“Bubbles!” Zayn mimicked happily as he started undressed the lad and Liam poured in the all-important bubbles.

Niall sat and played with the bubbles while Zayn and Liam washed him, completely content to enjoy what he had. The duck had been nice but he wasn’t stupid enough to expect it again. Niall had learned to never get his hopes up and he knew he had been pushing it with the bubbles – he didn’t want to push further and risk losing what he had.

“I got a surprise for you baby” Liam said happily.

Niall looked over curious, what could Liam have? Liam and Zayn had already given Niall more than he’d ever expected what more could there possibly be? When he saw the boats and the basketball hoop he was amazed. Niall didn’t even remember to say thank you, he just grabbed the items and started playing.

Liam and Zayn chuckled as they watched their baby play, it was nice to see a real smile on his face.

“Why don’t you stay while I shower and then we’ll switch?” Liam offered.

“Agreed but once I’m done he has to come out”

“Fair enough” Liam shrugged as he stood up and headed to the other bathroom in their suite.

 

Paul had booked the boys a large suite with an outer room that had a small kitchen, dining table, living room with two couches and a large screen TV and then a small open space by the floor to ceiling window. Liam had Paul bring up Niall’s travel highchair (this one was currently strapped to a dining room chair) and then about ten toys so that the baby would have something to do when they had down time. There was also three bedrooms with Harry having one Louis another and Zayn, Liam and Niall all sharing. Zayn and Liam had refused to leave Niall alone after his nightmare the other night. Liam was grateful that he had thought ahead to buy a travel adult-sized playpen and a mattress that they could put on the bottom of it so Niall would still have a cot even when they were in the hotels. Niall’s travel cot was currently placed between the two beds where both older boys would have easy access to their little one.


	14. Screaming

Harry and Louis returned to the hotel with take away right as Zayn and Liam were taking a pouting Niall out of the bathroom.

“You can have another bath later baby” Zayn assured. Who knew Niall’s favorite time of the day would be bath time.

“Not cold” Niall argued for the tenth time since being pulled out.

“You were in there for thirty minutes, you need to eat then it’s naptime” Liam said effectively ending the argument as he strapped Niall into his seat.

Niall crossed his arms but dropped the subject knowing it would do him no good. Well at least lunch looked good; Nandos! Niall reached out to grab his food only to have Liam lightly slap his hand away.

“You know the drill baby,” Liam scolded slightly.

“Here” Zayn said taking over, “Open wide”

Niall sighed but did as instructed. He couldn’t help but notice how everyone in the room was staring at him as Zayn fed him. It was embarrassing! He was an adult and here his best mates sat watching him.

Lunch was a quiet and quick affair, everyone being starving after a long morning. Soon enough Niall was being carried into the room he was to share with Liam and Zayn. “No” he groaned when he saw the cot.

“Now, now, none of that” Liam tutted as he laid Niall down and started pulling the blankets up, “Sleep now baby, I’ll come get you when it’s time to go”

Niall laid there as Liam placed a kiss to his forehead and then left. He turned on his side and tried to do as instructed but it just didn’t work – he couldn’t sleep. Niall was used to music.

Before age play Niall had music on low when he slept or kept headphones in his ears. His cot at home and the one on the bus had mobiles above them and the boys always turned the mobile on when they tucked him in, it played soft tunes while he slept. When Niall slept in the storage room he had his headphones. Even when Niall was taking a bath Zayn would turn on the radio. There was music on the movies they watched, there was music in every show they used it for background noise constantly. There entire job was music, there was constantly music going and Niall craved it, he always had, it was the one thing that had kept him sane when he was trapped in the closet or the basement. His mother had thought that the music was a punishment but Niall had always loved it.

Now Niall wasn’t really sure he could go more than two hours without music of some type and he knew that he definitely couldn’t sleep without music. Unfortunately there was no mobile above the travel cot and Liam hadn’t turned on any before he left.

Liam and Zayn had been asked to meet up with a couple people from management for about half and hour and they were nervous. Liam had just put Niall down for his nap so the lad should sleep the entire time they were gone but still, Niall was his baby. Also neither boy felt comfortable leaving Louis and Harry in charge though they knew it was stupid. Before they had left Liam and Zayn had laid out so many rules and instructions that Harry and Louis honestly thought they were going on overload.

About twenty minutes after Liam and Zayn left Louis decided it would be a good time to go and check on Niall. He didn’t even want to think about the other boys’ reactions if they came back and something had happened to their baby.

“What’s up?” Harry asked curiously as he watched Louis head into the main bedroom.

“Just gonna check on Nialler” Louis called as he carefully opened the door and peeked in, “What are you still doing up?” Louis asked as he saw Niall staring at him.

Niall glared at Louis, he was not the one Niall wanted. Instead of answering him Niall just turned around so that his back was facing Louis.

“Niall” Louis said in warning. He understood that Niall was mad at him and Harry but that didn’t mean he wanted attitude from the boy. Louis and Harry had been doing everything they could to make it up to Niall but the lad just wouldn’t forgive them, he wouldn’t even talk to them! Frankly it was becoming exhausting.

Niall covered his ears with his hands not wanting to hear what Louis had to say. He knew this would annoy Louis but then that was just a bonus in his opinion.

Louis was sick of this, he walked over to the cot and made to life Niall out only to have the boy shove him away, “Niall…”

“No!” Niall screamed, sitting up, “Leave me alone!”

“What’s going on in here?” Harry asked having heard the screaming and coming to investigate.

“Get out!” Niall was completely pissed off, he was sick of these two.

“Ni, what’s going on with you?” Harry asked showing concern.

“Why the hell do you care?” Niall grit out.

“What?” Louis asked confused, “Why wouldn’t we care?”

“You never did before” Niall countered, “Why would you start now?” Because that’s the thing that had really been bugging him, why did they suddenly care? He knew it wasn’t by choice. Liam and Zayn had been by choice, the two of them had been the ones to take care of him since that first morning on the bus, the two of them hadn’t run off to go sight seeing and left him being. Niall had finally forgiven them all for the month and a half of ignoring him at the beginning when things were extremely hectic. The thing is that Louis and Harry had continued to ignore him even after things had calmed down.

Liam and Zayn had taken care of him once things had relaxed; Louis and Harry had gone out sightseeing without giving Niall a single thought. Niall wasn’t important to them so why should they care now?

“We’ve always cared…” Harry started.

“No” Niall cut him off. He was frustrated, and tired and he didn’t like this, “I want my Mum and Dad,” he cried suddenly.

Everyone froze then; no one had expected that to come out of Niall’s mouth. Harry and Louis didn’t know what to say. They tried to calm Niall down but the boy would just start crying harder whenever they came near him. They were trying to call Liam and Zayn when the two boys came barreling into the room.

“Oh baby” Zayn cooed as he grabbed Niall up and held him close as he swayed back and forth.

“What happened?” Liam growled at the other two as he dragged them out of the room.

“I came in to check on Niall and saw that he was awake, I asked him what was wrong but he wouldn’t answer, I went to pick him up and he started yelling” Louis started to explain.

Harry picked up there, “I came in to see what was going on and Niall lost it, started screaming at us asking us why we cared since we didn’t before” Harry lost it there he was crying so hard.

“We do care though, we’ve always cared. Why does he thing we don’t care?” Louis asked crying as well.

Liam sighed, he honestly didn’t know what was going through Niall’s mind or why he had forgiven he and Zayn but still held a grudge against Louis and Harry. “I don’t really know”

“Well it sucks” Harry stated.

“And on top of that he’s calling you and Zayn Mum and Dad while Harry and I are still getting the cold shoulder” Louis added.

“Wait what?” Liam asked jerking his head up.

“He’s still giving us the cold shoulder’ Louis repeated.

“No” Liam grit, he understood their frustration he really did but that was not what he had meant, “The other part”

“Other…” Harry was confused, “Oh. He’s calling you and Zayn Mum and Dad, don’t know which is which though”

Liam couldn’t help the smile that broke out on his face; Niall had called him Dad! Or possibly Mum but still, he had a name! Ignoring Harry and Louis and went straight towards his baby boy. “Hey there”

Niall looked over Zayn’s shoulder at Liam. He hadn’t expected to yell out for them the way he had. Honestly Niall had meant to say that he wanted Zayn and Liam but instead he’d yelled he wanted his Mum and Dad. That had been a mistake but it wasn’t one that he could take back and judging by Liam’s expression he already knew.

“Are we calm now?” Zayn asked as he pulled Niall away slightly to look at the tear stained face.

Niall nodded his head in assent still a bit uncertain.

“Want to tell us why you couldn’t sleep?” Liam asked as he started rubbing circles on Niall’s back. He could tell the moment Niall saw him that he was nervous about what he’d said so Liam decided to just let it be and they could discuss it later.

Niall lowered his head a bit, “Too quiet” he said.

“Too quiet?” Zayn asked a bit confused.

“Can you be a little more specific?” Liam asked.

Niall sighed, “No music”

“Oh” Both Zayn and Liam said finally getting it.

“Well I think we can fix that” Liam said happily as he pulled out his i-pod and a small speaker, it would do in a pinch. At least he’d had the foresight to load a few children’s CD’s and lullabies on it. Hitting play he gave Niall one last kiss as Zayn tucked him into his cot.

“Sleep well baby” Zayn said as they left the room.

Niall sighed in contentment as he finally got to take his nap.

“So what happened?” Zayn asked as soon as the door was shut.

 

“Niall called us Mum and Dad” Liam answered smiling.


	15. Apologize?

While Liam and Zayn wanted nothing more than to celebrate that Niall was actually calling them Mum and Dad (also debate who was Mum and who was Dad) but they had to deal with Louis and Harry first.

“Let’s sit and talk” Liam suggested as he gestured to the couch.

Everyone sat in silence for a few moments each trying to collect their thoughts. Liam and Zayn were trying to process how they were going to explain things to the other two. Harry and Louis trying to figure out where they’d gone wrong, what Liam and Zayn had figured out that they hadn’t? Also Harry and Louis were jealous and they were trying to put that aside.

“Why does he hate us?” Louis asked breaking the silence.

Zayn sighed, “He doesn’t hate you. He just doesn’t trust you”

“But why?” Harry asked, “We’ve been trying everything we can think of to fix this, to make him realize that we’re sorry but it just isn’t working”

“Did you actually tell him that?” Liam asked.

“Tell him what?” Louis asked confused.

“That you were sorry” Zayn answered.

Harry paused, had they? “Of course we did… didn’t we?”

“I… I’m not sure” Louis replied.

Liam sighed and sat back, “He won’t forgive you if you don’t apologize. Why should he?”

“But we’ve shown him that we’re sorry, that we care!” Harry exclaimed getting frustrated. Why did it matter that they hadn’t exactly said the words ‘I’m sorry’ when they had been rather obvious about it. Why was it necessary to say it when he’d shown it?

“And how have you shown that you’re sorry?” Liam questioned.

“We bought him all those toys and movies” Louis said.

“And we’ve brought Nandos” Harry added.

“We’ve been playing with him”

“We’ve tried to feed him – though he won’t let us” Harry grumbled.

“So you’ve been trying to buy him off?” Liam surmised.

“NO!” both Harry and Louis shouted at once.

Zayn scoffed, “That’s exactly what you’ve been doing”

“We have not been buying him off!” Harry exclaimed in outrage.

“You’ve been giving him nice things and trying to pamper him because you want him to forgive you rather than just apologizing?” Liam asked, “And how is that not trying to buy him off?”

“Well…” Louis stalled.

“It would work for me” Harry defended.

“And I’ve already told you that Niall has had a shit childhood. He has been abused, ignored, abandoned and then thrown out to live on his own with nothing. You really thing buying him a few nice things and smiling was going to get you on his good side?” Zayn asked.

Louis and Harry looked down; they were completely ashamed. They hadn’t thought about Niall’s past or what affect it would have on the lad after what they’d done to him. To say they were idiots would be an understatement.

“We didn’t think of it that way” Louis finally admitted.

“Yeah, we can tell” Liam agreed.

Zayn shot Liam a disapproving look, he knew that Harry and Louis were trying their best they just didn’t understand how to handle Niall. Granted they’d never asked either, “You need to actually talk to him, apologize to him”

“Is that what you guys did?” Harry asked.

Zayn and Liam both nodded, “Yeah”

“How?” Louis wondered.

Liam sighed, “I apologized that first day, while I was giving Niall his evening bath. I said I was sorry and promised him that it would never happen again”

“I apologized the second day, after he’d woken up from his nap. I told him that I would take it back if I could and that nothing could make it better but I promised that I’d never let it happen again” Zayn said.

“So we need to apologize then promise to never let it happen again?” Harry asked.

“Apologize yes but don’t promise anything unless you know you can come through” Liam said sternly.

“If you promise something and then screw it up, no matter how small, Niall will never trust you again” Zayn added.

Harry and Louis looked to each other in fear, this was a lot more serious than they had ever imagined. Could they do this? Take care of Niall properly? Sure it was fun to hang out with the boy even before the age play started they always enjoyed playing with Niall but never had they actually had to properly take care of the lad. With a past like Niall’s could they do it? Should they start something that they weren’t sure they could finish? If they screwed up it would only hurt Niall so much more and they would never be able to forgive themselves.

“I’m not sure…” Harry started but he couldn’t finish.

Liam and Zayn could see that the other two boys were scared, they should be. Taking care of Niall was no light task, their baby was too important. Still they didn’t want to alienate Harry and Louis from Niall, that wouldn’t help anything either.

Liam sighed, “How about you two just try to be good… older brothers?” he offered.

“Older brothers?” Louis exclaimed, “We’re not doing this age play thing too”

“You can forget it” Harry threw in annoyed as well. They may have forgotten Niall yes and that was horrible but they had still managed to take care of themselves just fine and neither were willing to give that up.

“No” Zayn explained, “More like… Uncles”

“Oh” Harry said in understanding.

“I think we could do that” Louis nodded in agreement.

“Good” Liam said slapping his knee for emphasis, “So now that we have that issue solved I vote we move onto the more important business”

“And what’s that?” Harry asked confused.

“Niall called us Mum and Dad!” Zayn answered happily.

“Hm…” Louis said, “And which of you is which?”

“I’m Dad” both Liam and Zayn answered at once.

Everyone burst out laughing; it was a great way of breaking the tension. Still though, all of them were curious – who was who?

“I think that Liam is the Dad and Zayn is the Mum” Louis said.

“Hey!” Zayn exclaimed, “Why am I the Mum?”

“Because of your pretty hair” Liam teased while reaching out to pull it.

Zayn jerked out of Liam’s grasp, “Touch my hair and I’ll break your finger”

“I think Louis’ got it wrong” Harry said throwing in his two cents.

“Thank you” Zayn said.

“Oh and how do you see it?” Liam questioned.

“I think that Liam is the Mum and Zayn is the Dad” Harry shrugged.

“What?!” Liam asked, “How am I possibly the Mum?”

“Because you’re insanely over protective” Zayn said.

“I am not” Liam argued.

All three scoffed, “You’re worse than my own Mum” Louis said.

“Never seen anyone worse than you” Harry added.

 

“I can’t believe the lengths you’ve gone too” Zayn threw in.

___________________________________

So who should be Mum and who should be Dad?


	16. Who's Who?

The four of them sat and argued out who was who for the next half hour. Nothing was really decided but they Louis almost pissed himself he was laughing so hard.

All in all it was a draw so Liam being the ever sensible one stood up, “You know what. I know the perfect way to get the answer”

“And how’s that then?” Zayn questioned.

Liam smirked as he started heading towards his bedroom, “I’ll just ask the baby”

“Well if you’re going to use the short cut” Louis grumbled.

“Cheater” Harry called over his shoulder as Liam disappeared into the room.

“I can’t wait for the answer” Zayn said happily.

Liam walked into the bedroom and turned off the music before starting to rub slow circles on Niall’s back. It took a few moments before Niall’s eyes fluttered open.

“No” Niall groaned as he started to turn away.

“Sorry baby” Liam chuckled as he scooped Niall up and checked his nappy, “Let’s get you changed and then we’ll go see the others”

Niall wasn’t happy with being plucked from his nice warm bed but knew that he actually had to get up; they had a concert tonight. Still, why make things easy on Liam.

“Hey, no kicking now” Liam scolded lightly as he grasped Niall’s flailing legs; holding them still as he finished changing his baby and then placed Niall on his hip, “All done” he cooed as he walked out to the sitting room.

“Hey baby, come here” Zayn said opening his arms for his little boy.

Niall snuggled into Zayn contentedly still upset over his argument with Louis and Harry earlier.

“Niall, baby” Harry said softly as he and Louis came to crouch in front of Niall.

Niall turned his head into Zayn’s shoulder wanting nothing to do with the two boys.

Louis was hurt with Niall’s reaction, he truly wished he could fix this with a simple gift or word but things just weren’t that simple, “Oh baby, we’re so sorry”

“Honestly Ni, we never meant to hurt you” Harry added.

Niall still kept his head hidden in Zayn, he didn’t really want to hear their apologies they were meaningless and forced. He was willing to bed Liam and Zayn told them to do this.

“NiNi, why won’t you look at them?” Zayn asked curiously.

Niall did feel the need to answer Zayn; “They don’t care”

“We do care!” Harry said a bit more forcefully than was completely necessary.

Niall scoffed finally turning to look at the two crouching in front of him, “They made you” he sneered.

“No one made us do anything” Louis insisted.

“No one can make us do anything” Harry stated.

Niall just rolled his eyes, “Liam is the one in charge, what he says goes”

“Niall,“ Liam said, waiting to speak again until he had the boy’s full attention, “I promise you I have made them do nothing.”

Niall looked skeptically at Liam. Every promise that Liam had made to him so far he’d kept but those were all little promises. This was a bigger promise, at least in Niall’s opinion, could he trust him with this?

“We haven’t been going about this the right way but we’ve been trying to apologize for a while now” Harry said getting Niall’s attention.

Louis took it as encouragement that Niall was looking at them while they were speaking, “We’ve been trying to buy your forgiveness when we should have talked to you and that’s our mistake”

“One of many” Harry continued, “And we can’t begin to tell you how sorry we are. We know that no matter what we say can’t make up for what we’ve done and we don’t expect you to forgive us lightly but we will do whatever we can to earn your trust back”

“We won’t fail you again” Louis finished the apology. Both boys had avoided the word ‘promise’ because they had seen exactly what effect that word had on Niall when Liam had said it and the last thing they wanted was to screw that up.

Niall listened to what they had to say. He wanted to believe them he did but still they had burned him too many times already and he just wasn’t ready to get hurt again. He didn’t know if he could handle it.

Harry and Louis just accepted Niall’s silence knowing that the boy would open up to them in his own time (hoping really because they didn’t know anything).

After a few minutes of awkward silence during which Louis and Harry moved to sit on the other couch while Zayn, Liam and Niall curled up on theirs, Liam just couldn’t stand it anymore.

“Alright I have one very important question for you baby” Liam said turning both himself and Niall so that they were facing each other.

“OK…” Niall said confused. What could Liam want? What would Niall know that Liam was curious about?

Liam drew in a deep breath before asking, “Am I Mum or Dad?”

Niall blushed furiously, that had been the last thing he’d was expecting. Embarrassed, Niall diverted his attention to other areas of the room only to find that all of the boys were watching him intently. Guess they all wanted to know but why? Were they just waiting for the answer so that they’d have confirmation? If so what would they do to him? “I’m sorry” he blurted out before he could stop himself.

Everyone was confused, “What are you sorry for baby?” Zayn asked.

Crap, Niall was screwed. His own mother and father hadn’t liked him calling them... acknowledging their relationship – he still had nightmares about the punishments he’d received from doing so. Liam and Zayn would be even more upset because neither one of them were his parents, they were his band mates. “I didn’t mean to” he apologized hoping to stave off a punishment.

“Sweetheart, what had you so worried huh?” Liam asked as he reached over and ran his hand through Niall’s hair, taking note of how the boy tensed at his touch.

Niall was terrified, he had broken the biggest rule, the worst one, he’d really screwed this up. “Please, I’m sorry I won’t do it again”

Liam and Zayn shared a concerned look over Niall’s head; this hadn’t been the reaction that they were expecting. It only went to show how bad Niall’s childhood must have been.

“Ni, baby” Liam started, “We’re not mad at you”

“I’m so happy that you called us Mum and Dad” Zayn continued, squeezing Niall close and started to rock a little, “I cant’ tell you how excited I am”

Niall was confused, “I’m not s’posed to say that”

“Say what buddy?” Liam asked.

Niall looked up worriedly, “Mum and Dad” he whimpered.

“Oh honey” Zayn sighed as he rested his head atop of Niall’s, “I would love for you to call me that”

“Which?” Niall asked hesitantly. He knew which one he had dubbed Mum and which he had named Dad but if they didn’t like it he would change his choices.

“Sorry bud that’s up to you” Liam said resting a hand on Niall’s knee.

Niall sighed, he wasn’t sure he liked that, “What if I’m wrong?”

Liam pulled Niall out of Zayn’s hold enough to turn the lad to face him once again, “You could never get it wrong baby” he assured, “Zayn and I will love whatever you want to call us I promise”

“We both promise” Zayn added.

Niall looked between the two of them for a few moments debating if he should answer them. They had promised that they’d be OK with whatever he said. Well here goes nothing, “Dad” he said pointing to Zayn, “Mum” he said pointing to Liam.

“I knew it!” Harry exclaimed happily jumping up from his seat on the couch and pumping his fist in the air.

“I’m Mum” Liam said happily ruffling Niall’s hair and then leaning back a little.

“And I’m Dad” Zayn said smiling as he pulled his baby close and rubbed his back.

Before the boys could say anything else Paul was knocking on their door before coming in and informing them that it was time to head out to the concert. All the boys got up excitedly and headed to their concert.

It was late by the time they all got back to the hotel. Liam fed Niall a quick meal to tide the lad over until morning and then handed him off to Zayn. As fun as concerts were they were also exhausting and left all the boys tired and sweaty by the end.

“Now” Zayn said as he sat Niall on the toilet seat and started filling the tub, “This is just going to be a quick bath, to wash all the sweat off of you and then it’ll be time for your bottle and bed”

“Bubbles” Niall requested.

“No baby, this is just a wash and go”

“Bubbles” Niall said again.

“No Niall” Zayn said.

“Bubbles!” Niall demanded.

Zayn turned off the taps and turned to his boy, “Niall, it’s late and you’re not getting bubbles” he stated firmly as he placed the lad in the tub.

Niall was upset, he wanted his bubbles and he wanted his toys. He was in the tub; the tub meant fun. Seeing his boats Niall started reaching out for them.

Zayn sighed; Liam had warned him that this wouldn’t be easy, “No Niall” he said as he plucked the toys out of Niall’s hands and put them out of the lad’s reach.

“Urrr!” Niall screamed in frustration. Zayn was taking away all his fun! In retaliation Niall started kicking and squirming working to get out of Zayn’s grip. He didn’t want to be bathed he wanted to play, and he wanted his bubbles!

“Niall” Zayn said in warning but the boy wasn’t listening. Knowing what he had to do but not wanting to Zayn let the little tantrum go on for slightly longer than he should before lifting Niall up slightly and smacking his bum three times.

“Ow” Niall gasped as Zayn sat him back down.

“I’m not doing this Niall. We’re almost done here and then it’s bedtime” Zayn explained as he resumed his task. Zayn made a mental note, on concert days it might be best to make Niall take a longer than normal nap – a sleepy baby was a cranky baby.

It didn’t take but ten more minutes to have Niall out of the tub and dressed in a fresh nappy and a footed onesie. Zayn couldn’t help but think that his baby looked so adorable! “One squeaky clean baby ready for his bottle” Zayn called as he handed Niall over to Liam.

“Did your Daddy give you a nice bath love?” Liam asked.

Niall crossed his arms and pouted, it had not been a nice bath it had been a boring one.

“Someone get’s cranky when they’re tired” Zayn informed Liam as he went to take his own shower.

“Oh” Liam said in understanding, “Give Daddy a hard time then did you?”

Niall looked away and shrugged slightly, “No bubbles” he said in way of explanation.

“You had bubbles earlier baby. You only get one bath with bubbles a day” Liam said as he cradled Niall and brought the bottle of warm milk up to his baby’s mouth.

 

Niall grumbled at the new ruling but accepted the bottle nonetheless; he was thirsty. He sucked down the liquid quickly and soon enough he was being lowered into his cot while his Mum and Dad were tucking him in for the night and soft music was playing in the background. This was good. But when would it end?


	17. What Nightmares Can Cause

Niall woke up screaming for the tenth night in a row. He was pressed up against a warm chest and someone was rocking him back and forth and another person was continuously rubbing large circles on his back. Up until this point it had been comforting but these stupid nightmares weren’t going away.

After their first day back on tour Niall had wanted to fool himself into believing that his Mum and Dad… Liam and Zayn would actually keep their promise, that they would never forget him again. He had even begun to wonder if Louis and Harry had meant their apology, he wasn’t even scowling at them whenever they were near anymore and had even verbally answered a few yes or no questions. That was nine days and two countries ago.

They arrived at their current country yesterday and had performed their first concert last night. Today was a simple enough day, they had an early concert and that was it. His Mum and Da… Liam and Zayn had put him to bed as soon as he’d had his bottle last night. He now had a travel cot (his old playpen having been set to the side in storage) which was much more comfortable and had a mobile above it – his Mu… Liam’s doing. Niall sighed; he really needed to stop thinking of Liam and Zayn as Mum and Dad. It was becoming more and more of a habit lately and it had to stop.

“Baby, you OK?” Da… Zayn asked as he pushed Niall back a bit in his hold to get a better look at the lad.

Niall thought over the question. Was he OK? NO! However right now he wanted to be alone with his thoughts and if he were to be honest he wouldn’t be allowed to sleep until he ‘felt all better’ – he’d been through this too many times to count by this point. “Yes” he mumbled eventually.

Zayn and Liam shared a look over Niall’s head, they both knew that Niall was lying but they’d been trying and had yet to get the boy to actually tell them what’s wrong. They’d been begging Niall for days to tell them what his nightmares were about – sure they could guess a few things but as they got worse Niall’s begging died down and his screaming increased. These past few nights Niall hadn’t said anything to indicate what was wrong but he had screamed bloody murder, it broke their hearts.

Zayn and Liam tried for a little while longer but eventually had to give in and place Niall back in his cot. If Niall wouldn’t talk then they weren’t sure how to help him. They had been debating on asking Paul or Simon for help but had been wanting to figure it out for themselves; after all he was their baby.

Niall was grateful when he was finally placed back in the cot, wanting to spend some time alone with his thoughts. He waited until Liam had climbed into the bed on his right and Zayn the bed on his left before opening his eyes as he started to dissect his dream.

Niall’s nightmares have all been the same, just getting progressively worse. At first he dreamed of his entire family, his mother, his father, Greg and what they had all done to him and what the boys had done seemed to pale in comparison. As the nights went on though his dreams kept changing, focusing, on the boys and more specifically Zayn and Liam.

As much as Niall loved getting the cuddles and the attention he knew that it would all come to an end. It always came to an end. Nothing good ever lasted, not for Niall. Niall was the one who got beaten unconscious and then locked in the hall closet when he was four. Niall was the one whose mother thought it would be funny to interrogate with electrocution for over an hour over something he knew nothing about on his seventh birthday (unconsciousness was once again his saving factor). Niall was the one who was made to live in the shed in his father’s backyard that was smaller than a prison cell. That shed had been freezing in the winter, Niall almost died a few times because the temperature had dropped so low. No, whatever Zayn and Liam said they would forget about him, leave him along again to fend for himself. Why shouldn’t they; everyone else has.

Niall laid there realizing that he had allowed himself to become far too close to Zayn and Liam, far too dependent on their attention and care over these past few days and it wasn’t safe. He knew that when they went back on their promises it would crush him. Niall wasn’t sure he’d survive such a rejection from the two whom he had come closest two in all his life. Niall couldn’t allow Liam and Zayn to leave him not again, this time he would be the one to leave (not the band though, he did love the job).

His decision made Niall checked to make sure that Liam and Zayn were asleep before standing up. The travel cot was easier to get out of than the one on the bus. The bars only came up to about the lower middle of his chest and there were two latches, one on each side and they weren’t locked. Niall eased the latches open one at a time and then gently slid down the railing. Niall slipped out of the cot and searched around for his bag. He grabbed some clothes from his duffle before edging out of the room making sure not to wake his two overbearing band mates.

Niall sighed in relief as he shut the door to the spare restroom. He knew that he wasn’t actually allowed to take off his nappy or get out of his cot without permission but he didn’t really care. Niall knew that he would be forgotten soon enough and when that happened he had planned to end the age play on his own. Since he was doing the leaving this time he decided that he’d also take himself out of age play. He didn’t want to have to rely on anyone.

Niall chucked his soiled nappy into the bin (still upset that he wet himself in his sleep) and took off the footed onesie the boys had put him in. He couldn’t say how good it felt to put on regular clothes himself, especially without having that stupid nappy on underneath. Sighing in relief he headed out into the main room and turned on the game system loading up FIFA.

“Finally” Niall said to himself as he relaxed back into the couch with controller in hand. It had been far too long since he’d played a video game on any kind. He should have done this a while ago.

Liam stirred from his light sleep when he heard strange sounds coming from the living room. Grumbling Liam rolled over deciding that he should probably go and tell Louis and/or Harry to turn down their game or movie because it was only four thirty in the morning and his baby boy needed to sleep.

Out of habit Liam walked over to check on Niall as he headed out of the room only to have his heart stop. Niall wasn’t in his cot!

“Zayn!” Liam called as he started shoving around the blankets and bear in the cot just incase Niall was curled up and hiding (yes irrational but he was worried!).

“What is it?” Zayn asked groggily as he sat up.

“Niall’s missing!”

“What!” Zayn screeched now fully awake and jumping out of bed, checking the cot himself.

“Where is he?” Liam asked.

“I don…” Zayn started but then he heard the noise that had originally awoken Liam, “You’ve got to be kidding”

“What?” Liam asked concerned as Zayn pushed past him and headed straight for the sitting room of the hotel, “NIAL JAMES HORAN!”

Niall whipped his head around in concern. By the look on Zayn’s face Niall could tell that the man was MAD, probably the worst Niall had ever seen him. It took everything he had in him not to burst out in dears and apologize while curling in Zayn’s arms.

Zayn couldn’t believe it! What had gotten into Niall? He thought they had been doing better. Guess he had over estimated how far they had come.

Niall watched in horror as Zayn marched over, turned off the game, and took the controller from Niall’s hand. Niall would have moved but he felt as though he were completely frozen – all that rebellious energy from earlier in the morning suddenly leaving him.

“What do you think you’re doing?” Zayn asked deceptively calm as he stood in front of the boy on the couch.

Niall gulped, why had this seemed like a good idea again?

“I’m waiting” Zayn said impatiently.

Niall was screwed, he knew it, he was completely screwed.

Zayn got sick of waiting and grabbed Niall’s arm, hauling him up and planting three firm swats to the boys backside.

“Ahh” Niall gasped as he tried to squirm out of Zayn’s grasp.

Zayn paused in his swats as he realized that there hadn’t been a lot of padding. Curious and slightly more agitated Zayn grabbed the back of Niall’s trousers and checked to see if his hunch was correct. “And why did you remove your nappy?”

Niall once again started to squirm, desperate to get out of Zayn’s grasp. He wasn’t being hurt, the grasp wasn’t that tight, but it didn’t bode well for him either. Thankfully coming up with some small shred of self preservation and indignation Niall spoke up, “I’ve told you I don’t want to do this anymore”

Seriously? Zayn couldn’t help it, he hadn’t thought that this was once again being brought up. Niall had said something about wanting out of age play just about every other day recently but he had never taken it this far. Naturally Zayn and Liam had stood firm and told Niall time and again that the age play wasn’t an option. Looks like Niall needed a more solid reminder.

“So let me get this straight” Zayn said just for clarification, “You got yourself out of your cot, took off your nappy and onesie, dressed yourself, started playing video games and all of this at four thirty in the morning”

Niall nodded, “I said I didn’t want to do this”

“And we’ve told you that you don’t have a choice in the matter” Liam said firmly coming into the conversation.

“I don’t care” Niall stated, “I’m not doing it any longer”

Zayn sighed internally; this was becoming a pointless conversation. Niall was doing better; everyone could see it. The kid was eating better (still not up to a healthy portion for his age but it was at least half that and three times a day plus snacks). Niall was better rested, smiling more, and more relaxed. This was good for Niall and Zayn really wished the boy would see that.

“This is the last time I’m going to say it Niall” Zayn started, “You. Do. Not. Have. A. Choice”

“It’s my life” Niall growled.

Zayn was done with this conversation. Instead of answering the boy Zayn took Niall over his knee and pulled his trousers down. “You’re receiving ten for getting out of your cot on your own, ten for taking off your nappy, and ten for playing video games without permission while you were supposed to be sleeping”

“No” Niall argued as he struggled to get off of Zayn’s lap. Unfortunately for Niall Zayn was a lot stronger than he was and he didn’t win that fight.

Zayn ignored Niall’s arguing and started. Niall knew why he was being punished and Zayn wasn’t one for lecturing during a spanking.

Niall squirmed at first but stopped fighting soon enough. He was all out bawling by the twentieth smack.

Right after Zayn landed the thirtieth smack and then immediately brought the lad into his lap trying to offer comfort. Only Niall wouldn’t have it.

“This is all to help you love” Zayn said softly.

“It’s not helping” Niall grumbled through his sobs as he tried to push away from Zayn.

“And why is that lovie?” Liam questioned as he sat down next to Niall and started rubbing his knee.

Niall didn’t know why he answered, wasn’t planning on answering at all actually, just running thoughts through his head and apparently not properly filtering his brain to mouth sensor (a rare occurrence for him) “When you leave I’ll break”

Zayn and Liam had to strain to hear Niall; the lad spoke so softly. It broke their hearts really to learn that their baby still didn’t trust them, they thought they had been making such good progress.

“Oh baby, we aren’t going anywhere,” Liam promised as he pulled Niall over into his lap.

Niall squirmed wanting to trust them but too much history getting in his way. Instead of saying anything he merely decided to stay silent but he did allow himself to lean into his M… Liam just a bit.

Liam counted the fact that Niall cuddled into him a bit as a small win but he couldn’t help but wonder what had caused the change? What had happened to Niall that had caused this much of a set back?

“Is that what your nightmares are about baby?” Zayn asked seeming to have already thought this through some.

Niall froze, how had his D… Zayn figured it out so quickly?

“Oh sweetheart” Liam cooed rubbing Niall’s back and taking the lad’s silence for the answer it was.

“Love we’ll never forget about you again” Zayn said.

Niall just shrugged, not really believing him. He just didn’t believe people anymore.

Zayn turned Niall around to face him, knowing that he needed to get somewhere or else they’d end up right back in this same position again all too soon. “Niall, we give you our word that we will never forget about you. You mean more to us than anything else. Your Mum and I love you more than we can ever express.”

“We love you baby boy. You can never be rid of us and you can never stop us from loving you more than anything in the world” Liam continued. He knew he was repeating a lot of what Zayn said but it seemed too important.

Niall stared at Zayn for a few moments showing absolutely nothing, no emotion. Zayn and Liam were concerned, thinking that it hadn’t worked and then suddenly Niall started absolutely sobbing.

Niall wasn’t really sure why he was sobbing so hard and he couldn’t seem to stop. NO ONE had said that they loved him before. Not like that, not really meaning it. Yes it was something that was screamed at them by fans all the time and they would say it casually to each other now and then. What Zayn and Liam had just said was different though – it was so honest and it felt different, nice, wonderful.

Niall just kept sobbing; a part of him knew that it wasn’t all about this talk. A part of him knew that he was just so tired and he couldn’t keep it in. It hurt to keep everything in. If he had cried when his mother was punishing him it only made things worse. If he had cried in front of his father or brother Greg they would literally kick him off the property for two days making him live on the streets – regardless of the weather. Even after starting age play he had cried but not like this. Niall kept everything bottled up kept it inside of him knowing that no one else cared and they didn’t want to hear his worries or concerns. Liam and Zayn seemed to want to know though; they were the only ones who wanted to know.

Zayn and Liam were getting worried, Niall had been crying for thirty minutes straight. Zayn was about to call Paul for help when he noticed that his baby was finally starting to calm down.

“He’s out” Liam whispered over Niall’s head a few minutes later.

The next twenty minutes consisted of Liam and Zayn getting Niall into a new nappy, into a footed onesie and tucked securely into his cot. This time they did put locks on the latches so as to avoid Niall getting out again. Also they turned on the baby monitor so they would know if their baby woke up. Last thing they did before leaving the room was making sure the mobile was turned because it really did seem to help.

“What happened to him as a child?” Liam asked as soon as the door was shut.

“I don’t know” Zayn said, “But he needs to talk about it or it’s going to eat up at him”

“It already is. He needs help with this Z. We can’t do this ourselves”

Zayn shook his head knowing it was the truth but hating that they had to get someone else to help with their own baby, “Alright. I’ll ask Paul later today”

 

“Agreed” Liam sighed as he dropped down on the couch and thought through everything that had just happened.


	18. Resistance

Niall woke up groggily, sighing as he saw he was back in the cot – that hadn’t been part of his plan. Why had they put him back in here? Why had they gotten so mad? Why did they still pretend to care? Niall had been sure that once he had taken himself out of age play that Liam and Zayn would let him alone. It wasn’t as though they actually wanted to do this still, they couldn’t.

As far as Niall could tell Liam and Zayn had only been continuing this whole age-play thing because they felt obligated after being the ones to start it. He had always known that once the tour started up again everyone would go back to ignoring him. He had allowed himself to be fooled these past ten days because he had wanted to believe that they truly cared for him but he knew it was just a fantasy, no one ever cared for Niall.

The fact that they had come looking for him after just a couple of hours had been extremely surprising especially since they should have been asleep at the time. Why had they come for him? Why had they punished him? Why had they put him back in a nappy? Most importantly, why had they said they loved him? And they sounded like they meant it.

Sighing as he realized that he just didn’t understand any of this Niall rolled over onto his back so that he could sit up. The second his bum touched the mattress however he hissed in pain and turned on his side.

Liam heard Niall through the baby monitor and hurried to get him. He was worried about his baby boy and he didn’t want to leave the lad alone for too long incase he tried to pull something like he had earlier that morning.

“Hey baby boy,” Liam cooed as he started to unlock the latches on the cot.

“You locked it?” Niall asked incredulously.

Liam gave Niall a rather tired look; “You let yourself out of your cot”

“I don’t want to be in a cot” Niall replied simply.

Liam sighed, “Niall, this isn’t up to you” he said as he picked the lad up and carried him over to the bed where there was a changing mat laid out. “You wet love?”

Niall squirmed as he was set down on his stomach. Liam had put him in a footed onesie that zipped in the back so that he couldn’t take it off by himself. Soon Niall felt the clothing come off and he was flipped around so that he was lying on his back.

“Ah” Niall gasped as his backside touched the bed. He quickly made to turn on his side but Liam held him still.

“I need to change you baby”

“No” Niall complained as he tried to break himself free of Liam’s grasp.

“Niall stop this” Liam warned. He knew why Niall didn’t want to be on his back however it was the lad’s fault that he had a soar bum so he’d just have to live with it.

“No” Niall argued as he started kicking out.

Liam had just managed to get Niall’s nappy off when the boy started kicking. Sick of the fight Liam merely grabbed ahold of Niall’s ankles and held his legs up as he wiped him off. Liam could still see a bit of red from the spanking earlier but otherwise Niall was completely fine.

As soon as Niall was dressed Liam lifted the boy up and started carrying him into the kitchen. Liam went to set Niall down in his highchair only to have Niall start to push and shove at him trying to get away.

“Niall, what are you doing?” Zayn asked coming into the room, “We do not fight Mummy”

“No” Niall said again. Honestly Liam was starting to wonder if that was the only word that Niall knew at the moment and he was becoming sick of it.

With both Zayn and Liam forcing him into the highchair he had no choice. It didn’t take long before he was strapped into the chair with the tray in place. Much to Niall’s annoyance the chair strapped in the back so he didn’t stand a chance at getting out on his own.

“Morning little man” Harry said coming in and ruffling Niall’s hair as he passed by on his way to his own chair.

“Hi” Niall mumbled.

Harry froze, Niall had said hello to him! That was a lovely improvement.

Louis who had been just outside the door when Niall spoke took this as encouragement and walked into the kitchen of their hotel a bit nervous. “Hey sweetheart” he said gently squeezed Niall’s shoulder.

“Hi” Niall said softly.

Louis beamed. This was wonderful!

“Open up baby” Zayn said coming over with two plates of food. He put some food on a spoon for Niall and held it up to the boy’s mouth.

Niall glared at Zayn. He didn’t want to be fed and he’d said as much before. It was frustrating to him that no one was listening to what he wanted considering this was his life. Growling he turned his head away from the spoon refusing to eat.

Harry and Louis were a bit confused. Niall had been doing so much better with eating lately; he’d been doing better with everything. He was smiling more, he was eating more, he was sleeping. What had happened to cause this change?

Liam and Zayn on the other hand were becoming frustrated. Things had been going so well that they didn’t like this sudden downturn. They did understand however. Every night for since the tour started back up Niall would have a nightmare and he would be fussy and upset for a time before finally dropping back to sleep. Last night though had been so much worse. Niall had screamed for a solid fifteen minutes before he finally woke up and he’d refused to talk about it or even give a hint as to what his nightmare had been about.

Now they did have some idea as to what Niall had been dreaming about, what had scared him so badly. They knew that it was partially their fault. Niall’s parents carried so much of the blame for this they were the ones who had abused and abandoned Niall for years. Yes what the boys did was horrible and there’s no excuse but all of Niall’s fears had not come solely from those six to seven weeks of being ignored, no they had been there for a long time and those weeks had brought those fears back up to the surface. They just wished that they understood how to fix this.

Right now however the issue they were facing was getting Niall to eat. It wasn’t proving to be an easy task. “You have to eat Niall” Zayn said.

“No” Niall said as he moved away from the food as best he could in his seat.

Zayn put the spoon down and sighed, this day was going to be extremely difficult if things didn’t turn around soon.

“Niall, if you refuse to eat then you’ll be put in time out for fifteen minutes and we’ll start again” Liam informed the lad.

Niall turned his head to face Liam. “You wouldn’t”

“I promise that if you refuse to eat again I will” Liam said. He had only given promises about things that Niall wanted so far but he realized that life wasn’t always good and Niall needed to understand that Liam meant what he said and would stand by the rules and his word.

Niall glared at Liam but when Zayn brought the spoon up to his mouth again he did open it enough to accept the food. Niall really hated having to sit in time out. There was no music allowed, it was completely silent and boring with nothing to do other than stare at an empty wall. The only thing worse than being put in time out was a spanking.

Zayn fed Niall steadily and quickly after that wanting to avoid any further protests from the, thankfully, compliant boy. As soon as Niall’s plate was empty Zayn placed a bottle of orange juice on his tray and turned towards his own food.

Niall sat back in his seat, no longer bothered from his spanking earlier – amazing how quickly that pain could go away when you’re too occupied with arguing (throwing a tantrum if you were to ask any of the other boys). He hated that he had no control over his life, it was frustrating; he had always been the one to decide when he ate and what. OK Niall had rarely had much food growing up and whatever he happened to acquire he would shove into his mouth before he lost it. There were times that Niall would go dumpster diving because he had to eat something before he starved to death.

The food that Liam and Zayn had forced upon him had been good, much better than what he used to scrape together as a kid. Honestly he hadn’t eaten this well before the age play started, he hadn’t eaten this well unless someone else had insisted upon it. Yeah once he was put in the band and they started touring and doing interviews he was known for constantly eating but those were always just little snacks here and there. If he had a plate of food in front of him he would hardly eat more than a few bites because he was too busy talking with his mates. Once age play started though he hadn’t been allowed to get out of the highchair until his food was eaten. Now he wasn’t even allowed to feed himself.

“Drink up buddy” Liam instructed, breaking Niall out of his thoughts.

Niall blinked and then looked down at his bottle of juice. He was kind of thirsty and he did like orange juice. Deciding that no harm would be done, and he wasn’t actually going anywhere until the other boys decided to let him out, he picked up the bottle and started drinking as he listened to the plans for the upcoming few days.

As soon as Liam was done eating he got Niall out of his highchair and carried him into the sitting room. While Niall was sleeping Zayn had asked Paul to the bus to get the travel playpen out of the storage room and then Zayn had set it up in the sitting room.

When Niall saw where he was being carried he started to squirm trying to get down, “No”

“Not your choice baby” Liam informed the lad as he set Niall in the playpen.

“No” Niall said again as he started trying to climb out, the playpen only came up to the middle of his waste so he could get out if he tried.

Liam didn’t respond to Niall’s arguments knowing that it would merely fuel the boy’s arguments. He pulled out a holster, it had shoulder straps, one that went around his waste and one that went between his legs all of which snapped in the back. A clip was then placed over the snaps and attached to a cord in the bottom left corner of the playpen. It took a lot of struggling but soon a pouting and screaming Niall was sitting in his playpen throwing the mother of all tantrums.

Liam just turned around and left Niall to his screaming knowing that giving a reaction would merely fuel the lad on and this needed to stop. “Calm down and I’ll get you some toys” Liam said as he sat down on the couch and pulled out his phone.

Niall didn’t like this; he didn’t want to be stuck in this stupid playpen! He wanted to play FIFA and he wanted to have his music. He didn’t like that Liam wasn’t answering him, he was too focused on his phone. “You’re ignoring me” he said quietly calming down some.

Liam was over to Niall in a second, “No baby, I was not ignoring you, I knew what you were doing and saying every second.”

Niall looked up at Liam, “They why didn’t you respond”

“Because you were throwing a tantrum and needed to calm down” Liam explained, “If I had responded to you all I would have done is encouraged your behavior and that isn’t OK”

“You could also just let me out. I would have calmed down then,” Niall answered somewhat snidely.

“Niall” Liam warned. Niall pouted but didn’t start screaming again, Liam counted that as a win. “Are you going to be calm now?” he questioned.

Niall glared but he wanted his music, “It’s too quiet”

Liam had to think that through for a second before he understood what Niall meant. “Would you like Daddy to turn on some music or a show?”

That surprised Niall, he hadn’t expected Liam to be so willing to fix the issue. “Um…” he thought about that, he hadn’t watched a show in ages, “not a Disney movie” he requested, that seemed to be all he got to watch anymore.

 

Liam chuckled, “You got it baby.” Liam turned on the telly and found a little children’s show that he felt would be appropriate for Niall. Once he had picked a show he pulled out some of the soft balls and blocks and put them in the playpen for Niall before heading back into the kitchen.


	19. Talking to Simon

Niall huffed in defeat as he sat back against the side of the playpen. He had been trying to get out for the past five minutes only to learn that there really was no way. The harness that Liam had forced him into was attached to the bottom left corner by a leash. The bottom left corner was placed against the corner of the room so he couldn’t climb over that way. The leash was long enough that he could reach all areas of the playpen from the bottom of it but if he stood up he couldn’t quite make it to the far corner thus no climbing over. He couldn’t get the leash off since it was strapped behind him. He was stuck.

At first Niall turned his attention to the telly however the show Liam had chosen for him was absolutely juvenile. It held no interest for him but it did provide background noise and there was music. Turning his attention else where Niall caught Liam’s eye for a moment from where Liam was in the kitchen – so he wasn’t being ignored, that was… kind of nice.

Looking around the playpen Niall took note of the toys that Liam had placed in there for him. There were about three balls and ten blocks, all of which were soft. With nothing better to do Niall reached over and pulled the items closer.

 

After settling Niall in the playpen Liam had gone into the kitchen to join the other boys. He had chosen the only seat at the table where he could see all the boys and Niall. Liam knew that Niall was too far away to hear what was being said but that didn’t mean he wanted to loose sight of the lad or let Niall think that Liam had forgotten him – he would never forget his baby ever again.

“So what’s going on with Niall?” Louis asked once Liam was seated.

Zayn sighed, “We’re not entirely sure. His nightmare last night was the worst yet and he refused to discuss it.”

Zayn and Liam filled Louis and Harry in on the events of the morning while they all waited for Paul and Simon to arrive. Zayn had called Paul as soon as they had gotten Niall settled back into his cot after his ‘escape’ that morning. Thirty minutes later Paul had texted saying that he and Simon would be coming over later that day.

“So you think his nightmares are about you two forgetting him again?” Louis asked for clarification once Zayn and Liam were done talking.

“Yeah and it seems that they’ve shook him up so much that he’s back to where we started” Liam said. He took this opportunity to look up at Niall, happy to see the lad playing with his toys with a small smile on his face. It was scenes like this that solidified Liam’s belief that age play really was the best thing for Niall.

A knock at the door interrupted the conversation. Zayn went to let Paul and Simon in while Liam decided to take this time to get Niall a small snack. He’d been making sure that Niall had at least one snack between every meal in order to get more weight on him.

Liam fixed a bottle of strawberry kiwi juice and a small bowl of grapes and banana, placing them on the table as he went to collect his baby boy. Paul had said that Simon wanted to talk to all of the boys meaning that Niall would need to be there.

“Hey baby” Liam smiled down at Niall.

Niall paused in what he was doing to look up at Liam, blushing furiously. He hadn’t meant to anyone catch him playing with these baby toys, he hadn’t meant to really play with them at all. Apparently he’d been so immersed in his game that he’d missed something because Liam was suddenly unstrapping him from his harness.

“Are you wet love?” Liam asked as he picked Niall up, sliding his hand down to check for himself as he asked.

Niall squirmed under Liam’s touch not at all liking it when Liam and Zayn just checked without asking though he knew that they didn’t see it as strange, he did.

“Guess not” Liam said as he started to carry Niall towards the kitchen, “You need to go before we head out for the concert later though”

Niall sighed but didn’t say anything, as he was strapped into his seat. He shot a confused glance over to the clock over the oven seeing that it was too early for lunch. Why was he being placed in the highchair?

“Here” Liam interrupted Niall’s thoughts as he placed the snack on the boy’s tray.

“He has a highchair?” Simon asked walking into the room. The boys had informed him when they had originally put Niall into age play and he had said it was fine so long as no one found out about it (management, Paul and Simon were the only to know outside the five lads).

“Yeah” Zayn answered, “He also has a cot, and a playpen”

“OK” Simon said.

Niall couldn’t believe that Simon was actually there and staring at him as he was sitting in the highchair. It was embarrassing, and of course Paul had to be there too.

“Eat up baby” Harry said pushing the bowl of fruit closer to Niall.

Zayn looked over at Niall when Harry spoke, taking note of the flush on his baby’s face, “Here love” he said as he unstrapped his baby, “Come sit with me”

Niall was ever so grateful to Zayn; sitting on his lap was a lot less embarrassing than sitting in that stupid chair. When Liam placed the bowl of fruit in front of him he slowly started eating.

Simon watched everything curiously. He had been told that the boys were looking to get someone whom Niall could talk to who would also know about the age play that way Niall could be completely open with them. Simon had wanted to talk to everyone first to make sure that everything was going all right, “So, what’s going on?”

Liam sighed, “I think to understand the issue you need to know the whole story”

Liam was the one to do the most talking, fully aware that Niall was sitting right there and that this would be slightly uncomfortable for the lad but he wanted Niall to be apart of this. Everything they were doing right now was for Niall and the boy needed to be able to say his part.

Simon listened to everything Liam said. He had been appalled when he heard what the boys knew of Niall’s childhood (Niall himself offering nothing), he had never known that Niall’s life had been so hard and he also knew that the worst parts were still trapped inside of Niall’s memory. That alone explained why the boys wanted Niall to talk to someone. Louis had been the one to talk about how hard a time Niall was having before the age play was started but it was Zayn and Liam who explained why they had done it.

Simon had noticed that about a week into the start of age play Niall had been looking healthier and happier than he had ever seen the boy so he had approved the boys request to make alterations to the tour bus so that they could continue with the age play while on tour. To hear what had happened to Niall at the beginning of the tour angered Simon greatly, the only reason he didn’t start screaming at the boys was because Niall was currently sitting on Zayn’s lap curled into him while Zayn held a bottle of juice to his lips as he drank. Clearly Niall had forgiven the boys and it was evident that none of them would be making the same mistake again – Simon would see to it personally.

Ever since the boys had realized what they did to Niall they had been trying to fix things and doing well judging by the smile Simon had seen on Niall’s face when he walked in and watched Niall in the playpen.

As Liam finished explaining Simon found he had quite a few questions. “Alright. That was a lot of information at once and I would like to clarify a few things”

“Of course” Zayn said as he placed the now empty bottle on the table and sat Niall up a bit straighter. Niall didn’t seem to like his new position because he wriggled himself around until he was sitting sideways on Zayn’s lap and cuddled up into Zayn as best he could.

“Why was Niall strapped into the playpen when I arrived?” Simon started.

Liam sighed, “That hadn’t been the plan until Niall started trying to climb out not two seconds after I’d put him in. I wanted to make sure that he would be safe”

“We got quite a scare after we woke up and he wasn’t in his cot early this morning” Zayn explained.

Simon nodded his head in understanding, thinking that something bad had happened to your baby and not being able to find them can shake a person up, extra safety precautions to ensure it never happened again were understandable. “Why didn’t you tell me about your past?” this one was directed at Niall.

Niall heard Simon’s question but he didn’t want to answer. He’d never told anyone about his past until the boys had busted him on it – kind of hard to keep some things a secret when you’re begging your mother to stop beating you in your sleep. The boys had the vaguest idea of what had happened to him and that was just to get them off his back.

“Niall” Simon prompted.

Niall squirmed in Zayn’s hold not liking all the attention. He was having a hard time getting his head around everything and it was eerily silent as everyone sat staring at him.

“What’s up baby?” Liam asked Niall gently as he placed a hand on his boy’s knee.

Niall hesitated for a moment, “too quiet”

“I can fix that honey” Liam assured as he placed a kiss to the top of Niall’s head before turning on some light music for background noise.

“Why did you do that?” Simon asked.

“Music seems to calm him” Zayn explained as he started rubbing soft circles on Niall’s back.

Niall sat there for a couple minutes just listening to the music. Liam was kneading his knee and Zayn was rubbing his back and a soft tune was playing in the background – he sighed in contentment at all of it before turning his attention to Simon. “I don’t like how people treat me once they know”

Simon was about to say that no one would treat Niall differently but he stopped himself. Of course people would treat Niall differently, he would treat the boy differently. Niall might not be the youngest of the band but he’s always been the baby even Simon thought so. To hear that this baby boy had been abused and abandoned made Simon want nothing more than to protect Niall from any and all harm that could ever come to him – and also pay a visit to Niall’s parents. He completely understood the lad’s reasoning, didn’t mean he liked it though.

 

“Alright, boys, what do you think of the age play?” Simon asked and everyone froze.


	20. Opinions

It was Harry who spoke up first, “I think that it’s helping Niall. Before all of this started I remember Niall constantly locking himself in his room and not coming out for days if he could. If you pressed your head up to the door you could hear music going constantly but nothing else. I always worried when he did that”

“And how often did he lock himself away?” Simon asked.

“The more stressed he became the worse it was. Ever since age play though he’s been more relaxed and more social. Well… until… but then lately he’s been getting better. He still has a bit of time away from us all each day but it’s minimal – it’s not healthy for him to be secluded so much.”

Simon nodded at this, he understood that Niall only got minimal time alone because it was all Liam would allow however he agreed with Harry. Niall spending days on end alone in his room wasn’t healthy for him. “Louis? What do you think?”

“I think that Niall is an amazing actor” Louis started, knowing that needed more clarification. “Before age play I honestly thought that Niall was a happy go lucky Irishman whom nothing could upset. He was always smiling and easy going when I saw him that I thought he was always happy. But once I saw him with Liam and Zayn as their baby, them taking care of him… I still remember the first time I actually saw him smile – a real smile not one of his usual smiles. It was so genuine and I was shocked, I’d never seen him so happy.”

Simon looked over at Niall; he also had thought that nothing could ever get to Niall that the lad was constantly in a good mood. How off had he been? “Did you ever see Niall really smile before age play?”

Louis took a few minutes to think through Simon’s question. He did his best to remember as far back as he could before finally coming up with an answer, “No”

“Alright, thank you” Simon nodded, “Zayn?”

Zayn tightened his grip on Niall as he spoke, “I think it’s been wonderful for Niall. Before we started this he was dangerously unhealthy. Not only was he so skinny he could be a stick but every time he got hurt or sick he wouldn’t say anything. He’s such a good actor that the only time we ever knew there was something wrong was when Niall would pass out or someone would catch him having a near panic attack because he was being crowded too close” that had been a memorable day the first time they’d learned that Niall was claustrophobic, the lad had almost passed out he was so scared. “Once this started Niall became more open about his problems. If he wasn’t feeling well, he’d tell us. If he was scared he’d grab out hand. He was eating full meals and gaining weight, he wasn’t just skin and bones”

Zayn took a pause here, taking a breath to gather himself. He pulled Niall closer still as though afraid that this would be the last time he would get to hold his baby. “When we screwed up Niall stopped trusting us and coming to us with his problems. He wouldn’t tell us that he was sick but he did tell me that he had a stuffy nose later that day. He has asked for food and drink, he’s gaining the weight he lost back and once he has he will get to a healthy weight – I’ll see to it. He’s getting plenty of sleep, no longer going out and getting drunk or getting in, what I’m guessing was fights and coming home covered in bruises and cuts.” Zayn placed a kiss to the top of Niall’s head as he finished.

Simon took in everything Zayn was saying. He had to agree, Niall looked healthier than he had before age play started, even with the month plus that he was ignored Niall still had on more weight than he used to. Clearly that was a positive, wasn’t it? “Liam?”

Liam continued his kneading of Niall’s knee as he started to speak, “Before age play Niall hid everything. All the boys have mentioned that Niall is an amazing actor and they’re correct. Niall can hide how he’s feeling; he can make everyone around him forget their concerns. He can fool millions of people into believing that he’s an overeating, happy go lucky Irishman who loves to smile and laugh and doesn’t know anything about pain and suffering and never could. He really should be nominated for an Oscar. He’s the best conman in the world.”

Liam caught Niall’s eye at that last comment knowing that everything he’d just said was absolutely true and he could see that Niall knew it too whether he wanted to admit it or not.

“Once the age play started I watched as a few of Niall’s walls slowly started to come down. He would cling to one of us when he was nervous or scared, willing to show enough vulnerability to tell us he wanted comfort. He was willing to actually accept comfort” Liam let a small smile come across his face, “He was actually wiling to come over and sit in my lap during movie night”

“The five of you have always clung all over each other” Simon interjected, “Niall included”

Liam smirked, “Like I said Niall deserves an Oscar” at Simon’s confused look Liam elaborated, “In front of the cameras Niall would be as clingy as the rest of us so as to play off the ‘nothing ever bother’s me I’m as happy as a clam’ act. The second we were away from the media or the fans Niall would let go of us and move away, out of reach. He would sit on the floor for movies – if he bothered to join us at all. No Niall wouldn’t accept comfort of any kind before age play”

“Just look at him now though” Liam said directing everyone’s attention to the little boy sitting on Zayn’s lap clinging to the man and hiding his little face in the crook of Zayn’s neck.

Point made Liam turned back to Simon; “Niall needs this”

Simon sat for a bit, taking in everything he’d just heard. They all had very reasonable arguments for Niall to stay in age play. Simon had to admit that everything they’d said was true, sad but completely honest. The fact that he’d missed so much though bothered him. Simon really thought that he knew Niall better but apparently he’d just bought the lad’s act. Liam was right Niall did deserve that Oscar. Still there was one person he desperately wanted to hear from on the matter. “Niall. What do you think?”

 

__________________________

OK question. What do you think Niall should say? Agree or not? Say his reasons against? What would they be? Say his fears? Any suggestions?


	21. Niall's Answer

Niall squirmed in Zayn’s lap, he didn’t like the question and yet he’d been telling all the boys he didn’t want to do this. He should just tell Simon that no he didn’t like the age play, that he wanted nothing more than to go back to the way things were before. Only one problem with that, he wasn’t sure he believed it.  
Niall needed time to clear his head and think through his answer, he was finding it difficult to do so with everyone staring at him.  
“Alone deal?” Niall asked Liam.  
Liam sighed, he had figured this was coming but they were all discussing this and Niall needed to participate. “Sorry love but no. You need to talk to us”  
Niall pouted at the ruling but he begrudgingly admitted that he understood. Everyone was sitting here discussing things openly and he had to participate. Niall sighed as he realized that the age play really had given him a good reason not to have to sit through these types of meetings.   
Agitated at having to stay here Niall turned his head into Zayn’s chest as he tried to drown out the other boys and listen to the music. He needed to clear his head, he wanted to answer Simon’s question honestly and accurately.  
What did he think of the age play? That was a tough question. He had listened patiently while the other boys had spoken, debating if he thought that they were being honest or lying through their teeth. Unfortunately he hadn’t been able to detect much lying, he was actually rather good at reading people. Deciding to break apart each speech Niall started with Harry.  
He had been known to lock himself away in his room whenever he was feeling nervous or stressed. Well all right he had locked himself in his way room at least four to five hours a day when they weren’t working (not including the night hours when all the boys were asleep). Maybe it wasn’t seen as completely healthy to stay on his own so much but he was quite used to it. Niall had been alone for a large portion of his life. His mother had enrolled him in online school instead of sending him to school so Niall had been made to spend every day at home, as his mother’s punching bag.   
His mother’s motivation had been to have an ever-present stress reliever whom she didn’t have to be careful with. Because he wasn’t in school and he never went out his mother could beat him anywhere, play any ‘games’ that she wanted and no one would be the wiser. Niall had scurried to the backyard as often as possible, wanting to be alone and far away from his mother.  
His father had made him live in the tool shed behind the house. Niall had been allowed in for an hour a day to complete his assignments online and then he was kicked back out. Niall never had any visitors but he could come and go as he pleased. Unfortunately not many people were too keen on talking to a boy dressed in rage, was skin and bone and clearly looked as though he lived on the streets. Niall had a lot of alone time.   
After being placed in the band all the boys had moved into one house together. It was the first time in his life that Niall had a bed. Niall hadn’t decorated his room; he’d never saw a reason to. Out of habit Niall had kept to his room constantly but slowly Liam and Zayn had coaxed him to come out at least part of the time. Once age play started all of that changed.   
Now… well he still loved his time alone I mean he really loved it, craved it. However he found himself needing less and less of it and desiring to spend more time curled up in someone’s lap. Where he was right now, curled up into Zayn, he would want to stay there forever if he thought he could get away with it. Zayn was still rubbing his back and Liam was still kneading his knee, this was nice. Niall knew that if the age play stopped he’d never seek this out, he’d go back to hiding away in his room – where it was safe. Wasn’t as though anyone was going to come looking for him anyways.  
Harry’s opinion observed: He liked the cuddles.  
Louis had made some surprising comments. Niall had never thought of himself as unhappy but then he’d never really thought of himself as happy either – more like… he was just there. Niall didn’t get to be the one to relax or have fun, he always had to be on watch, always had to make sure that nothing bad or dangerous was going to happen to him. Now he also kept watch to make sure that nothing would happen to the other boys, he cared for them and wanted them to be safe.   
As a child he’d had nothing to smile about – I mean really nothing. He had no toys, no clothes other than what he was wearing, the only food he got was dug out of a dumpster or scraped off of his mother’s plate if she was being generous (usually so she could play a ‘see what this random chemical can do to a child’ game), he didn’t even have clothes other than what was on his back and a single change in outfit. The tool shed had been somewhat better – no mother – but that didn’t make it pleasant or anything to be happy about.   
Living on the streets had probably been the best time for him; he got to go on the x-factor. That had been good, he could have sworn he smiled at least one real smile when he made it. Being placed with the boys was nice but for the first couple of years Niall was almost always on edge just incase.   
When the age play started Niall found himself the new owner of all sorts of new items. Niall had a full dresser full of clothing and different toys scattered all over the house. Not only that but Niall had attention, positive attention, so maybe he’d slipped just a couple of times and gave a few small smiles. Didn’t mean that the age play was working now, did it? Though, if he were being honest with himself, he was kind of, maybe, possibly, would never admit it but yeah, he was having a little bit of fun with the toys earlier. He might have had a small smile on his face.  
Louis’ opinion observed: He might be a little happy.  
Zayn was concerned about his health. Niall was willing to admit that he wasn’t completely concerned with his weight. In all honesty Niall wasn’t one to worry about food until he’d had to go four to five days without it, water however was a daily necessity (and so much easier to come by). His past had taught him that he could actually go a full seven days without food before he’d pass out.   
Knowing how long it would take for him to pass out without food probably wasn’t going to win him any bonus points with the boys or Simon. Also the food he has been given since the age play started was some of the best he’s ever had even when adding in the food they got while on tour. Seriously, Liam and Zayn were good cooks though no one had anything on Harry’s cakes – Niall loved Harry’s cakes.  
As far as his claustrophobia went, well… that came from his mother thinking it would be fun to lock him in hall closets or the attic that was so cramped even a five year old couldn’t stand up in it. After having been beaten the last thing Niall needed was to be trapped in a small, dark, cramped space. His young mind had created some horrible scenarios while he was trapped in those little spaces. It didn’t take too long before Niall ended up with claustrophobia and to be perfectly honest the dark freaked him out a bit as well. The dark thing hadn’t really been an issue since he’s been in the band seeing as in his room he just kept the lights on and since age play the mobile above his cot has a night-light.  
When he was sick he was quite used to taking care of himself. Or he was quite used to pushing himself through any illness or injury until he had the opportunity to pass out cold in his room. It sucked but Niall was perfectly capable of fixing his own issues.  
Admittedly it was nice to have someone hold his hand when they were going through large crowds, it made him feel safer, comforted. Zayn and Liam taking care of him while he was sick was amazing. Niall didn’t have to do anything while he was ill, everything he needed was taken care of and he slept as long as he wanted, he got long soothing baths with those salts that cleared his nose so he could breathe.   
In truth it was really, really, nice to have everything taken care of for him no matter what – he didn’t even have to be sick! All he had to do was say he was thirsty and he was given something to drink. If he was hungry he was given food, good food. If he was bored he was given entertainment. If he wanted to cuddle all he had to do was sit down on someone. It was amazing how much he got when the boys were paying attention to him.   
Zayn’s opinion observed: He liked being doted on.  
Liam’s opinions were the easiest to assess. Liam was right; he was a good actor. Everything Niall did in front of the camera or the fans was him putting on a show – giving people what they wanted to see. He was very good at it – he’d had a lot of practice.  
As the age play started Niall found it exhausting keeping his walls up 24/7. He hadn’t had a lot of time to himself and he wasn’t used to that. Out of exhaustion Niall had started to let his walls slip some, he just couldn’t handle it. Funny thing was he actually felt slightly better as the days passed, he didn’t have so much on his chest.   
Liam’s opinion observed: He was starting to trust them more.  
So far he saw that the boys were four for four. Still those were all the benefits to age play, what about the downsides? Niall did have a few of them:  
1) Nappies – they sucked! Yes he wet himself in his sleep and yes when he was scared he tended to have a few accidents but still, it was embarrassing!  
2) Nap time – Niall had to admit that he did feel better at the late concerts when he’s made to take a nap in the afternoon. He has more energy and it’s obvious to all and everyone enjoyed the time more. Still he wasn’t a baby and he shouldn’t need to sleep in the middle of the day when he slept all night.  
3) Being fed – There was no good to this, he was 21 and perfectly capable of feeding himself.  
4) Highchair – He couldn’t get out. He was trapped in that chair until his food was gone – he had never finished a meal until age play started and it was annoying that he didn’t get to say when he was finished eating. He was completely willing to ignore the fact that he had more energy now and he slept better with a full stomach.  
5) Playpen – Seriously did this need an explanation?  
6) Cot – He wasn’t allowed out of it on his own. He was made to stay in there all night long! Before he was stuck in that stupid thing he would sleep for a few hours before finding something better to do or he would come in late at night/early morning and get a few hours sleep before getting up. Now he was made to stay in bed all night long and there was nothing to do but sleep.  
7) Short bath times – he would happily stay in the bath tub playing for hours but Liam and Zayn wouldn’t allow him to stay that long. As soon as they deemed the water too cold they would pull him out. Though to be fair he wouldn’t get baths if age play stopped.  
8) Not enough alone time – Liam was being completely doctorial about this topic. Niall wanted more time, a half an hour just wasn’t enough.  
9) Spankings  
10) Time outs  
11) The boys were going to forget about him again. He’d break.

With all of that in mind Niall finally decided he should answer.  
Everyone in the kitchen had been patiently waiting for Niall to think over his answer. They all knew the fact that Niall was thinking this over so much, really taking the time to go over all the pros and cons, was a good sign.   
Simon watched Niall, studying the lad as he thought things through. Niall was curled into Zayn, clutching onto the older ones shirt with his thumb firmly placed in his mouth. Simon had to wonder if Niall was fully aware of what he was doing.  
“I don’t want to do this” Niall said eventually after having taken his thumb out of his mouth – he couldn’t believe he’d done that.  
“Why is that?” Simon asked. Just by sitting here talking to the kids he could tell that Niall was benefitting from this.  
Niall listed off his ten items (not wanting to admit to the last one) and then waited to hear the results.  
Simon took in all that he’d heard. “Is there anything you feel you can object to Liam?” he asked.  
“The nappies are important whether Niall wants to admit it or not. He was having accidents before the age play; it’s one of the reasons we went so far back. The cot and the naptime go together; Niall wasn’t getting enough sleep and would go out at night and get drunk and come home covered in bruises. Ever since we’ve taken over Niall’s sleeping schedule he’s been more energetic and healthier. The punishments aren’t up for debate – Niall’s not supposed to like them.”  
Simon had to agree with that, one isn’t supposed to enjoy their punishments. If your child enjoyed their punishment then you’re doing something wrong.  
“The highchair keeps Niall at the table; before he was made to sit until his food was gone he rarely ate anything – his weight and eating habits have greatly improved. The playpen is a new addition and came from not wanting to loose him. I nearly had a heart attack this morning when Niall wasn’t in his cot”  
Niall looked down guiltily at that last point. He hadn’t meant to scare them.  
“His bath times aren’t short. He gets to stay in until the water turns cold. I won’t let him stay in the bath any longer than that.” Zayn adds wanting to put his two cents in.  
Liam finished addressing the last issue, “Feeding him has just become routine after he threw the plate across the bus kitchen. He wasn’t eating anything back then nor was he even trying to initiate it. After that it was just routine.” Liam took in a breath here – he really did need to make some compromises, “I’d be willing to let Niall feed himself however if he doesn’t start eating after five minutes then I or Zayn will feed him. As far as the alone time goes – I’m willing to budge a little but no more than an hour”   
Simon took in all the answers and had to agree. Liam made very valid points – and so did Zayn though Simon wasn’t to appreciative of the interruption. Everything the boys had done were to help Niall and it was obviously working, Simon could also tell that Niall knew this – something else was bothering the lad.  
“Niall” Simon started, making sure he had the lad’s full attention before he continued, “From what I have seen and heard here today I personally believe that age play is the right course for you” Simon put up his hand to stave off the obvious objections about to spurt out of the boy. “Unless you have another reason as to why this should stop I’m going to let this continue”  
The boys had been relieved when Simon had started talking but they all knew that if Niall had one good reason then this would all be over.   
Niall was nervous, he had one more reason but he wasn’t sure he wanted to say it. What if the others became mad at him? What if he got them so upset that they kicked him out? Niall knew that they were rather sensitive to this topic. Still though, if there was one reason that Niall absolutely, without a doubt, wanted this to stop well… this would be it. “They’ll ju… just fo… for…forget m… me ag… ag… again. I c…can…can’t ta…tak…take i…it. I..if.. th…that ha… happ… happens…..” Niall couldn’t finish, he was crying too hard.  
Instantly all the boys were engulfing Niall in a massive hug, whispering assurances in his ears. Liam and Zayn were promising him over and over again that they’d never forget him. All four boys saying that they loved him. Niall was absolutely bawling in the middle of everything.  
Simon sat back as he watched the boys. He had already made up his mind; really it wasn’t difficult just looking at Niall with Zayn and Liam these past couple of hours showed how much better the lad was doing. He did agree that Niall needed to talk to someone though. That would be the only way to help Niall through his fear. Taking Niall out of age play now would do nothing other than allow the lad to distance himself from everyone and that was just going to hurt Niall more. No, Niall would be staying in age play.  
“I’ll find someone for Niall to talk to” Simon said as he stood up to excuse himself. He had waited for Niall to calm down some and the rest of the boys to move back a little before speaking.  
Liam turned to Simon worry clear on his face, “And?”  
Simon sighed, knowing Niall wouldn’t be thrilled with his ruling but knowing it was for the best, “And you all are doing just fine”  
Four boys let out collective sighs and one just buried himself into Zayn wanting the comfort but knowing that he would never ask for it if he weren’t stuck in age play. Niall had to grudgingly admit that it was very possibly for the best – didn’t mean he had to like it though.  
The boys comforted Niall for another ten minutes before Liam noticed the lad’s eyes starting to droop. He made Niall a sandwich and set it on the table in front of the lad – allowing him to feed himself.  
Niall was exhausted though and had no interest in moving to take the food. Liam kept his word – he waited a full five minutes before feeding Niall himself. Once Niall had eaten the sandwich Zayn tilted him back and fed him a bottle of milk.   
“I think it’s naptime” Liam chuckled taking a now full Niall from Zayn’s arms. He laid his baby out and changed his nappy before tucking him in and placing a soft kiss to his forehead. “Sleep well baby, I love you”  
“Love you Mummy” Niall sighed sleepily as his eyes drifted closed.   
Liam beamed as he turned on the mobile and exited the room. He couldn’t help but feel that things had finally taken a turn for the best.


	22. Energy

Niall was awoken from his nap by a hand running through his hair and a soft voice calling his name. Annoyed he tried to burry further under his warm blankets attempting to enjoy his sleep for a little longer.

“Sorry baby boy” Zayn chuckled “We have a concert in an hour and a half”

Niall groaned but opened his eyes. He knew the concert was important, the fans were important. Still he had been comfortable.

Zayn was slightly amused by Niall, for a boy who had just been complaining about having to take a nap he really hated to be woken from one. “All ready” Zayn cheered once he had Niall changed and dressed in his clothes for the concert, Lou could do his hair after they arrived. Good news was this was an early concert – it should be over no later than five thirty then they would be getting back on the bus and driving the three days to their next location. Zayn was thankful they’d done their sight seeing the day before.

Niall rested his head on Zayn’s shoulder as he was carried down to the awaiting vans, it was clear that nothing was going to change for him now. Simon had just given the boys a green light – he wouldn’t step in or stop them. Niall was now stuck in age play with no chance of it ending for a very long time. He just wished he understood how he felt about it.

The concert went well. Niall was full of energy and was still bouncing around backstage after the show had ended. The other four boys just didn’t understand how Niall was still going while they were exhausted.

Knowing that Niall wasn’t going to settle down anytime soon Zayn pulled Harry and Louis aside while Liam watched the boy.

“He’s not going to like being cooped up on the bus right now” Zayn started things off.

Harry laughed, “Yeah, you got your hands full with that one”

“Thanks” Zayn sneered, “Anyway I was thinking that Liam and I could keep him here, feed him something quick, and then let him wear himself out before bringing him back to the bus”

“Sounds good” Louis agreed.

“Right, the catch is Liam and I need to pick up a few things before the bus pulls out” Zayn said.

“And you want us to do the shopping for you” Harry smiled, catching on.

“Yes” Zayn snapped already knowing he would be regretting this in some way, “Here’s the list”

Harry and Louis took the list and headed off while Zayn returned to his hyperactive baby boy.

After getting some food into the lad they just gave up and decided to let him wear himself out Liam and Zayn took Niall and a football down to the basement of the arena where there were concrete walls and floors. Niall kicked the ball around for over an hour before he finally just collapsed on the floor; too tired to care when he was picked up and carried back to the bus.

“He finally done?” Harry asked as Zayn carried a tired and sweaty Niall onto the bus.

“Yeah. Had a good time though” Liam smiled as he followed Zayn and Niall up to the top of the bus. “You get him started I’ll get his toys”

“Sounds like a plan” Zayn agreed as he carried Niall into the upstairs bathroom and turned on the taps.

Niall looked over and watched Zayn as he got everything ready, happy to see that bubbles were being added – he did like the bubbles.

“Got them” Liam smiled happily as he strode into the room carrying a bag full of Niall’s bath toys.

“Perfect timing” Zayn greeted, “I just got the tub ready”

Niall waited in anticipation, a bath with bubbles and toys really did sound like a wonderful time. He’d already gotten to play football until he dropped and now he was getting a bath. Niall had to wonder, “Why?”

“Why what baby?” Zayn asked as he finished getting the boy undressed.

Liam though had a good guess as to where this was going, “This isn’t a bribe Ni”

“A bribe!” Zayn exclaimed pausing in his washing to stare back at Liam.

Liam shook his head, “This afternoon was a lot more active than what you’re used to” he said continuing his conversation with Niall knowing that Zayn would understand soon. “You also had more energy after the concert and we had some free time – both of which are rare”

Niall nodded his head in understanding; Liam did have some valid points. “The bath?”

Liam shook his head, “No. I told you one bath with bubbles a day. This is your first, and only, bath today thus you get bubbles”

“We have no reason to bribe you baby, “ Zayn said coming into the conversation, “I hate to admit it but no matter what kind of a fight you put up you will be doing age play. Neither your Mummy or I are ever going to bribe you”

Niall grumbled and turned away from the two of them. He had hoped that they might feel even slightly guilty about doing this to them – guess not. Stewing in his thoughts he swirled his hands around in the bubbles as Liam and Zayn finished washing him.

“We’re all done if you want to play” Liam said pushing some boats and basketballs towards Niall.

Niall hesitated; he was upset with Zayn and Liam for causing his current situation. That didn’t mean he couldn’t play with the toys though, did it? Niall never had toys before age play and then all of those were little baby toys and not very versatile just rattles, block sorters, balls and cars. The blocks and the balls he’d had in the playpen earlier had been the most creative toys thus far. The bubbles though he could mold and shape into all sorts of different things, he could use the bubbles to build little mounds and islands for his boats to go to. The basketballs were cool cause there was a hoop attached to the side of the tub so he could play.

Deciding that yes he did want to play and no he didn’t have to forgive Zayn or Liam if he did play.

Thirty minutes later however Zayn was declaring the water too cold and plucking Niall out and away from his fun.

“No” Niall objects kicking out and trying to get away from the two who are currently attempting to tape a nappy around his waist.

“Niall stop this” Liam says as he grabs hold of the flailing legs that are attempting to kick Zayn.

“I don’t want that!” Niall yelled upping his efforts to get away.

Eventually one of Niall’s legs made contact with Liam’s knee; that earned him five swats to his bare backside. Niall calmed down after that and soon he was dressed in a nappy and footed onesie – one that zipped in the back much to his annoyance.

“What’s gotten into you this evening?” Liam asked as he picked Niall up and started heading down the stairs.

Niall ignored Liam. He was upset with the man; he was upset with both Liam and Zayn. He understood that he was stuck in age play however that didn’t mean they had needed to be so… so… annoying about it. All right – stupid reason but still. What they said had hurt and he didn’t like it.

Liam stopped halfway down the stairs and waited until he caught the boy’s eyes. “What’s wrong?”

Niall bit his lip, should he answer Liam? One of the reasons that he’d labeled as a benefit of age play was that the boys were all there to make him feel better and dote on him. But he was mad at Liam, wasn’t he? Liam and Zayn had let him run around and play, they’d given him a bubble bath, and they had fed him. Niall had accused them of bribing him and then gotten upset when they had said that they never would. He was confused.

“Baby?” Zayn asked coming up behind Niall, concern clear in his voice.

“It’s nothing” Niall shook his head.

“No” Zayn objected, “You’re not allowed to shut us out”

Niall glared there, since when was he not allowed to keep his opinions to himself. He’d given in; let it go and now they were pressing him, telling him what he was allowed or not allowed to do with his own thoughts.

Liam caught Niall’s reaction, “Ah… so that’s what this is about”

“What?” Zayn asked still lost.

Liam sighed, “He’s upset because we basically told him that we won and he lost”

Zayn was confused, when had he said that? Oh… “Baby no”

“You said that I was stuck” Niall frowned.

“OK, maybe stuck was a strong word” Zayn assured, “I was just trying to assure you that we would never try to bribe you or to buy your love. That’s all I wanted to do”

Niall was starting to feel a little silly; maybe he had gotten upset over nothing. When did that start to happen? “Sorry” Niall whispered looking down guiltily.

“It’s alright sweetheart” Liam said, “Just tell us next time you’re upset, yeah”

Niall didn’t answer that one, he wasn’t sure he would and didn’t make any promises he wouldn’t keep.

“Alright, surprise time!” Zayn cheered in both an attempt to change the topic and because he was eager to see Niall’s reaction.

“Surprise?” Niall asked curiously.

Liam and Zayn took Niall downstairs and placed him in the front sitting room where there were numerous bags sitting on the coffee table with a rather excited and innocent looking Harry and Louis.

“So” Louis clapped his hands together as soon as the three were seated. “We have some exciting new items for our little Nialler”

“Startin…” Harry continued.

“Just get to it already” Liam sighed wanting to get his sleepy baby down soon.

Harry flashed Liam a glare before continuing on, “Anyway… to start we have multiple stuffies for you to choose from”

“Multiple?” Zayn asked.

Louis and Harry looked at each other a little nervously before they started to pull stuffies from the bags.

“So we have Rolly from 101 Dalmations, Squirt from Nemo, Tigger, Tramp, Dumbo, Simba, Mickey, Stitch, Winnie the Pooh, Lotso, and Bambi.”

“I said to get a stuffie not twelve!” Zayn said in disbelief, I mean seriously?

“Well we couldn’t decide” Louis started to explain.

“So we thought we’d just each pick a couple and then let Niall decide” Harry smiled.

“A couple is two. There should be no more than four here” Liam said.

“Yeah” Louis agreed.

“You have twelve!” Zayn stressed.

Both Harry and Louis started to give out excuses quickly, drowning each other out and confusing everyone. Niall however had his eye on one stuffie in particular and ignored all the others in the room. He wriggled himself out of Liam’s grip and walked over to the table and taking his desired item.

“See it worked” Louis said cutting off everyone’s arguing.

Zayn and Liam sat back knowing that they probably would have done the same and Niall did look so cute holding his new stuffie. “Fine” Zayn consented.

“Well it’s bed time I think” Liam said slapping his knee.

“Actually…” Harry started before running off into the kitchen, coming back with five plates of cake – one rather large one, which was handed specifically for a little boy who’d had a hard day. Harry felt bad for the kid – he hadn’t made a promise not to bribe Niall just a little.

Niall dug into his prize happily; he did love Harry’s cakes!

“Thanks” Zayn said sarcastically to Harry.

“No problem” Harry smiled.

“This was a good idea right?” Louis asked smiling.

“We’ll see” Liam grumbled.

The cake right before bedtime turned out to not be such a good idea. Niall was bouncing off the walls for three hours on a sugar high. Harry and Louis had tried to duck out and head to bed but Liam and Zayn had other thoughts.

“Oh no” Zayn said, “You did this, you get to stay up with him”

Harry looked over at the boy currently trying to climb across the room without touching the floor – very possibly going to hurt himself in the process – and then back at Zayn wide eyed, “You can’t be serious”

“Oh but he is” Liam assured the two as he and Zayn hugged Niall good night before heading up to their bunks.

When Niall had finally passed out Louis and Harry felt like singing. They changed him and put him in his cot then decided to put the rest of the stuffies in Niall’s toy chest before heading to bed themselves.

“Nooooo” Harry groaned as he took a look at what was left of the front room.

“How can one boy make such a mess?” Louis asked completely baffled.

“Lou, if I ever want to give Niall cake before bed again just punch me” Harry requested as he started to pick up the room.

“Gladly” Louis assured as he joined in the cleaning.

 

Both boys couldn’t help but wonder how the hell Liam and Zayn managed to find the energy to watch Niall on a daily basis. They’d only had the kid for three hours and they were exhausted.

________________________

So what stuffie did Niall choose?


	23. Rude Awakenings

I added up all the stuffie votes both here and on my Wattpad page and went with the winner.

_______________________

Zayn woke early the next morning. He dropped out of his bunk and felt the bus moving beneath him – they were now stuck in the bus for three days. Zayn stopped by Niall’s cot, wanting to check that his baby was safe (and hadn’t pulled another escape act). He smiled softly when he saw Niall tucked into his cot with a dummy in his mouth and the newly acquired Stitch stuffie in his arms.

Deciding to get some breakfast Zayn wondered down the stairs and into the front room with intentions of heading for the kitchen when he noticed two bodies crashed out on the floor. Curiosity getting the better of him, Zayn leaned over to see who it was.

Harry jerked awake at the feeling of a freezing cold liquid suddenly covering his face and upper chest. “What the hell!” he exclaimed as he jumped up.

“Ahhh” Louis yelled a few feet away from Harry.

“Wakey wakey” Zayn teased from his position over Louis with an empty bucket in his hands.

“What is your problem?” Louis growled wiping the water off of his face as best he could and glaring at Zayn.

Zayn chuckled, “I told you it wouldn’t be a good idea to feed Niall all that cake right before his bedtime”

“Well I was just trying to be nice,” Harry grumbled as he grabbed a couple of hand towels from the kitchen and passed one to Louis.

“You should have asked” Zayn shot back.

Harry rolled his eyes, “Just wanted to make him happy”

“I know that” Zayn sighed, “But it would have been better to bake the cake today, let him have all day to work off the sugar high”

“We didn’t know that” Louis argued.

“Again that’s why you ask” Zayn reiterated.

Both Louis and Harry nodded in resignation knowing that Zayn had a point. Didn’t mean they had to like it though.

Harry moved to start fixing breakfast – now that he was wide-awake why not? Louis grabbed the remaining bags from behind one of the couches in the front room.

“How do you do it man?” Louis asked as he dropped into a kitchen chair next to Zayn.

“Do what?” Zayn asked.

“Watch Niall all day” Harry explained, “We only had him for three hours and we actually passed out from exhaustion”

Zayn chuckled; “It helps if he’s not on a sugar high” he started shooting pointed looks at the two men who had the decency to look sheepish. “Also I don’t let him climb all over the furniture or do things that will most likely get him injured. I’m not there just to have fun”

Harry and Louis looked at each other – they had basically given into every one of Niall’s whims last night. Whatever Niall had wanted to do he could regardless of danger. Had they screwed up?

Zayn could read the guilt and uncertainty on the other boy’s faces and wanted to do his best to let them know it was all right, “Uncles however are meant to be the fun ones”

“Oh we can be fun” Louis assured, perking up.

“Most definitely” Harry agreed smiling.

“Good” Zayn agreed, “Now just make sure to either run it by Liam and I before you want to give Niall massive amounts of sugar again or be prepared to watch him while he’s bouncing off the walls”

“Oh were never doing that again” Harry assured.

“Excellent” Zayn smirked, “Now did you pick up everything on the list or did you just go on stuffie overload?”

“We got everything” Louis sneered as he started pulling things out of the bags, “The fruit and vegetables are already in the fridge along with the rest of the food. We also got the colored pencils, charcoal, oil pastels, erasers, sketching pencils, sketch pads, lap easel, floor easel, clay, play dough, crayons, some more Legos (though he hasn’t played with what he’s got so I don’t quite understand that one), coloring books and of course you’ve already seen the stuffies.

“Good” Zayn nodded, “Thanks”

“No problem” Harry said, “You should probably go get Liam and Niall breakfast’s almost ready”

“Sure thing” Zayn said standing up from his seat.

“I’ll go put these away” Louis said.

“Put the children’s art supplies in his toy box but set the nicer stuff off to the side for now would you?” Zayn asked.

“Absolutely” Louis agreed.

Zayn made his way upstairs, waking Liam first by splashing cold water on his face just because.

“What the hell?” Liam grit out.

“Careful” Zayn joked, “Don’t want the baby to pick up bad words”

Liam rolled his eyes but kept his insults to himself nonetheless. “He still out?”

“Yeah, you should see him” Zayn smiled.

Liam came over and cooed as he took in his baby boy. He was so cute when he was sleeping. “I hate to wake him”

“If we don’t wake him now he won’t take his nap later” Zayn said regretfully.

“I know, I know” Liam sighed but he did pick up a sleeping Niall anyway.

“No” Niall grumbled, half awake and not entirely sure as to what was going on.

“Relax buddy, it’s time to get up” Liam soothed as he laid Niall out on the changing mat in the sitting room on the top of the bus.

“Let’s get you changed and dressed then” Zayn grinned coming over with a white onesie saying ‘Daddy’s Little Man’ and a pair of blue jeans.

Niall tried to go back to sleep but the constant jostling just wouldn’t allow it. Frowning in agitation as he was placed in his highchair Niall just put his head down in his arms and ignored the other boys.

“Time to eat up baby” Liam said as he placed a plate of bacon and eggs on the tray along with a bottle of orange juice.

Niall didn’t even lift his head, he didn’t want food he wanted to go back to sleep. He also wanted his stitch!

Liam waited the required five minutes before forcing Niall’s head up and bringing a fork to his mouth, “Open up little one”

Niall stared at Liam, bored, “I get to feed myself”

“You get five minutes to feed yourself before I take over” Liam corrected.

“Then give me the five minutes” Niall snarked reaching for the fork.

Liam held the fork out of Niall’s reach, “You’ve already had your five minutes. It’s my turn now”

Niall glared at Liam but was too tired to argue or put up much of a fuss. Huffing he opened his mouth to accept the food.

The rest of the meal went calmly. Liam finished feeding Niall and let the boy drink his bottle while eating his own food. Niall sat and watched the other boys as he drank. He was waking up some and becoming more alert – and more bored.

The longer Niall was made to sit there the more restless he was becoming. Niall had always had a quick mind, something that neither of his birth parents had ever been thrilled about it. Whenever Niall had shown some type of advanced IQ he was punished – his mother’s favorites were electrocution and attempted drowning. Neither were very pleasant.

Niall had learned a long time ago to keep his thoughts to himself, it drove him mad at times but it was so much better than the alternatives. What would the boys do if they found out?

“Alright there buddy” Zayn said getting Niall out of his highchair, “What would you like to do?”

It wasn’t really a difficult question for Niall; he wanted time alone to draw out his thoughts, “Alone time”

“You get one hour” Liam said, “No more. This is all you get a day”

Niall rolled his eyes, “Yeah, I know”

Zayn hesitated before setting Niall down, “Be careful” he instructed.

“You are really uptight about this” Niall said.

The boys ignored the comment and Liam took Niall’s hand, leading him up the stairs and to the storage room. While they were at the last hotel Liam and Zayn had the storage room reorganized. All of the boxes were now stacked to one side and strapped to the wall (with strings, bungee chords and a net – overkill yes but it made Liam and Zayn breathe easier). There was also a comfortable dual couch facing the window that had a footrest that could come out. There was also a gate that stretched out a couple of feet from the chair so that Niall wouldn’t go near the boxes.

“Really?” Niall asked when he saw had happened to his storage room.

“Just want you to be safe baby” Liam said.

“I was perfectly safe for well over a month” Niall complained, “Don’t see why it’s so dangerous now”

Liam sighed, “You’ll still get the room to yourself. Just don’t leave the gated area”

Niall didn’t understand Liam. Still he was getting his time alone, “You have to stay outside of the room and I can’t be in your eyesight”

“Agreed” Liam grumbled as he set Niall in the gated area, “I’ll be back in one hour” he said before begrudgingly leaving the room and his baby boy.

 

Niall sighed in relief as he sat back in the chair. He easily located his i-pod, headphones and drawing paper and started to work. He always liked the versatility of a paper and pencil, he could do anything whether it be coming up with plans for a computerized desk top, working on a math proof or drawing a picture it didn’t matter. He was able to do whatever his mind could come up with, just so long as no one else ever found out.


	24. Fussy

As the thirty-minute mark approached Liam was laying on his bunk going over the schedule for the next country noting that they had an interview first thing followed by a signing then rehearsals then the concert. That first day was going to be a long one and it would be difficult to find time for meals let alone making sure Niall got his nap. The following day was an early rehearsal followed by five hours of downtime before an interview then two hours later a concert. Third day was theirs for sightseeing. The last day was a late start then a signing, a radio interview and their final concert before getting on the bus for a two-day drive. It wasn’t so bad a schedule, the only issue coming on the first day, maybe he could talk to Simon about getting Niall and either he or Zayn out of rehearsals early?

“How are you not going crazy?” Zayn asked as he paced in front of the bunks.

Liam shut his laptop and turned to face the anxious man, “I am. You think I like this? We have no choice”

Zayn paused in his pacing as he caught sight of something in Niall’s cot. “I can’t believe we forgot this”

“What?” Liam asked confused.

Zayn grabbed the stuffie and started walking towards the storage room.

“What are you doing!” Liam exclaimed shooting off of his bunk and grabbing Zayn by the arm.

“He’ll want this” Zayn explained holding Stitch up.

“We’ve only got twenty minutes left! If you go in there now we’ll have to restart” Liam said.

“But he’ll want this” Zayn repeated.

“And he’ll get it in… eighteen minutes”

“But…”

“What is it?” Liam asked. There was something more going on here.

Zayn struggled with what he was trying to say, “But he’ll think…”

“Think what?”

“That we’ve done it again”

“Done it again?” Liam said, thinking it through. What would Niall think they’d done it again? What had they… Oh, “Zayn he won’t think we forgot him again”

“How do you know that?” Zayn argued. He still couldn’t believe what they’d done to Niall; it ate away at him every day. If he was having a hard time with it then how might Niall be feeling right now?

“Zayn, this was his request. He insisted that he needed time alone. If we go in there now we’ll only upset him and have to restart the hour. We only have five minutes left” Liam tried to explain.

“I still feel like shit about it” Zayn sighed.

“I do too but busting in there isn’t going to help things”

“I know” Zayn sighed slouching down on the ground and glaring at the timer until it went off.

Despite how stressful things were out by the bunks in the storage room Niall was completely lost in his thoughts, enjoying himself. It was wonderful to get some time alone when he wasn’t sleeping. His thoughts were going a mile a minute and he couldn’t draw them out fast enough, it had been a long time since he’d been able to do this.

Currently Niall was drawing out designs for a new type of spy camera. It was basically a laser that could be pointed at a wall and on what was going on in the room on the other side. Simply put: Lasers his the wall, the sound coming from the room on the other side causes the wall to vibrate (similar to how loud music can make a wall vibrate only a lot more sensitive). The vibrations would then be put through a computer program and turned into actual sound. It was high tech and complicated and nothing he’d ever be able to build since he didn’t have the stable space let alone supplies or time but still. It was fun to design; maybe once all of this was over and he was retired he could look back at his old sketches and build some of them. That was decades away though.

Niall jumped when the door was shoved open causing it to slam against the wall. He quickly shoved his drawings and his music away before looking up just as Liam was opening the gate.

“Hey baby boy” Zayn said hurrying over, “I brought you something”

“Stitch!” Niall called quickly taking said item from Zayn and crushing it to his chest.

Liam and Zayn smiled at their boy, he was so cute with his new stuffie. “What would you like to do now?” Liam asked.

Niall knew exactly what he wanted; he just doubted that he’d get it, still it was worth a try. Instead of saying what he wanted Niall started to squirm in Zayn’s hold trying to get down. Eventually Zayn caught on and set Niall on his feet. Niall scrambled back onto his chair and started to pull out his headphones.

“No baby” Zayn scolded lightly taking the headphones from Niall, “Alone time is over”

“Then take a seat somewhere” Niall said simply.

“You’ve had your time” Liam said.

“I want more” Niall argued.

Zayn just shook his head, “You get an hour a day, that’s the deal”

Zayn leaned down and picked up the struggling boy, carrying him downstairs. Niall fought the entire way, he didn’t want to go downstairs.

“What’s gotten into you this morning?” Liam asked as they all sat down on the couch.

Niall didn’t answer he just crossed his arms over his Stitch and pouted.

“Niall” Zayn said in slight warning, “We’ve already told you, no shutting us out”

“I want to go back upstairs” Niall complained.

“You’ve had your time upstairs” Liam said slightly tense, “I’m not leaving you in there again – I don’t like doing it as it is”

Niall huffed and slouched back against Zayn. This just sucked. He had the feeling that if he told them why he wanted to go back upstairs they might just let him but that would mean telling them what he was doing. They would know that he was… sharper than he let on. He didn’t think he could take the rejection again, he knew he couldn’t take the torture again. No it was best to keep his mouth shut.

Zayn and Liam sighed, knowing that they wouldn’t get anything more from Niall for the time being. Thinking that it would be best to just pick something for them all to do instead.

“I’ve got an idea” Liam said slapping his knee and heading over to the toy box.

Niall was still annoyed that he was being kept from his drawing but he was curious. What was Liam up to?

Zayn smiled as he watched Niall craning his neck trying to see what Liam was pulling out of the toy box. Liam turned around a moment later with seven different boxes of Legos, “Which one do you want to work on?”

“What are those?” Niall asked confused, he’d never seen anything like that before.

Liam and Zayn froze, was Niall serious? “Baby have you ever played with Legos before?” Zayn asked cautiously.

“What’s Legos?” Niall asked looking curiously between Liam and Zayn.

That hurt more than either older boy was willing to admit. What child had never heard of Legos before? They were like the one toy that all children knew about and had played with at some point.

Liam cleared his throat first, “Sweetheart” where did he start? “Legos are toys used to build different items. Also you can use them to build anything you want”

Niall perked up at that, he could build things with the blocks. “OK”

“Let’s get going then” Zayn said coming around.

Liam and Zayn let Niall play with the Legos all the way up to lunch. It was amazing the things that the lad came up with. After Niall had finished the kits designs he took all the pieces apart and put them into one large pile. Niall had spent hours building ships, vehicles, boats, entire buildings, really Niall’s imagination seemed endless.

Harry and Louis came in about an hour after they had started playing with Niall. Liam and Zayn just enjoyed their time just watching their baby boy have fun. Eventually Liam got up to go and fix the food.

“Lunch!” Liam called from the kitchen.

“Alright baby boy, clean up” Zayn instructed sitting up from his position on the couch.

“No” Niall garbled. Why was his speaking garbled?

“Sorry buddy” Louis said sadly as he and Harry started to clean up the Legos.

“No” Niall said louder after having taken the pacifier out. Seriously when did a pacifier go in his mouth?

“Baby, it’s not up to you” Zayn said as he picked up the pacifier Niall had thrown on the ground.

“Noooooo” Niall whined.

Zayn watched as Niall rubbed at his eyes and whined. Niall would be getting a nap as soon as lunch was over.

Harry and Louis finished cleaning up the Legos while Zayn strapped a grumpy, whiny Niall into his highchair.

“Food’s up” Liam said happily as he placed a plate of chicken nuggets, mac and cheese, and fruit salad on Niall’s tray along with a bottle of milk.

Niall glared down at the food. He didn’t want it; he wanted to play. “Why do you keep stopping me every time I’m doing something fun” Niall complained.

“We’re merely trying to keep you healthy. You need to eat” Zayn said as he pulled Stitch out of Niall’s grasp, “Stitch will be right over here” he said as he placed the stuffie on the counter in Niall’s sight, “until after you’re done eating so he doesn’t get dirty.”

“Nooooooooo” Niall whined again reaching for his toy. Why were they being so mean?

Everyone watched as Niall started throwing a mini tantrum, stomping his feet, banging his tray and fisting his eyes. This was one tired little boy.

“You have three more minutes bud” Liam said as he sat down. Reacting to Niall right now would do nothing but escalate the issue.

Niall calmed down once he realized he had no one’s attention. This day sucked! The boys had stopped him from his drawing, they took away his Legos, they took away his Stitch and now they were making him eat when he wasn’t hungry.

“One minute” Liam said to the pouting boy.

The minute came and went and still Niall had made to move to feed himself. Knowing that this was going to be a fight but just hoping, praying, that it would go smoothly. “Open up sweetheart” he asked softly bringing a fork full of mac and cheese to Niall’s mouth.

Niall looked at the fork for a minute before fully registering what it was he was staring at. Honestly the fact that he opened his mouth to accept the fork was out of habit more than anything else. By the time he understood what he was doing there were only a few bites left.

Liam sighed in relief as Niall finished his food; that had been a lot easier than he’d thought it would. As soon as Niall was finished Zayn plucked him out of his highchair and heated up the bottle of milk.

“You wet?” Zayn asked as he took Niall (who had reclaimed his stolen Stitch from the counter) and the bottle upstairs.

“A little” Niall answered.

“Alright baby, let’s change you first then” Zayn said as he laid Niall out on the couch upstairs.

As soon as Niall was changed Zayn sat down and cradled him, “Here, I brought your milk” he said softly.

Niall accepted the bottle eagerly, he found that he actually liked the warm milk but it always seemed to make him tired. In his opinion it was best if someone else held it, he never managed to find the energy to tip the bottle far enough back to drink it all.

Niall was out before the bottle was finished. Zayn pulled the nipple of the bottle out and replaced it with the pacifier. It was amazing how easy it was to get the pacifier into Niall when he wasn’t paying attention. Seemed as though Niall’s go to thing to do when he was relaxed was to suck his thumb; if Zayn or Liam slid the pacifier in first then Niall would accept it unknowingly.

 

Zayn tucked Niall into his cot and kissed his head before heading downstairs.


	25. Uncle?

Two and a half hours into his nap Niall started to stir. He felt completely relaxed, warm, comfortable, and… safe. It was nice, just laying here and he didn’t want to give it up. He turned over and tried to get back to sleep however he wasn’t actually tired. Niall lay there for ten minutes more before his frustration got the better of him. He sat up and looked around knowing that if he made enough noise (enough being anything more than a soft sigh or slight rustle) then one of the boys would be up to get him.

Niall wasn’t really in the mood to see anyone just yet. If he had it his way he’d be hold up in the storage room with his music and his notepad but he wasn’t going to get his way. He looked up at the mobile currently rotating slowly above his head while playing some soft tune he didn’t recognize. It wasn’t surprising; he didn’t recognize any of the songs that the mobiles played or the ones that Liam played off of his phone. They were all songs that Niall assumed people would have listened to as babies or toddlers; he wouldn’t know those songs.

Niall half-heartedly wondered if it should concern him that he knew nothing of an actual childhood, if what he had gone through isn’t something that he should shrug off as lightly as he typically does. Didn’t really matter though; nothing he could do to change it so why think on it? Why let it control him now? He hated his childhood but it had come and gone – it was over. Until the boys put him into age play.

Sighing as he sifted through his thoughts Niall was surprised a few moments later when Liam’s face was hovering above him.

“Hey there baby boy, you feeling better?” Liam asked.

Niall scrunched up his face “When was I feeling bad?”

Liam chuckled as he lifted Niall out of the cot, “Bud, you have been tired and cranky all morning. That is the last time you’re getting so much sugar before bed”

“That’s not true” Niall argued as Liam laid him out on the changing pad in the top half of the bus, “I’m not wet”

“I’m just checking” Liam said as he righted Niall’s clothes and placed the lad on his hip. Liam wasn’t about to fight with Niall over his sugar intake – he controlled everything his baby ate.

Niall sighed, there were times where it was completely frustrating to have no say over his own life when he’d been looking after himself for as long as he could remember. “What are we doing now?”

“Well” Liam said plopping down onto the couch with his by in his lap, “Your Daddy and I have to video chat with Simon for a little bit so you’ll be spending that time with your uncles”

Niall freaked. His Uncle! He wanted nothing to do with his Uncle! As quick as he could he scrambled off of Liam’s lap and as far away as possible, only stopping when he hit the wall. The last thing he ever wanted was to see his Uncle again. Niall would happily live the next ten years with his mother in that damn closet if it meant he could avoid his Uncle for even a single day.

Niall’s Uncle was the worst man he’d ever come across. The pain his Uncle could put him through was debilitating. He never thought that any of the boys would ever bring up his Uncle let alone threated to take him to the man. What had he done wrong? Liam had said that he’d been a problem earlier but he hadn’t thought he’d been that bad, not bad enough to warrant a trip to his Uncles.

“Ni, baby what’s wrong” Liam asked concerned. The boy looked as though he were petrified, what was he so scared of?

“Please don’t” Niall begged as tears started to form in his eyes.

“Don’t what baby?”

“Please! I’ll be good. I won’t complain, I won’t argue, I’ll do whatever you want just please, please don’t”

Liam was scared and confused, what was Niall so scared about? What had set this off? Was Niall worried that he and Zayn would be talking to Simon? That didn’t make sense but then the only other thing he mentioned was that Harry and Louis would be watching Niall. Was that what set him off? Niall liked the other two boys; they always had fun. Really Niall should be excited considering that Harry and Louis pretty much let Niall get away with murder.

Niall was begging and pleading Liam not to do… something. “Niall, baby, you have to tell me what’s wrong” Liam asked – OK he was starting to beg a bit himself but really Niall was scaring him.

“What’s going on?” Zayn asked coming into the room. He’d heard Niall crying from the back room but had trusted Liam to handle things however after five minutes it was really starting to worry him.

Niall wasn’t responding he just kept crying. He was begging Liam and Zayn not to send him; that he’d do whatever they said, that he would be good, be perfect. Niall wouldn’t let Liam or Zayn anywhere near him. He backed himself into a corner and wouldn’t stop crying hysterically.

“Sweetheart you need to calm down” Zayn said trying really hard to understand, “You need to tell me what’s wrong”

“Please, I don’t want to go to him” Niall coughed out. He was working himself up and was starting to have difficulty breathing.

“Go to who baby?” Liam asked slowly. Who was it that could make Niall this scared? Liam wanted to know and then he wanted to have a long conversation with said person.

“Please I don’t want to go to him” Niall repeated.

“Niall” Zayn said getting his attention, “I promise you that whoever it is you’ll never have to go to them again but you need to tell me who”

“But Liam said that he’d be watching me” Niall cried.

Zayn turned to Liam stunned. He couldn’t believe that Liam would hand Niall over to someone the boy was obviously terrified of not to mention the only other people on the bus were Louis and Harry.

Liam was baffled, there was no other way to explain it. “Baby the only people that are going to be watching you today are Louis and Harry”

“But you said you were sending me to him” Niall cried.

“Love I’m not sending you anywhere” Liam promised.

Niall was slowly starting to calm down; they hadn’t broken their promises yet. Maybe he could trust them?

Zayn and Liam spent the next hour and a half calming Niall down. Eventually Niall had stopped pushing them away and he was currently sitting between the two clinging to them for dear life. They still didn’t know whom it was that Niall was so afraid of.

“Um… guys…” Harry said hesitantly coming into the room.

“What is it Harry?” Zayn asked softly not wanting to disrupt Niall just yet.

“Simon’s…” Harry trailed off there.

“Right” Liam sighed. He looked down at his boy and knowing that there was no way he could possibly leave Niall alone. Making his decision Liam stood up and took Niall into his arms, “Could you grab his Stitch” Liam asked Harry.

“And fix him a bottle and his dummy?” Zayn added on.

“Sure” Harry nodded before heading off.

As Liam and Zayn carried Niall into the TV room of the bus where they could talk to Simon (They had the computer hooked up to the big screen) they passed Louis.

“Hey baby are you ready to hang out with me and Uncle Haz?” Louis asked holding his arms out for the boy.

Niall flinched at the word and started heavily crying once again.

It was starting to click for Liam now, “Baby” he paused, “Is the person you’re scared of your Uncle?”

Niall cried harder but he did nod his head against Liam’s chest.

Liam and Zayn shared a look. How bad had Niall’s family been exactly?

“Oh baby boy, I promise you I won’t let any of your biological family to hurt you ever again” Zayn said trying to calm the lad down.

Harry came a moment later with the requested items. Niall snatched Stitch from Harry’s grasp and clutched it close as he squeezed himself into Liam further. Zayn took the bottle and the dummy from Harry and thanked him before following Liam and Niall into the TV room.

“Hey Simon” Liam greeted as he sat down with Niall in his lap.

“Liam” Simon greeted a bit confused, “Is Niall alright?”

Liam sighed, “He’s… having a rough afternoon” he said as he turned on some light music.

“Did something happen?” Simon asked.

“Let’s just say that Niall is to go nowhere near his biological family” Zayn stated as he shut the door, “Here baby” he said taking Niall from Liam’s hold and cradling the boy as he brought a bottle to his lips.

Niall didn’t seem to completely understand what was going on. He had exhausted himself out with the crying. Right now he felt safe with Zayn and Liam and the bottle of juice was nice especially on his soar throat. Whether he knew that Simon was on conference call and watching him or not was anyone’s guess.

Once Niall had finished the bottle Zayn switched it out for the dummy without Niall even noticing. He and Liam talked to Simon for well over an hour about the plans for the next leg of the tour, finding someone for Niall to talk to and then Simon had one more topic.

“Now, after this upcoming country you will be flying to America. You’ll be starting in New York however there’s a two week break before that” Simon said.

“Right, we haven’t really talked about what we’ll be doing during that time” Zayn said as he continued to run his hand through his baby’s hair.

“Paul and I’ve already organized a nice house on a private beach for all of you to stay in…” Simon started.

“What is it that you’re not saying?” Liam asked.

Simon sighed, “I have also invited your parents to come out and spend one of those weeks with you”

“No!” Liam and Zayn exclaimed together.

The sudden movement and loud noises startled Niall out of his relaxing daze. He hadn’t been fully asleep but he hadn’t been fully awake either what he had been is calm. After the scare earlier and now the loud noises and being jerked around as Liam and Zayn had attempted to stand up and Niall was fairly certain he’d heard something about having to see his mother and father Niall was once again crying.

All conversation ceased until the boys finally had Niall calmed down once again, it took longer than any of them would have liked.

“I didn’t mean to upset him” Simon apologized.

“It’s not just you, his biological families been an issue today” Liam said.

“Look” Zayn said, “We appreciate the thought but it can’t happen”

“I’ve already informed Niall’s family…”

“Biological family” Zayn corrected.

“What?” Simon asked.

“Biological family” Liam said, “We are his family”

Simon understood what they were saying now, “Alright” he said, “I’ve already informed Niall’s biological family that they will not be coming and that they were banned from all one direction events and venues. Paul had told the rest of the security crew that they aren’t allowed anywhere near you boys, especially Niall.”

“Thank you” Liam and Zayn said together.

“However the rest of your families still want to see you all” Simon continued.

Zayn and Liam shared a look, was this a good idea?

“I’ve already told my family about the age play” Zayn said hesitantly, “They were alright with it”

Liam nodded, “Yeah, mine were good about it. Louis’ and Harry’s already told their families too”

“So do you still want them there?” Simon asked.

“Yeah” Zayn said, “I think it’ll be good for Niall to see how big his family is now”

“Agreed, Niall could benefit from spending time surrounded by a large group of people who love and care about him” Liam said.

“Then it’s agreed” Simon said, “That’s all I had”

Everyone said goodbye and Liam and Zayn carried Niall into the kitchen.

“I fixed chicken Parmesan” Harry said as he put the food on the table, “You have perfect timing”

“So I’ve been told” Liam smirked as he strapped Niall into his highchair.

Niall sat quietly as everyone dished out the food and a plate was placed in front of him. He looked down at the food. Yes he had been the one to insist on feeding himself and yes he intended to do so however right now he was just so tired. If he could he would still be sitting on Zayn’s lap with Zayn ruffling his hair and Liam kneading his knee – that had felt good.

Sighing in frustration and exhaustion Niall looked over at Zayn, “Daddy?”

Zayn’s head shot up, he did love hearing Niall call him Daddy – it just didn’t happen often enough. “What is it baby?” he asked eagerly.

Niall fidgeted a little. Instead of asking he pushed the fork over towards Zayn with a little pout on his face while he kept a death grip on his Stitch thankful that it the boys had forgotten to take it from him.

Zayn understood the silent request and happily picked up the fork and started to feed his baby.

“Oh, forgot” Liam said getting up and pulling something out of the cupboard.

Niall watched curiously as Liam came over with a strange piece of cloth in his hand, what was that for?

Liam reached over and tied the cloth – Niall now realized it was a bib – around the boy’s neck before wiping the sauce off of Niall’s mouth. “There we go baby” he smiled. “Now why don’t we put Stitch to the side so that he doesn’t get dirty?”

“He won’t get dirty” Niall said pulling his new friend closer.

Liam hesitated, Niall had a hard afternoon and the stuffie was making him more comfortable however he didn’t want the toy to be covered in sauce and have to be washed later.

“How about we put Stitch in a bag” Louis suggested coming over with a plastic shopping bag in hand, “Then Niall can hold it and it won’t get dirty”

Niall thought about it for a moment. If he put Stitch in a bag he’d get to keep it but then it wouldn’t be as soft. But if he refused he’d loose his toy while he ate. “OK”

Everyone smiled as they watched Liam gently pry Stitch out of Niall’s hands and then wrapped the toy in the bag before giving it back. Niall clung to the Stitch and pulled at the bib before accepting another forkful of food from Zayn.

Dinner went smoothly and then after Zayn gave Niall his bath. For once Niall was too tired to do much of anything except sit there while he was washed – and keep a close eye on his Stitch who was forced to sit on the counter and watch.

Zayn placed Niall on Liam’s lap while he went to heat up a bottle.

“I wanna watch a movie” Niall said as he curled into Liam and held Stitch.

“One movie then bed” Liam instructed, “Hey Zayn hold off on the bottle” he called.

Zayn came back into the room a moment later just as the movie was starting. He shot a curious glance to Liam who just shrugged in response. Once the movie was over Liam fed Niall his bottle before taking him upstairs and trying to tuck him into his cot.

Niall didn’t want to be set down and clung to Liam, “Noooo” he whined.

“What’s wrong baby?” Zayn asked concerned.

Niall just placed his head against Liam’s shoulder and clung tighter, refusing to let go.

Liam and Zayn were a bit confused, “Honey, what do you need?” Liam asked.

Niall lifted his head a little and gave Liam his best puppy dog eyes, “I wanna stay with you Mommy”

“Oh baby” Liam said holding Niall close. He could never deny Niall anything especially when he was so upset. Also how could he say no to his clingy baby after having such a hard day.

“How about I go make out the big bed in the TV room?” Zayn offered.

“Really!” Niall asked hopefully.

“Really buddy” Zayn smiled ruffling his hair before heading down.

“How about I put you down in your cot while I get changed for bed then we’ll head down?” Liam offered.

“Noooo” Niall said tightening his grip.

Liam sighed, there could be downfalls to a clingy little one.

“Here, why don’t I hold you until your Mummy’s ready for bed” Harry offered.

Niall hesitated for a moment before turning to Liam, “You’ll take me back?”

“Always” Liam said.

“Quickly?”

“Absolutely”

“Promise?” Niall asked shyly.

Liam smiled, this was a good progress, “I promise baby” he said as he kissed Niall’s forehead and then handed his little boy over.

True to his word Niall was back in Liam’s arms in under five minutes and they were headed downstairs. Zayn came into the room not long after dressed for bed himself and they all turned in for an early night.


	26. New Facts

When Niall awoke the next morning he felt something soft under his head. For a second he thought it was a pillow but then it rose and fell back down and there was a constant, soothing, beat. Understanding dawning Niall relaxed into Liam’s chest further fully content to just lay here until the other two woke up.

The slight movement Niall made as he shifted into Liam was enough to inform him of a rather uncomfortable feeling. Curious Niall shifted once more before freezing as he figured it out. Oh no, no, no, no, no this couldn’t be happening. It couldn’t be true. OK so maybe he hadn’t… done… it in a couple of days but… now? In his sleep? Of all the embarrassing, babyish things that had happened so far this one was at the top of the list.

Niall felt humiliated. Yes he’d messed his nappy before but never had he done so in his sleep. Actually Niall avoided messing his nappy as much as possible – still found it the absolute worst part of this whole age play thing. The fact that he’d done it in his sleep was… it was… he couldn’t even describe it.

“Baby?” Liam asked as he reached out and turned Niall towards him. Seeing the tears slowly running down his cheeks he grew concerned, “What’s wrong?”

Niall didn’t answer; he was too embarrassed. Instead he just turned into Liam and cried eventually hiccupping out, “I’m sorry”

“Sorry for what?” Zayn asked as he sat up having been awoken by his baby’s crying.

“I didn’t mean to” Niall cried.

Liam and Zayn were confused. Niall had just woken up – they all had. What could Niall have done? Or what did Niall think that he did?

“Did you have a nightmare love?” Liam asked.

Niall shook his head. He had slept really well actually. It had been warm and safe laying in between Liam and Zayn and if he could he would do it every night if he could.

“What’s the matter?” Zayn asked as he made to pick Niall up, that’s when he felt it, “Oh baby”

“What?” Liam asked concerned.

Zayn looked at Liam over Niall’s shoulder as he stood up, “He messed his nappy” he said simply.

“Oh love” Liam soothed as he came over and took Niall from Zayn and into the front room, “It’s alright”

Niall just continued to cry as Liam changed him. He was vaguely aware of Zayn cleaning up the TV room and Harry and Louis coming down to the kitchen but it was all unimportant.

“There sweetheart” Liam cooed as he taped Niall’s new nappy shut leaving the lad in just that, “I bet that feels better now doesn’t it?”

Niall did feel better but that didn’t mean he wasn’t embarrassed. Niall felt vulnerable and he didn’t like it; it was never safe to be vulnerable. He had the very strong desire to just hold his Stitch and curl up into his Mummy. There was a large part of Niall that wanted to suppress that desire, to push it down and move on. But there was a small part of him that seemed to be over ruling him right now because once Liam was done Niall gave the best pitiful look he could and reached his arms up.

Liam understood the silent gesture for what it was and gladly scooped up his little boy. “What do you say we get you dressed and then eat some breakfast hm?”

Niall didn’t really care one way or the other what they did so long as he could cling to his Mummy.

“How are things?” Zayn asked as Liam came upstairs with Niall in his arms.

Liam just smiled, “We have a clingy baby this morning”

“Oh?” Zayn asked.

“Yeah, would you mind holding him while I get some clothes for the two of us?” Liam asked.

“Not at all” Zayn smiled, “Come to Daddy baby”

Niall didn’t hesitate to go to Zayn; he wanted to be held whether it be by his Mum or his Dad it didn’t matter. There was still something missing though, “Stitch”

“Of course love” Zayn said, “I’m gonna take him down, meet you there” he said to Liam.

“Sounds good” Liam agreed.

Zayn took Niall back to the TV room where they found Stitch laying on the floor, “Here you go” Zayn sang as he handed Niall his toy and cooing at the sight - Stitch really was the perfect toy for Niall.

“Got some clothes” Liam said as he came into the room.

“Well then lets get this little boy dressed” Zayn said happily.

Zayn made to lay Niall out on the couch but all that did was cause Niall to cling to him tighter.

“Baby, I have to put you down so that we can get you dressed” Zayn said as he once again tried to lay Niall out.

“No” Niall said.

“Why not?” Liam asked coming over.

Niall fidgeted. He would love to explain all of this to the other two. Would love to just let go and not be so clingy. It would make sense for him to let go, he had no actual reason to be holding on so tight. Niall had originally wanted the comfort because he was embarrassed but he’d been changed. Now though he was wearing nothing but a nappy and well… that was a bit embarrassing as well.

“Niall?” Liam asked again.

“Embarrassed” Niall mumbled.

“Why’s that love?” Zayn asked.

“Because… ‘cause a the nappy” Niall tried to explain.

“The nappy?” Zayn was confused, Niall has been in a nappy for months now and he’d never acted like this. What was different now?

Liam had a bit of an idea as to the problem, “Is it because you’re only in a nappy?”

Niall nodded as he brought Stitch closer.

“Well I know of a way we can fix that” Zayn offered.

Niall turned to Zayn, “How?”

“We put some clothes on you” Liam answered as he held up said items.

Niall felt stupid, how had he not figured that one out? “OK”

“Well in order for us to get you dressed I have to put you down” Zayn informed the boy currently clinging to him like a baby koala.

Begrudgingly Niall let go of Zayn but he did keep a death grip on his Stitch.

Zayn laid Niall down on the couch and started to slip a red onesie over his head. Zayn was able to get Niall’s right arm through the sleeve before running into a problem. “Love can I borrow Stitch for a second?”

“No” Niall stated forcefully as he grasped Stitch closer to him.

“What if you just switch arms with Stitch so that Daddy can finish putting your onesie on?” Liam suggested.

Niall thought about it for a moment before doing as asked and allowing Zayn to finish dressing him in the onesie and a khaki pair of short overalls. Liam had tried to put socks and shoes on Niall but the boy had just continuously kicked them off.

“And why is it that you don’t want something on your feet?” Liam asked after his fifth attempt at putting on the socks.

“They feel weird” Niall complained.

“Feel weird?” Zayn asked confused, “How’s that?”

“I don’t like them” Niall answered, “They don’t feel right”

“Do they hurt?” Liam asked. Maybe there hadn’t been fabric softener used or something.

“No” Niall said annoyed, “Weird and not needed”

“How can they be weird love?” Zayn asked, “You’ve been wearing shoes for a long time”

“No” Niall stated.

“No?” Liam and Zayn repeated confused. They were starting to get a bad feeling about this.

Pasting on a smile Liam strained to be calm as he asked, “Can you explain a little more?”

Niall sighed, how was this hard to figure out? “I don’t like things on my feet. It’s stupid that I have to now”

“What do you mean by now?” Zayn asked.

Niall sat up and looked at the two, “Really? You don’t get this?” he asked incredulously. At the two blank looks he received he clarified, “I didn’t wear shoes as a kid”

“And how old were you when you first started to wear shoes?” Liam asked as calmly as possible. Who didn’t wear shoes as a child?

Niall thought for a moment before answering, “A week before x-factor. They wouldn’t let me audition without them”

“You were sixteen when you went on x-factor” Zayn said in disbelief. Niall hadn’t had shoes until he was sixteen! What kind of parent makes their kid go around barefoot for sixteen years?

Niall shrugged, “Didn’t mind”

Oh how Liam and Zayn had many, many things they’d like to say to that. They held their tongues though knowing that it wasn’t Niall’s fault and it would merely upset the lad if they pushed it. Niall had already had a hard morning they didn’t want to make it any worse.

Plastering on smiles Zayn and Liam just brought Niall into the kitchen and strapped him into his highchair.

“I made pancakes!” Harry cheered as he came over to the table with a huge plate full of pancakes.

Niall’s head popped up and happily followed the plate all the way to its spot on the table. He did love pancakes. There was nothing better than pancakes covered in peanut butter and syrup. Greedily he reached out across the table attempting to grab a few pancakes.

“Hold on there love” Zayn said smiling.

Liam chuckled, “Well I guess someone’s hungry”

Zayn shook his head and placed three pancakes on a plate before reaching over for the butter.

Niall watched in slight concern, “No butter”

“What?” Zayn asked pausing in what he was doing.

“No butter” Niall repeated.

“OK” Liam said slightly confused, “Do you just want syrup then?”

“No” Niall stated, “Peanut butter”

“Peanut butter?” Louis asked confused. Who put peanut butter on a pancake?

“Peanut butter” Niall insisted.

It sounded a bit strange to the boys but if it meant that Niall would eat and it couldn’t hurt any so why not.

“Peanut butter it is then” Zayn said standing up to get said item out of the cabinets.

Niall smiled as he watched his Daddy slather peanut butter over three pancakes for him.

“Syrup?” Zayn asked.

Niall nodded enthusiastically, “Not too much”

As Zayn was finishing fixing Niall’s pancakes Liam tied a bib around the baby’s neck and quickly slipped Stitch from his arms.

“Hey” Niall complained as Liam took Stitch away.

“He’ll be right here on the counter love” Liam said as he set Stitch down.

Niall huffed but the pancakes being placed in front of him soon took his attention. This time Niall didn’t hesitate to feed himself.

 

Everyone happily ate their meals and were pleasantly surprised when Niall asked for seconds. Really the kid had some odd tastes but if it meant he ate more then so be it.


	27. Football and Rockets

Once Niall had finished eating his second serving of pancakes he pushed his plate away. “Stitch!”

Zayn chuckled; his baby really loved his stuffie. Still, was it good that Niall was so dependent on Stitch so much? How will Niall react when they had to wash Stitch? Because they would have to wash stitch eventually. How will Niall react when he had to leave stitch behind when they went to rehearsals, interviews, concerts, signings or any outing? Maybe he should ask his own Mum? She would know; she raised four kids.

Liam took Niall’s plate off the boy’s tray and removed the bib before he started to wipe Niall down with a wet cloth. “How did you manage to get syrup in your hair?” he asked.

Niall squirmed; he didn’t like being wiped down. If he truly was that messy he could clean himself up. “I can do it” he complained as he tried to take the cloth from Liam.

“Just hold still” Liam replied as he finished up. “All done!” he cheered as he retrieved stitch from the counter and handed it off to Niall along with a bottle of milk.

Niall snatched stitch away from Liam the instant it was within his reach and clutched it close. The biggest issue he had with mealtime was that he lost stitch. He couldn’t explain it but stitch always made him fell a bit more comforted, as though he always had a friend with him; was never alone.

Breakfast was over not long after and just as everyone was settling in the front room the bus comes to a stop. It’s not unexpected; every so often the bus had to stop for fuel. What was unexpected was that this time there was a knock at the door.

Curiously, Harry went over to answer, “Yeah?”

“This is a little back road station. There’s no one around for miles and there’s a large field if you all want to get out and stretch your legs a little” Paul informed them, “You’ll have about thirty minutes”

Niall was the first to react to the news. He broke himself out of Liam’s grasp and ran out the door of the bus. Niall only made it three steps out the bus before Paul caught him.

“Whoa there” Paul said smiling a little, “Are you supposed to be off the bus on your own? With your toy and without shoes?”

“No, he isn’t” Zayn said coming out with shoes in hand.

Niall pouted when he saw the shoes – he didn’t want then; he didn’t need them. Still Paul held him still while Zayn slipped them on his feet. Zayn quickly took stitch from Niall and put it back on the bus before accepting Niall from Paul.

“Thanks” Zayn said.

“No problem” Paul said as he squeezed Niall’s size making the boy squeal.

“Whose up for football!” Louis yelled rushing off the bus with Harry in tow.

All the boys quickly made their way over to the open field and started kicking the ball around. Niall lasted all of two minutes with the shoes before he took them off. Nobody noticed that Niall had taken his shoes off because the boy kept up running around and kicking the ball as usual – the lack of protection not bothering him. In truth if Harry hadn’t tripped over the discarded shoes.

“Oof” Harry mumbled as he sat up and looked around.

“Are you alright?” Louis asked as he and the other three boys hurried over.

“Yeah” Harry said, “I just tripped over… Niall’s shoes?”

Everyone turned to Niall then. The lad himself looked down at the ground ashamed, “Sorry”

“Love, why are your shoes on the ground?” Liam asked curiously.

“Don’t like ‘em” Niall answered.

“And why’s that?” Louis asked – he hadn’t been present during the shoe conversation earlier this morning.

Niall gave Louis a bored look, “I don’t need them”

“Everyone needs shoes” Harry responded.

“They just prove to be annoying” Niall replied testily.

Liam and Zayn shared a look, this shoe topic might be a more difficult issue than they had anticipated. Really though they should have seen this coming. When a kid goes sixteen years without shoes they probably aren’t too keen on wearing shoes when they finally got the chance. Thinking back neither of them could remember a time when Niall wasn’t going around barefoot unless he absolutely had to wear them.

Curiously Liam turned to Niall, “How long ago did you take these off?”

“Um…” Niall paused, “’bout twenty-five minutes ago”

OK. That was a lot longer than they’d thought. “Love you can’t run around barefoot in a field it’s not safe” Zayn said.

Niall didn’t get it, “Why not?”

“You could step on something and get hurt, possibly an infection” Liam tried to reason.

Niall scoffed at that, “The souls of my feet are too hard for that”

Curious and in slight concern Liam picked Niall up while Zayn reached down and brought up Niall’s foot for both to see. The souls of Niall’s feet were completely classed over; about as tough as the soul of a shoe.

“Oh baby” Liam sighed, “Does it hurt?”

“Not in years” Niall answered. What did it matter?

“Time to go” Paul yelled.

The boys gathered their things and climbed back onto the bus. As they walked past Paul Liam handed Niall over to Zayn and hung back.

“What do you know about calusses?” Liam asked.

“I’ve gotten them a few times” Paul admitted.

“How do you fix it?”

“Why? Do you have some?” Paul asked.

Liam shook his head, “No but Niall’s feet are nothing but callouses”

“Really?”

“Yeah and I want to know if there’s anything I can do to fix it”

Paul thought it over for a moment, “Well the best home remedy I know is to soak his feet in Epsom salt for fifteen minutes and then take a pad – I’d recommend a dish scrub brush and then put lotion on it. Do this about three to four times a week”

“We can do that” Liam said, “Uh… I don’t suppose you’d have those items?”

Paul sighed and started walking towards the little gas station, “I’ll be back”

Liam waited outside the bus for Paul to return with the desired items. Once he had what he needed Liam got onto the bus and closed the door it took all of thirty seconds before he felt the bus moving again.

Liam moved to put the items in the upstairs front room knowing that they’d be using it later before going down to see what his little boy was up to.

Zayn had placed a plastic tarp over the entire floor of the floor of the sitting room and all four boys were sitting on it with play-dough everywhere along with all sorts of tools to go with.

“What are you making baby?” Liam asked as he knelt down by his little boy taking note that Stitch was currently in a plastic bag sitting by Niall’s side.

“I’m making a rocket” Niall answered.

“Oh” Liam said, “What’s this for?”

Niall was so wrapped up in what he was doing that he wasn’t even paying attention to what he was saying. He just started answering, “That’s the fins and the vernier engines, they keep the rocket stable. Then there’s the propellant tank and the top is aerodynamic. It’s a pressurized rocket and runs off of cold gas thrusters though it would be interesting to test out a decomposing monopropellant” Niall said pointing to the bottom half, “The propellant gives enough thrust from the combustion chamber and the nozzle which means it can go all the way to the moon!” Niall finished as he started flying the rocket around.

All four boys had stopped what they were doing as soon as Niall started talking. None of them had expected that to come out of Niall’s mouth. The boy had basically given them a basic breakdown on how a rocket worked and they were willing to bet that Niall could have said a lot more in a whole lot of detail.

Harry looked over at Liam and Zayn, “Is Niall a closet rocket fan?”

“No” Laim answered just as baffled.

“Then what was that?” Louis asked.

“No idea” Zayn answered shaking his head.

Clearly all the boys had missed something important here. The way Niall had said all of that out of nowhere and not even paying attention just went to show that Niall was hiding something. Either Niall was really interested in rockets or… well… he was smarter than he let on. Whichever the reason the one question that nagged at Liam and Zayn was – why hadn’t Niall said anything?


	28. Bounce

All the boys were curious about Niall. They just couldn’t wrap their head around the Niall that they knew with the boy who had just spouted all of those facts about rockets.

“So you like rockets Ni?” Louis asked.

Niall shrugged, “They’re alright, kind of boring”

Liam and Zayn shared a look; if rockets were boring then what did Niall find interesting?

“And why’s that?” Liam asked.

“They’re space ships. There’s nothing in space other than planets and rocks” Niall said while completely absorbed in building something else, “We’ve already been to all the planets near enough to reach in my lifetime. Even if there was another discovery I wouldn’t be alive to see it. What’s the point?”

“Right” Harry said glancing over at Zayn completely at a loss.

Zayn just shrugged his shoulders; he didn’t know where this was coming from either. “So how did you learn about rockets then?”

Niall froze. He stopped what he was building and looked over at the other four boys finally realizing what it was he’d been saying. Crap! How had he screwed up so badly? Thinking quickly Niall gave his typical go to reasoning, “Greg was into rockets; he wouldn’t shut up about them”

What Liam heard broke his heart. He had thought that they were making so much progress with Niall; that the lad wasn’t trying to play them anymore but clearly there were still some secrets that his baby just wasn’t sharing. He knew that Greg hadn’t been the one to tell Niall about the rockets. Even if Greg was into rockets Niall wouldn’t know that. Niall had avoided Greg growing up because Greg had taken after Niall’s biological mother. Granted Liam doubted that Greg was as bad as Niall’s biological mother had been, Niall wasn’t as terrified of Greg.

“You really deserve an Oscar” Liam said.

Niall watched Liam; he understood what that comment meant. He didn’t want any of them to push this, he wouldn’t answer if they did. How could he have been so stupid? How could he have let his guard down? He needed to watch that.

In a quick bid to change the subject Niall turned to see what it was that Harry was working on. “Can I help?” he asked.

Harry looked uncertainly at Niall before checking silently with Liam and Zayn. He wasn’t sure if he should let Niall avoid the topic or not. Liam and Zayn however both gave Harry a nod in affirmation. “Of course baby boy” Harry answered smiling.

Niall could tell that everyone was nervous and he knew that Harry’s smile was fake. Still, they were willing to move on and he was more than happy to oblige.

Everyone played with the play dough up until lunch. Zayn had excused himself and taken Niall into the kitchen about twenty minutes prior to fix sandwiches, crisps and fruit leaving the other three to cleanup the mess. Zayn placed Niall in his highchair with stitch.

“What kind of sandwich to you want bud?” Zayn asked.

“Turkey and cheese?” Niall asked.

“Alright then, turkey and cheese sandwiches is what we’ll make” Zayn pulled out the needed ingredients and brought them over to the table, “You’re in charge of the bread”

Niall took the offered loaf and started to pull out slices for Zayn. The two worked on lunch, talking happily about the different countries they’d been to and all the museums. Niall openly admitted that he enjoyed seeing the art museums most (really what harm could it do seeing as how Liam had seen his drawings?). Zayn made a mental note to make sure they included art museums in all their upcoming stops as much as possible. Eventually

“Let’s eat” Zayn called from the kitchen once they had everything set.

“What are we having today?” Louis asked sliding into the room, running into the table and almost tripping Zayn who was bringing drinks to the table.

“Nice” Niall said as he watched.

“Louis” Liam scolded.

“What?” Louis asked innocently.

Liam shook his head, “Let’s keep to walking on the bus shall we?”

Louis rolled his eyes, “I’ll do my best”

“I thought he made a good landing” Niall said throwing his two cents in.

“And that’s what I mean” Liam told Louis gesturing to Niall.

“I don’t see the harm” Louis said as he took a seat.

“Neither do I” Niall agreed.

Liam glared at Louis, “Will you stop giving him idea”

“What idea?” Niall asked.

“I think he’s talking about sliding around the kitchen” Harry tried to explain.

Niall rolled his eyes, “I get that. What I meant was that it’s not a new idea. I’ve done it loads of times”

“How are you all sliding around a five foot space? There’s no room for it. Louis almost knocked me over!” Zayn said coming into the conversation.

“Well…” Louis paused; Zayn might have a point with this one, “Sorry little man” he sighed turning to Niall.

Niall slumped in his seat; this wasn’t fair.

“Here you go buddy” Liam said placing a plate of food on Niall’s tray.

Niall looked down at his food and sighed but ate it anyway. He was getting his appetite back up; eating almost normal portions.

Everyone ate happily, finishing quickly. Enjoying each other’s company and just relaxing. It was nice, even Niall ate everything.

“Well it’s someone’s naptime” Zayn said taking the empty plate off of Niall’s tray and picked up his boy.

“I’m not tired” Niall complained.

“And I wasn’t asking” Zayn replied.

Zayn ignored Niall’s protests as he heated up a bottle of milk and took stitch out of the plastic bag. He carried Niall upstairs and laid him out in the front room, changing him quickly and then leaving him in just the nappy and onesie for his nap.

“Open up little one” Zayn said as he cradled Niall and brought the bottle up to his lips.

Niall turned his head away, “I’m not tired”

Zayn sighed, and they were having such a lovely day. “Niall, it’s naptime. You can either have your bottle and then be put in your cot or you can just be put in your cot. It’s up to you”

“NO” Niall said forcefully. He didn’t want to do either.

“Alright, into your cot it is” Zayn said putting the bottle down and laying Niall out in his cot.

“NO” Niall yelled as Zayn tucked him in.

“Sleep well” Zayn said as he placed stitch and a dummy in the cot and pulled up the rail. He then climbed up onto his own bunk not wanting to be too far away from his baby.

“No!” Niall said again but there was no response.

Niall kicked and hit at the sides of his cot bot he wasn’t getting out. Soon enough he was fisting his eyes in frustration. Why did he have to become tired in the middle of the day? Why did he now seem to require so much sleep when he never did before? This just sucked.

“Oh baby” Zayn said as he picked up his crying little one, “Everything’s alright”

“Sorry” Niall said through his tears.

“It’s OK baby” Zayn soothed, “You want your bottle now?”

Niall nodded finding it too tiring to speak. It was frustrating; getting tired like this, being weak like this. Still though he really did like his bottle – not that he’d ever admit it.

No more than five minutes later and Zayn was tucking a now sleeping Niall into his cot. He placed the dummy up to Niall’s lips and smiled as the boy parted them to accept it. Niall clung to stitch on his own. Zayn kissed his head before shutting the rails, turning on the baby monitor and heading downstairs.

A couple hours later Niall was up and of course that was when he decided to ask for his alone time. Zayn and Liam gave in and Niall enjoyed his hour. Niall spent the time continuing his schematics for his spy camera and then looking into the math it would take to write the programming needed to make it work.

Zayn spent the hour calling his own mother to inquire about the stitch stuffie that Niall was so attached to. The call lasted about thirty minutes, Liam walked up the stairs just as Zayn was hanging up.

“What’d you learn?” Liam asked.

“That we need to get another stitch”

“What?”

Zayn looked over at Liam, “My Mum says that we should keep a backup stitch so that when one needs to be washed we can hand Niall the other. Also incase we loose one then we always have another one”

Liam nodded, “That makes sense. Don’t suppose you asked her about the whole freaky rocket knowledge thing?”

“I did” Zayn sighed.

“And?” Liam prompted.

“And… She said that we might want to get Niall tested”

“Tested for what?”

“His IQ” Zayn answered simply.

Liam plopped down, “She thinks he might be… what?”

“She thinks he might be hiding how smart he really is” Zayn admitted.

“But why?” Liam asked. Why would anyone hide their intelligence? He just didn’t understand.

“I don’t know Liam, I’d be willing to bet it has something to do with his biological… ‘family’” Zayn spat the last part knowing that a ‘family’ was anything but accurate. They weren’t a family they were monsters who enjoyed torturing an innocent boy.

The timer went off then causing both of them to hurry over to their baby. Niall barely had enough time to hide his notebook away before they reached him.

“Don’t suppose you’d be willing to give me more time?” Niall asked flashing a conman’s grin.

“No” Liam said recognizing the smile for what it was, “And don’t try to con me”

Niall sighed but grabbed his stitch and raised his arms anyway. It had been worth a shot. Though he did find it interesting that Liam had called him on trying to con him. He didn’t know that any of the boys could tell when he was lying or not.

“So what do you want to do this afternoon?” Zayn asked as he carried Niall downstairs.

“Oh, he’ll be hanging out with us” Louis stated coming over and plucking Niall out of Zayn’s grasp.

“And what are you two planning on doing with him?” Liam asked cautiously.

“Relax” Harry said flashing a charming smile, “He’ll be perfectly fine and I promise not to get him overloaded on sugar”

“If he gets hurt…” Liam started.

“He’ll be fine” Louis assured as he and Harry took Niall into the TV room.

Niall looked around the TV room amazed. Harry and Louis had pulled out the bed and then covered it in every pillow, blanket, and sheet that they could find. The couches then circled the bed.

Harry climbed over the couch and onto the bed then reached out for Niall. Louis handed the baby over and then climbed in himself.

“What do you say to some tunes?” Louis asked as he made his way over to the stereo in the wall.

“Yes!” Niall cheered still a bit uncertain as to what was going on.

Louis blasted the music and then jumped off of the couch and landed onto the bed right by Harry and Niall causing the other two to fall down as well.

Niall giggled, “What are we doing?”

“This little man is your own personal moon bounce” Harry said proudly.

“My what?” Niall asked.

“It’s very simple really” Louis explained, “You stay on the bed and jump around, or we drop you, or we can smack each other with pillows, whatever. Everything is soft and safe”

Niall thought it over for a moment before picking up a pillow and smacking Louis in the face with it, “OK”

Zayn and Liam were a little concerned with the constant loud bangs coming from the TV room however they left it alone. The only reason that they weren’t barging in there was because Niall’s laughter came through louder than anything else. And this wasn’t the fake laughter either, no; this was Niall’s genuine laughter. The lad was really happy and that meant everything.

Zayn banged on the door when supper was ready and the three boys came out with large smiles on their faces.

“Did you have fun love?” Liam asked as he strapped Niall into his highchair.

“It was awesome” Niall said as he happily started rambling a mile a minute about what they were up to.

Liam and Zayn smiled as they listened to their baby; it was wonderful seeing him so animated. They let him talk himself out before even attempting to encourage Niall to eat knowing that he’d consume nothing until he was done.

Eventually they got Niall to eat and then he was bathed before they all settled in for a movie. As soon as the movie finished Liam changed Niall and then fed him his evening bottle before tucking the lad into his cot for the evening with dummy and stitch.

“Sleep well love” Liam said before pulling up the rails and going to join the others.


	29. First Session

Sorry it took so long to update but things are getting busy. Also it took some time to write, wasn't sure how to start. Truth too I also got a bit caught up in nonograms. Enjoy.

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During the night Niall had a small nightmare but Liam and Zayn were easily able to calm him without having to wake him up. They counted that as a wonderful step forward. The morning went on calmly, the boys relaxed and enjoyed themselves.

Niall took his alone time almost immediately after breakfast, which gave Liam and Zayn a chance to talk to Simon about adjusting Niall’s schedule for the following day. The boys wanted to make sure that Niall had time for his nap as it was going to be a long day and they both knew from experience that a tired baby was a cranky baby. Simon had agreed to let Zayn and Niall out of rehearsals since both knew their parts best. Simon had also informed the boys that they would be arriving at their hotel later that afternoon and Niall’s first appointment with his new psychiatrist at 3:30 that afternoon.

The bus stopped at the hotel about twenty minutes into Niall’s nap. Liam decided to stay on the bus with Niall while the rest of the boys went up to the hotel room. Zayn would make sure that all of Niall’s things were brought in and set up so in the room.

 

Niall stretched and yawned as he came around. He sighed when his arms his the sides of his cot; there were times that he really wished that he had a bigger bed, one he could stretch out in. Huffing in resignation Niall sat up and looked around. The bus was still; they had arrived at the new hotel. Why was he still on the bus?

A surge of panic ran through Niall – they’d left him again. They’d left him! After they’d promised they wouldn’t they left him. He knew it had been too good to be true; he knew that they would abandon him again, forget him again. Why had he trusted them?

Completely heart broken Niall just curled up in a ball and started crying. He felt humiliated that he’d been duped but more than that he just felt broken.

“Hey, hey little man” Liam worried as he lowered the side of the cot, “What’s wrong?”

Niall jerked his head up as he heard Liam’s voice, “You… you… you’re st… sti… still h….”

Liam understood then, “Oh baby” he said as he scooped his boy up and held him close, “I didn’t go anywhere. I was always in the next room waiting for you. I told you I’d never leave you. I promised you”

“I… I… I thought” Niall hiccupped. Liam was here! Liam hadn’t left! Maybe he did mean what he’d said. Maybe he would keep his promise. Maybe Zayn would too.

“Never love never” Liam assured as he paced the top half of the bunk and bounced Niall.

It took a lot less time than Liam had thought to calm Niall down. He couldn’t believe he’d been so stupid! He should have known that Niall would notice the bus wasn’t moving and that the others had left. He was coming to realize that Niall was a lot smarter than he let on; he’d have put two and two together and assume he’d been ignored again. Liam should have stayed on his bunk he just hadn’t wanted to wake Niall.

“I’m sorry baby” Liam apologized.

Niall leaned back a little so he could see Liam’s face, “for what?” What had Liam done, he was still here, he hadn’t left.

“I should have stayed closer” Liam explained, “I never meant to make you think that you were forgotten. You will never be forgotten again I promise”

Niall just laid his head against Liam’s chest, searching for the heartbeat and placing his ear over it. He sighed when he found it as he brought his thumb up to his mouth unintentionally.

Liam watched Niall and was relieved when the lad curled into him. He stopped the thumb headed towards Niall’s mouth and slipped a dummy through the parted lips instead while wondering where the previous dummy had gotten to. Maybe it was time to invest in a dummy clip or two.

“You wet love?” Liam asked after a few minutes. He didn’t wait for a response before he started walking back to the sitting room where there was a changing pad laid out on the couch.

“Yes” Niall whispered as he was set down either missing or ignoring the fact that it came out a bit lisped around the dummy.

“Well then lets just get you all cleaned up,” Liam said in an upbeat tone trying to lighten the mood some.

A nappy change and a washed face later and Liam was leading Niall by the hand into the hotel room. “The baby’s here!” Harry yelled excitedly as he spotted Niall.

Harry smiled and came over to take Niall out of Liam’s grasp but Niall just clung tighter. “What’s wrong?” Harry asked, “Don’t you want to see your Uncle Harry?” All the boys had sat Niall down and explained Harry and Louis were the Uncle that Liam had been talking about originally. It was taking time but Niall was no longer flinching at the word Uncle so they counted it as a good sign.

“I want Mummy” Niall said holding tighter to Liam although this time he did notice the dummy and spit it out.

“Hey, hey none of that” Zayn said picking the dummy up and cleaning it off before offering it back to Niall.

Niall turned his head away from the dummy and buried it into Liam’s neck instead. He could feel Liam chuckle as the man moved to sit down and reposition Niall in his lap.

“What time is it?” Zayn asked as he moved over to sit on the other side of Liam and Niall.

“Uh… three twenty” Louis answered looking at the clock in the kitchen.

“Right” Zayn said, “Listen. Niall’s new psychiatrist is going to be here in a few minutes…”

“No” Niall objected lifting his head off of Liam’s chest.

Liam quickly hushed Niall as Zayn continued, “and we were hoping that the two of you would be willing to head out for a little bit?”

“Of course” Harry and Louis agreed. They would have liked to stay and listen in on the session but they also understood that Niall would do better with the privacy.

“No” Niall repeated again. He did not want to talk to anyone about his past let alone a psychiatrist of all people. He was perfectly fine, always had been, no need to discuss it.

Harry and Louis merely excused themselves knowing that there would be a fight coming on and not wanting to watch. As they reached the door they ran right into Niall’s new psychiatrist.

“Hi, my name’s Dr. Collins” the man, Dr. Collins, introduced.

“Yeah, hey” Harry said.

“We were just heading out, Niall’s over on the couch though” Louis said.

“Thank you” Dr. Collins said as he headed into the room towards the other three people.

Niall was the first to notice the newcomer in the room, “No”

Zayn sighed as he stood up and greeted the man, “Hi, thanks for coming. I’m Zayn, that’s Liam and the little one is Niall”

“Hi, I’m Dr. Collins” the Dr. said as he shook Zayn’s hands and then sat on the couch across from the three.

Everyone sat in silence for a few moments the three boys not quite sure what to do and Dr. Collins just observing.

“So, I’ve been given some basic facts but I’d like to hear from the three of you exactly why you think I’m needed” Dr. Collins said to get the ball rolling.

“Alright,” Liam started, “We…”

“No” Niall cut off. He didn’t want to do this.

“Niall” Zayn warned.

Niall huffed and tried to break himself from Liam’s grasp but to no avail. Liam was stronger than he was and just wouldn’t let go. “NO!”

“We’ve talked about this Ni” Liam said, “This is important”

Niall scoffed, “This isn’t important. All this guys gonna do is listen to what you tell him and then diagnose me with abandonment issues or post traumatic stress disorder or depression or panic attacks or any of the other fun disorders that tend to come with childhood abuse and abandonment. He’ll then write some script for whatever he feels I have and you’ll try to force me to take it. I won’t take it. I’m fine. I see no reason to talk to a shrink, they all suffer from megalomania and are never happy until everyone under their purview is on something.”

Liam and Zayn were a bit surprised; they hadn’t expected Niall to be so… informed about this. Guess it just went to show how much Niall was really hiding his intelligence.

“Niall” Dr. Collins spoke up, “I will not put you on drugs of any kind alright”

Niall just glared at the man not believing a word he said.

Liam and Zayn exchanged a look, having some sort of private conversation before coming to an agreement.

“Tell you what” Liam said as he stood up with Niall, “Why don’t you play for a little bit while Daddy and I talk to the Dr.”

“No” Niall said but it didn’t really matter because Liam had already set him down in the playpen off of the sitting room.

The hotel room was large; there was a kitchen, a sitting room and a TV room as well as five bedrooms. The playpen was set up in the TV room but could be seen from both the sitting room and the kitchen however Niall wouldn’t be able to hear the conversation. It wasn’t necessary for Niall to be there while Zayn and Liam were telling Dr. Collins everything that they knew – because let’s be honest, Niall was going to offer nothing at this point.

“You try to climb out and I’ll strap you in” Liam informed the scowling boy.

Niall crossed his arms and turned his back on Liam but knew better than to try and escape; he’d just loose in the end. He watched as Liam placed some Legos and a coloring book with a box of crayons in the playpen with him before standing back up.

“Would you like anything else?” Liam asked before leaving.

Niall wanted to stay silent, continue ignoring Liam but he did want something, “Drink” he mumbled.

“Of course love” Liam said as he moved off and prepared Niall a bottle of juice. “Here you go baby boy” Liam handed Niall the bottle and ruffled his hair before heading back to the sitting room.

“Sorry about that” Liam apologized.

“It’s fine really,” Dr. Collins assured, “I learned a lot from that”

Zayn nodded and then decided to take up where they left off, “From what little we know of Niall’s past we can tell you that he was physically abused as well as ignored”

“Can you elaborate on that any?” Dr. Collins asked as he pulled out a notepad.

“His mother was physically abusive to his for years… until he was ten I believe. His brother Greg would take turns beating him as well though it doesn’t seem to be as bad a case it wasn’t pleasant either. Also it appears that his mother would send Niall to his…” Liam swallowed, keeping the disgust out of his voice as long as possible, “Uncle” he sneered.

Zayn joined in Liam’s opinion of Niall’s biological family (especially the ‘uncle’) and could tell that Liam needed a moment to stop the urge to vomit so he stepped in. “We don’t know what that man did to Niall only that Niall is petrified of him, worse than any of the others.”

“After he was ten he and his brother moved in with their father” Liam continued, “His father made Niall live in the garden shed outback where he had nothing. Sometime between moving in with his father and appearing on the x-factor six years later Niall had been kicked out and was living on the streets though we don’t know when that started”

Zayn and Liam continued to tell Dr. Collins about how they met, becoming famous, the touring and the travel, Niall’s stress and self-destructive tendencies. How Niall would often distance himself from everyone and wasn’t taking care of himself. They talked about the age play and what it entailed, how it had been going, and eventually how they had screwed it up. From there it was merely a summary of the past month.

Once everything had been said the two boys waited anxiously for Dr. Collins to say something, anything.

Dr. Collins listened and took notes. He also watched Niall during this time. Dr. Collins had heard of age play before, in fact he’d treated many patients who were in age play this case was the worst he’d heard of though. As he watched Niall he found himself amazed, the lad had taken to the Legos first and had built what looked to be a massive telescope with a row of computer controls surrounding it. The design was complicated and intricate and Dr. Collins was fairly certain it wasn’t the kit. Currently though Niall was coloring a picture of Andy and Woody from Toy Story and drinking juice from a bottle.

“Well,” Zayn said looking over at the clock and seeing that it was quarter to seven, “It’s getting late. I hate to end this before you’ve gotten a chance to talk to Niall but it’s getting late and we’re already late for supper”

“Of course” Dr. Collins said standing up, “How about we schedule another appointment for…”

“Day after tomorrow. About ten thirty” Zayn finished.

“Sounds good” Dr. Collins agreed.

The boys showed Dr. Collins out before going over to Niall.

“Hey little man” Zayn said as he leaned down. He took in what the boy had made with the blocks – it definitely looked… complicated? Still it just went to show two things. 1) That Niall was feeling comfortable enough around them to do things like the rocket or this… telescope? 2) That Niall was a hell of a lot smarter than anyone of them knew.

Niall looked up at Zayn, “He gone?”

“He’ll be back in two days and I expect you to behave” Zayn said as he lifted Niall out of the playpen. “Time for supper”

Liam had texted Harry and Louis while Zayn was getting Niall and soon enough all five of them were sitting down at the table eating. Niall perked up when Harry and Louis arrived because they were usually good for a laugh. Louis of course being the partner in crime in almost any and every game, prank or skit; Harry was excellent at playing the calm mind that would get Liam and Zayn not to blow a top.

 

After supper Niall enjoyed his bath before being fed his bottle and put to bed.


	30. Testing

The next day went by smoothly until Niall found out that he and Zayn would be missing rehearsals.

“I don’t need a nap!” Niall yelled at Zayn as the man tried to change him. Niall couldn’t believe this; he didn’t need to miss rehearsals so that he could take a stupid nap. This was ludicrous!

Zayn sighed in frustration. “Niall you need to take a nap”

“NO!!” Niall screamed in Zayn’s face.

Zayn had been trying to be patient, he really, really had. He understood Niall’s frustration but it was obvious that the boy did better when he’d had his afternoon nap. Finally having enough of this tantrum Zayn picked Niall up and placed him on a chair in the corner of the room. “Time out, ten minutes” he stated walking away.

“NO!” Niall screamed again as he stood up and started running for the door. He wasn’t fast enough.

Zayn scooped up a struggling Niall and landed three quick swats to his bum before sitting him back down on the chair and restarting the timer.

Niall attempted escape four more times before submitting to his fate. All in all it took half an hour before Niall was finally allowed out of the corner.

“Alright love” Zayn said coming over to Niall, “You can come out now”

Niall turned around to face Zayn; tears running down his face, “I’m sorry Daddy” he cried holding his arms up.

Zayn happily took Niall into his arms, “It’s alright baby boy. All’s forgiven”

Zayn laid Niall out on the changing mat and quickly got him into a fresh nappy before placing the exhausted lad into his cot, “Sleep well love” he said brushing Niall’s hair off of his forehead before kissing his cheek and pulling up the rails. Zayn made sure to turn on the mobile before leaving the room, setting his alarm and crashing on the couch. Having a baby was exhausting.

Zayn was startled awake half an hour later by the buzzing of his phone. “Hello” he answered groggily.

“Did I wake you?” Simon smirked.

“What? No” Zayn sat up and rubbed the sleep from his eyes, “Did you need something?”

“Yes” Simon paused, a bit nervous, “Now you know that Dr. Collins informs me of his findings the same as he is to inform you and Liam?”

“Yeah” Zayn said cautiously. Simon had informed Liam and Zayn that he would be talking to the Dr. after each session. Simon wanted to keep tabs on Niall because he was concerned for the boy. Also Simon wanted to make sure that Niall was being taken care of properly; make sure that the boy’s never neglected Niall again.

“Right well, the Dr. mentioned that Niall seemed rather bright” Simon continued.

Zayn sighed, he had been expecting this, “Yeah we’ve noticed it too; some of the things he says just leaved me floored”

“Yes. Dr. Collins mentioned that Niall seemed to have a rather decent understanding of different traumas caused by child abuse as well as a… dislike of psychologists. I believe he called them ‘megalomaniacs’”

Zayn chuckled, “Yeah had to look that one up after the session was over”

“Dr. Collins also mentioned that Niall used the Legos to build a rather intricate telescope – describing it as being on the same lines as the Hubble telescope – and a computer control panel to go with it” Simon continued.

“Yeah” Zayn nodded, “He’s also shown that he has a decent understanding of rockets though I don’t think he’s actually interested in rockets”

“My point exactly. Niall is smarter than he let on” Simon says.

“Agreed but what’s the point of this exactly?” Zayn asked still confused.

Simon sighed, “I have arranged for Dr. Collins to administer an IQ test tomorrow during Niall’s session”

“Oh…” Zayn hesitated, “I’m not sure Niall will go for that”

“Well please do your best to get him to take it seriously” Simon asked.

Zayn sighed knowing this would be hard, “I’ll try” he acquiesced.

“Thank you. That’s all I ask” Simon said before hanging up.

Zayn leaned back against the couch, “How am I supposed to pull this off?”

Despite all of Niall’s protests it turns out that the nap had been for the best after all. The concert went well (Niall having plenty of energy) and Niall got to enjoy a long bath after before being put to bed for the evening.

In the morning Niall was the first one up; he sat up and stretched before taking the time to look around the room. Despite the fact that there were five bedrooms in this hotel, which meant that there was a bed for him, he was still forced to sleep in the travel cot. Still though, he had his own room.

Boredom set in quickly; Niall could see his notepad, pencil, i-pod and headphones sitting on the bed on the other side of the room. It was only twenty feet away and yet he couldn’t have it. Niall debated with himself for a minute more before standing up in the cot and grabbing onto the top of the bars.

The cot itself came up to a foot below his neck; if he worked at it hard enough he could get out. Still he wasn’t allowed out of his cot on his own – the boys always said he could hurt himself. But he was bored! Making his decision Niall started to lifting himself over the side of his cot.

Liam was stirred awake by noises from the baby monitor; why couldn’t Niall just call for them? Sighing he got off his bed, slipped on a shirt and walked over to the room his baby was in.

“What are you doing?” Liam asked sternly as he opened the door.

Niall started at Liam’s sudden presence and released his grip on the railing. With the sudden shock and the loss of support Niall quickly fell back onto the mattress and his head banged lightly against the bottom back half of the cot.

There was padding all around the bottom half so that Niall wouldn’t accidentally roll over and bang into solid wooden bars in his sleep. In truth it hadn’t really hurt that much, just scared him more than anything; yet for some unknown reason Niall burst into tears.

Liam hurried over to Niall and scooped him up, “It’s alright, you’re ok” he soothed as he bounced the boy a little and paced the room. “This is why you aren’t allowed to let yourself out of your cot” Liam said once Niall had calmed some.

“Sorry Mummy” Niall said softly as he stopped crying and just curled into Liam seeking out his heartbeat. Niall couldn’t explain it but being able to hear Zayn or Liam’s heart beat always seemed to sooth him, let him know that he wasn’t alone even if his eyes were closed.

Liam sighed, really the fall and the scare were punishment enough – no need to rehash it. It took a moment for Liam to realize that his baby was wet, “Why don’t we get you changed and dressed hm?”

Liam had posed it as a question but really it was just telling Niall what was going to happen next. It didn’t take long either before Niall was sitting in his highchair staring at a plate of oatmeal fruit and toast.

Breakfast was quick and then they were whisked away to rehearsals. Thankfully everyone was focused this morning (the first time in history that not a one of them interrupted rehearsal because they were goofing off) and rehearsals got out early!

Naturally wanting to get the session with Dr. Collins over with as soon as possible Liam called the man to bump up the time while Zayn asked Harry and Louis to find someplace else to be for a little while.

Niall watched from the playpen as Liam and Zayn talked quietly by the table. He wasn’t a hundred percent certain as to what was going on but he could take a good guess. The dreaded Dr. was coming back. As if just to prove him right said man walked into the kitchen mere seconds later.

“Alright baby, you ready?” Liam asked as he took Niall out of the playpen and over to the table.

“No” Niall stated, as he was strapped into his highchair.

“It’ll be fun” Dr. Collins said as he pulled out a packet and a pencil.

Niall looked up at the Dr. like he was a moron – which quite frankly is exactly what Niall thought he was. “And how is taking a test supposed to be fun?”

Zayn sighed, “Ni” he said crouching down to eye level with the lad, “you know how Mummy and I make promises and that we will never break a promise?”

“Yeah” Niall nodded. Where was this going?

“Well I want you to promise me that you will do your very best on the test that Dr. Collins is going to give you” Zayn went on.

“No” Niall answered immediately.

“Love this has nothing to do with talking about your past alright, this is something separate. We just want you to do the best you can” Liam said coming in.

Niall was confused, “If it has nothing to do with the shrink then why is he the one giving it?”

“Because I was already coming” Dr. Collins answered. It was the truth; he had the right to give the test and score it in front of both Liam and Zayn but the results wouldn’t change Niall’s past or the fact that he needed to be in therapy or why.

Niall looked to Liam and Zayn for confirmation on this because he did not trust the shrink. He received affirmative nods from the two whose opinions counted most to him, “Alright” he mumbled.

“Wonderful” Liam cheered.

“Now you have an hour to finish this” Dr. Collins informed Niall as he placed the test on the tray in front of Niall, “If you finish early that’s fine too.”

Niall nodded. He still didn’t understand the point to this; what was this test supposed to show? What did it mean? Still he’d promised to do his best and he didn’t want to break a promise to his Mum and Dad. Sighing he opened the booklet and started in.

Ten minutes later Niall shut the booklet and looked up at the other three in the room, “Done” he said.

Dr. Collins was stunned, only fifteen percent of test takers ever even finished the thing in the time limit. Only five percent finished with time to spare. He’d never seen anyone finish so quickly. Still he took the test and sat down to score it.

“Baby, do you want some paper and pencils?” Liam asked.

Unlike Dr. Collins Liam and Zayn didn’t understand the significance of Niall finishing so quickly. The test had looked like nothing more than puzzles to them and while they might not be as adept at puzzles as Niall it was clear the boy saw it as easy.

“Yes please” Niall answered politely.

“Well that was wonderful manners love” Zayn smiled as he placed a packet of drawing paper and some colored pencils on Niall’s tray.

Niall gaped at what he’d been given. The paper was drawing paper, real drawing paper. And the pencils were numerous, each one a different color. It was amazing! Happily Niall set in to amuse himself for quite some time; there was no telling what he could do with supplies like these.

Dr. Collins took over an hour to grade the test. He had rechecked it three times just to be sure because really he had never heard of someone that high (well maybe two or three others but that was it in all of history).

“Alright then” Dr. Collins said finally ready to give the results.

Zayn and Liam turned from what they were doing drawing with their baby and looked over at Dr. Collins expectantly.

Dr. Collins sighed, “So I just have to say I’ve never seen a score this high myself”

“Score for what?” Niall asked.

“Your IQ love” Liam answered.

“My what!” Niall screeched. No oh no no no he did not just take an IQ test. Please don’t let it be an IQ test. There was a reason he didn’t show how his full intelligence; he did like his life.

“It’s alright” Zayn tried to sooth but Niall was still freaking out. Worried Zayn unlatched Niall and picked him up holding him close, “You need to calm down love, it’s alright. Nothing bad’s going to happen. I promise”

Niall did his best to calm down. Eventually he stopped crying and just laid his head on Zayn’s chest with his ear above Zayn’s heartbeat. Liam managed to slip the pacifier into Niall’s mouth before the lad’s thumb found it’s way in. Once all was said and done the two parents turned to look at the Dr.

“You have one very smart boy” Dr. Collins said, “Niall’s IQ proved to be extremely high”

“What like Einstein high?” Liam asked.

“No, not quite” Dr. Collins said nervously, “Einstein’s IQ was only 160, Galileo was only 185. Niall… well… Niall’s is higher”

 

“How much higher?” Zayn asked. How smart could Niall be?

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So what is Niall's IQ?


	31. Niall's IQ

Sorry it's taken so long to update and it's so short. Family's in town and things have been crazy. I'll try to update again as soon as I can but it might be a few days. This is just a quick chapter to answer the question of Niall's IQ level and give some basic information about what high intlelligence can lead to. I did my research and everything is accurate (based on what I can find on the internet) with the exception of the IQ I gave Niall - that I made up I have no idea what his real score is.

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Before Dr. Collins had been able to answer Zayn’s question Niall threw a huge fit. The boy had been scared; petrified would be more accurate. There was a reason Niall kept his intelligence quiet, hidden. Growing up his parents hadn’t appreciated having a smart son.

When Niall was two and a half he had been sitting at the table with his father and older brother (this was before he was banned from the kitchen) while his mother was cooking at the stove. His father had been reading the paper and had put the parts he didn’t care for on the table. Niall had been bored so he had picked up the discarded paper.

Everyone in the room had frozen to watch the small boy, barely tall enough to see over the table from his seat on three books, reading the paper as though it were natural. Niall’s family had scoffed and asked what he was doing. When Niall said that he was reading they hadn’t believed him so Niall went to prove them wrong by reading the paper aloud to them. That hadn’t gone over well.

Greg had ripped the paper from his hands and his father had grabbed Niall by his hair and dragged him outside (this being the middle of winter) before locking the door and leaving Niall to freeze in the cold while shouting about how they didn’t need a smart arse in the house. Niall had been allowed in that evening by his brother – that was before Greg had started hitting him.

After that day Niall had been punished whenever he did or said something that was ‘smarter’ than his age. It started with beatings, and then electrocution then being held under the water and finally any infraction earned him a trip to his uncle. Once it involved his uncle Niall avoided showing his intelligence like the plague.

Niall realized now how badly he had screwed up here, with the boys. His… ‘family’ had always told him that he was impossible, a useless arse, complete idiot. They always said that no one would want anything to do with him, that the other boys would grow tired of him as well and realize that the only thing he was good for was a stress reliever.

Really Niall should have known better than to agree to take any test, especially when he was made to promise to do his best. It should have been a red flag but he’d ignored it, let himself become too complacent, too trusting of the boys to think that they would do anything bad. He’d screwed up.

It had taken Liam and Zayn an hour to calm Niall down and in truth Niall hadn’t actually calmed down so much as dropped off because of exhaustion. Sighing as they finally laid the sleeping lad down in his cot the two parents couldn’t help but coo at the sight. Niall was clutching his Stitch to his chest with a dummy bobbing in his mouth and he looked so young and adorable.

With Niall finally taken care of Liam and Zayn had gone back out to talk to Dr. Collins. After a long conversation Zayn and Liam were slightly more informed as to what Niall’s IQ was as well as a vague idea of what that meant.

The Dr. had started by explaining the breakdown of the IQ chart:

Under 70 meant that one was feeble minded

70-79 meant borderline deficiency

80-89 meant dullness

90-109 meant normal/average intelligence. Approximately 68% of test takers scored in this one range alone.

110-119 meant superior intelligence

120-135 meant very superior intelligence

135-144 meant genius (e.g. professor at a university)

145-154 meant genius (e.g. noble prize winner)

155-200 meant ‘extreme’ genius

And over 200 meant immeasurable intelligence. Point one percent of test takers scored in this range.

Niall scored in the last range. Dr. Collins said that he’d never seen a score so high in his life. There were only a few people who even had estimated a score so high. There were approximately three people who had actually scored in the last range.

Dr. Collins had taken a deep breath before handing over the test results. Liam and Zayn had ended up banging their heads together in their eagerness. Stunned silence filled the room once the paper was opened. Niall’s IQ was 224.

Dr. Collins had tried to explain what it meant for Niall but he really couldn’t. He did give Liam and Zayn some research that had been done as far as genius went. Now whether or not the research was accurate to all or if it even applied to Niall was uncertain but still, anything helped.

From what Dr. Collins said the fact that Niall sought time alone was common, it gave him time to work things out. The Dr. even suggested that Niall was most likely building something or at least designing something. The boys were also cautioned to limit the amount of time Niall takes, it wasn’t uncommon for geniuses to get caught up in a new idea and ignore hunger, sleep, everything and focus solely on their work for days on end.

People with higher IQ’s also tend to experiment with alcohol and drugs because they are curious and offer a stress reliever. The effect that drugs and alcohol can have on a person; many decide to do their own research (especially considering doing a drug research is illegal). Not every genius did this but it was known to happen. It isn’t a healthy habit and one to be avoided. Good news is that with the boys keeping such close tabs on Niall, the lad wasn’t about to get his hands on either of those things.

Geniuses also tended to be night owls as well as follow what most would call ‘pointless pursuits’. What went through the minds of a genius was unknown and what they worked on didn’t always make sense to the rest of the world. Many called the original ideas of geniuses pointless such as the wright brother’s insistence on flying. Doodling was also a common past time; it was hard to keep everything in.

An interesting quirk that Dr. Collins mentioned was that a large portion of geniuses were known to be left handed, blue eyed or both. Carl Sager was blue eyed, so was Stephen Hawking. Albert Einstein was left-handed.

The last thing Dr. Collins said was that due to Niall's IQ level there was no telling what the lad was capable of. Just beucase Niall's shown efficiency in science with the rocket and the telescope didn't mean that it was all he was capable of. Niall had also shown a basic understanding of psychology and he was obviously musically talented. Liam and Zayn had thrown in that Niall was an amazing artist both drawing and building at least using playdough. Also looking at the fact that Niall spoke spanish and - given that he hides everything and is hesitant to even speak spanish - that the boy could know more languages than that. Dr. Collins said that Niall could exceed at anything.

After explaining everything the best he could (which wasn’t much) Dr. Collins excused himself and left Liam and Zayn to explain things to Liam and Harry while he talked to Simon.


	32. Anxiety

I have good news and bad news. The good news is that I'm now on break and have a little time to write so there should be updates for the next couple of days. The bad news is that I'm leaving town on Monday to visit my brother, his wife and my nephew and I won't be back until late Friday evening. I'll possibly update during that time but it's extremely doubtful. Still what can you do? 

Next: I need ideas as to what Niall and the boys can do on the island during their two month break. I need things that they can do as a family and when their families come to visit. I want them to be able to stay out of the public eye though so nothing too crowded please. Thank you. Please enjoy.

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Niall woke up screaming. It wasn’t really surprising that he’d had a nightmare; he’d actually been expecting it. As of late Niall’s nightmares had been tapering down but with the IQ test and the boys now knowing exactly how smart he was – well… it was bound to happen. First time he’s had a nightmare during his nap though.

Niall knew as soon as they had told him what the test was for that everything was going to change. Now that the boys knew the truth they wouldn’t want anything to do with him anymore; no one ever did once they knew.

Niall’s first week officially living on the streets (this not including all the nights that he’d had to find someplace else to sleep when he was kicked out) hadn’t been that bad. He had managed to get over to the largest city around and had found a group of about seven other kids who were already living on the streets. Niall had stayed with them for over a month before they found out that he was smarter than he said.

They’d all been hanging around the local bar – best place to ‘pick up’ some ‘loose’ cash considering most of the patrons were young adults in college and inebriated. A few of the college kids had noticed them and started to push them towards the alley in order to ‘encourage’ them to leave. The college pricks had been on them about being stupid and useless and somehow it had turned to either they can answer a few trivia questions or they get the crap beat out of them.

Niall had been trying to protect the others – he’d never thought it would end the way it did. Despite the college kids attempts to stump him Niall had been able to answer every single question asked and then some. In fact Niall had made the older boys look like morons. When they had finally turned and left Niall had looked back at his friends happily thinking that he’d done well.

The other kids hadn’t been as pleased as Niall had expected. By the end of the night Niall had limped away with a sprained ankle, two black eyes, one eye almost swollen shut, covered in bruises and a cracked, possibly broken rib. At thirteen years old Niall was completely alone in the world. Three years later he went on x-factor.

To say Niall knew the dangers of showing his intelligence was an understatement; he knew full well what this revelation will bring him.

Despite all his protests Niall would be the last to admit that he actually liked age play. There were a lot of aspects that he still despised the nappies, cot, playpen, highchair, etc; he actually did like all the attention and affection he received. It was the first time in his life that he’d ever had anyone actually care about him let alone cuddle him and make sure he was happy and healthy.

In retrospect Niall couldn’t help but think that it would be easier to have just been left alone because now that the boys knew they wouldn’t want anything to do with him. All of that love and affection would be gone and Niall would be fully aware of what he was missing. He’d break and he knew it.

“Baby?” Zayn asked as he bounced Niall a little trying to break the boy out of his trance. Niall looked scared and Zayn couldn’t blame him.

Niall looked at Zayn, he looked… concerned? Why would Zayn be concerned? Maybe because he didn’t know how he would break this to Niall. Well, Niall had enough experience to know how this worked, “It’s alright. I understand”

“Understand what love?” Liam asked as Zayn laid Niall down and he started to change the lad’s soiled nappy.

Niall sighed, “I’m sorry I screwed up”

Liam and Zayn were quick to reassure the teary lad. It took the rest of the day before Niall truly believed that the age play wouldn’t cease however no one was able to convince him that his intelligence was alright. Simon popped by the following day and gave it his best shot but even he had no success. Niall truly believed that they would stop loving him if he showed his true self.

The rest of their time in the country was… strange. Niall didn’t say much outside of interviews and concerts; it was reminiscent of the beginning, when they’d realized their mistakes. This time though instead of shying away from the boys and refusing help of any kind Niall was allowing the boys to do everything for him and he refused to be away from Liam or Zayn for more than ten minutes.

Niall no longer asked for alone time – ironically enough now that he didn’t want it Liam and Zayn were trying to encourage it because Dr. Collins had said it was good for him. Niall no longer showed any desire in feeding himself and pushed his fork towards Liam or Zayn instead. Niall wouldn’t let go of Stitch with the exception of bath time where he was given no choice (the stuffie remaining in a plastic bag whenever the boy was eating). One might view these changes as an improvement; Niall actually accepting the age play. In some ways it was, but more than anything it had the boys worried.

Niall didn’t play anymore. He didn’t show interest in anything other than Stitch, his dummy, Liam and Zayn. Niall had nightmares every time he slept unless either Liam or Zayn stayed with him the entire time. Niall wouldn’t speak to anyone other than the two boys and refused to say anything unless they were alone.

Dr. Collins said that Niall was going through severe separation anxiety and that it was made worse by the IQ test. He also mentioned that they should have waited until Niall was more comfortable but without knowing about the boy’s past it was a difficult decision to make. Unfortunately Niall absolutely refused to talk to Dr. Collins despite the man’s persistent tries. Eventually Dr. Collins suggested finding a new Dr. that Niall didn’t have any negative connotations towards – the IQ test had destroyed any possible chance of trust that Niall had with the man. Simon had promised then a new Dr. once they were on break seeing as they only had one more day anyhow.

The last day was simple enough. They had an early concert and then they were all loaded onto the plane. The boys would fly to the island of Rapa Nui or Easter Island, as it’s better known. Simon had purchased a vacation home for them there that was right up to their own private beach and was ten miles from the nearest town (five of those miles being their own property as well) in any direction.

The boys had climbed onto the plane quickly and had managed to get Niall to sit in his own seat during take off. The second the plane was fully in the air Niall unstrapped his seatbelt and bolted to Liam.

“Hey there little man” Liam greeted Niall as the lad made himself comfortable on Liam’s lap.

Niall looked around the cabin to make sure it was just him and his band mates before speaking up, “missed you Mummy” he said wrapping his arms around Liam.

That was another new thing; Niall was initiating almost all of the physical contact now. It’s not that the other boys wouldn’t do it; it’s just that Niall always beats them to the punch.

“I was only right across the aisle love” Liam assured the boy in his lap.

Niall shrugged, “Too far”

“I’ll never leave you baby. I promise” Liam said kissing Niall’s hair. Dr. Collins had suggested working on little separations, such as the one they just had, in order to get Niall more comfortable with being apart. Also it was good to praise and assure Niall every time, “You did really well though; sitting there by yourself”

Niall sighed; he didn’t like Dr. Collins or his ideas, “Stitch?”

“I’ve got him” Zayn smiled holding up said toy.

Niall smiled wide and reached out one hand for his friend while keeping the other one securely around his Mummy – he wouldn’t want to loose her now would he? His smile faded however when he realized that his Daddy wasn’t moving. “Stitch please”

“I think you have to go and get it love,” Liam said softly.

Niall frowned. Why would he have to go and get Stitch? His Mum and Dad always brought Stitch to him. His Daddy was all the way on the other end of the plane; he’d have to let Mummy go in order to get to his friend. Why were they doing this? Maybe Mummy was wrong; maybe Daddy just didn’t understand, “Bring Stitch please” he asked sweetly, flashing his best smile and puppy dog eyes.

Zayn’s heart just about melted at his baby’s cuteness but still, he had to be strong. Niall’s separation anxiety was really bad and even carried over onto the stage. That morning at the concert Niall had absolutely refused to move farther than arms length away from either Zayn or Liam. If one boy needed to go off to another part of the stage then the two would have to come together first so that they could ‘hand off’ their little boy. The choreography had been shot but they’d still managed to put on a great show.

“You can have Stitch; you just need to come and get him” Zayn informed his boy.

Niall about had tears in his eyes at that statement and he clung to his Mummy tighter, “No you come”

Liam’s heart just about broke; he hated doing this to his little boy but it was only for the best. “Ni, it’s alright. Your Daddy and I are right here on this plane with you, so are Uncle Harry and Uncle Liam and no one is going anywhere. Your Daddy’s just twenty feet away with Stitch.”

“But what if something happens?” Niall asked turning his teary eyes to his Mummy. In truth Niall’s greatest fear was that if he let them both go at the same time then they’ll realize how better things were without having him to care for and abandon him. The hardest thing to conquer was that it wasn’t an empty fear – both of his biological parents had done just that. Not that he’d ever tell this to his Mummy and Daddy though, no, that wouldn’t be safe.

“Nothing’s going to happen” Liam assured, “You’ll be able to see me the whole time. You’ll be watching your Daddy get closer with every step you take and then when you reach him you’ll have your Stitch”

Without giving Niall any further time to protest Liam stood the boy up and encouraged him on his way. Zayn started calling for Niall the second he was on his feet and Niall just stood there in fear.

Niall really, really wanted his friend and to be with his Daddy but at the same time it would mean going quite far away from his Mummy. Since his nightmare after the IQ test Niall had never been more than a foot away from at least one of his parents. He didn’t like this. He really didn’t like this. But he wanted his friend!

He turned back to look at his Mummy and received a kind gesture forward; turning to look at his Daddy he saw open arms, a warm smile and his friend. Decision made, albeit painfully, Niall took a step towards his Daddy.

It took thirty minutes, a lot of prompting and encouragement and a massive amount of tears but eventually Niall had reached his destination.

The second that Niall was within arms reach he grabbed onto his Daddy for dear life. Zayn happily scooped his baby boy up into his arms and praised him. All the boys surrounded Niall telling them how proud they were of him and how good he’d done; it really was a massive step forward though they still had a long way to go.

“Stitch?” Niall asked again once everyone had calmed down.

“Of course” Zayn said as he whipped out the toy and handed it off. Once Zayn had a free hand again he pulled out Niall’s dummy, knowing it would be asked for in mere moments anyway, and clipped it to the boy’s shirt before slipping it into Ni’s mouth.

Niall accepted the dummy readily having grown to enjoy the comfort that the item always seemed to bring. He happily sat on his Daddy’s lap with his Stitch while watching movies the rest of the plane ride. There was a small fit when it came time to land because once again the boys placed Niall in an aisle across from Liam but Niall came through it well enough.

Once they landed everyone looked around in amazement. Easter Island was incredible. The air strip they’d landed in was small, private (really everything was private when you’re on an island with a total population of 5,761) and allowed the boys room to breath. It was an hour and a half ride from the airport to their new vacation house which allowed the boys plenty of time to watch the scenery pass by.

Niall was extremely excited as he saw all of the trees and open fields. There was ocean everywhere, which excited him because he loved to be in the water.

The weather was amazing. It was always perfect, the temperature being between 18 degrees Celsius (64 Fahrenheit) and 28 degrees Celsius (82 Fahrenheit). The beach was always available and they were told that they had a private indoor pool as well.

 

There was a massive wall surrounding their property, which kept gawkers, fans, and paps out and allowed them complete privacy. The property was also 25 square miles, which meant that they had a lot of space that they could explore without having to be shadowed by bodyguards. It was a change for all the boys seeing as they were almost constantly being guarded by someone – they were looking forward to having actual privacy. The best part of it all was that Paul and Simon had informed them incorrectly; they did not have a two-week break between this leg and the next they had a two-month break. They had two months in paradise.


	33. The House

All the boys walked into the house excitedly and looked around. The house was massive with two stories. On the first floor was the kitchen with a double oven; granite counter tops all of the nicest appliances. The kitchen also had a breakfast area by a big bay window with a nice table that had a bench seat on one side and a few chairs on the other. There was also a Stitch themed high chair for Niall and in the cupboards there were bibs and bottles.

Next was the living room where there was a massive 70 inch screen surrounded by game stations, video games, and every possible movie one could need including every Disney movie ever made – Niall even noted that there was every Stitch movie plus the show that went with it. There were couches and recliners and a Stitch themed play mat as well as a Stitch toy box (Simon really went all out with Stitch) that was filled to the brim with toys for the little one. Also there was a Stitch baby swing made especially for little Nialler.

There was a sitting room near the front. There were a couple of bookcases and a lot of places to sit and talk. There was a Stitch playpen with lots of toys and books to keep Niall occupied so that he would be able to be with everyone but didn’t have to participate in the conversations unless he wanted to. Also on that floor was a library and a music room where the boys would be able to work if they so choose.

The last area on the ground floor was the one that Niall loved most. They had an indoor pool! They could go swimming whenever they wanted!

“Swimming Mummy!” Niall jumped excitedly in Liam’s hold.

Liam chuckled, “Sorry love not today. It’s already too late”

“Swimming!” Niall repeated with a slight wine.

“Niall” Zayn said in warning.

Niall looked over at Zayn and pouted but knew better than to fight with that voice. If he argued his Daddy would put him in time out and then he’d be away from them – he couldn’t be away from them. So instead Niall just turned his head and buried it in his Mummy’s chest pouting.

“Let’s go explore the rest of the house shall we?” Harry suggested.

“I bet I can find my room faster than you can find yours” Louis said.

“You’re on” Harry agreed and the two ran off laughing.

Zayn and Liam followed after at a slower pace wanting to take everything in. They came to Zayn’s room first and it was perfect for him. The room was a basic solid color with the bed spread just a darker version of the walls. There was a drawing desk up against he far wall facing a large window. There was a 40 inch screen with video games underneath and a desk with a laptop on the opposite wall. There was a in suite bathroom with a walk in closet.

Next was Liam’s room (Niall’s room having been sandwiched between the two). Like Zayn’s it was obvious this room was made especially for Liam. Like with Zayn’s room the walls and bedding were the same color just different shades. There was a boxing dummy and a punching bag in the room along with a guitar and then a desk with a laptop. All in all it was everything Liam would want.

Lastly they went into Niall’s room and the first thing they heard was a very excited cry of “STITCH!” coming from their little boy.

Simon had over done it a bit with the Stitch theme here in Zayn’s opinion but Niall seemed perfectly happy so he let it be. The room itself had two walls covered in floor to ceiling windows with Stitch curtains that were currently pulled to the side. There was a table and chairs set up by the window and next to that was a small shelving unit filled with play dough, clay, crayons, paper, colored pencils and any other child art supplies that one could ever need. There was a bookshelf shaped like a spaceship filled with children and picture books and there were stuffies on shelves spread out around the room. The crib and the changing table were up against the one wall that doesn’t face the windows so that the sun wouldn’t wake Niall in the morning. There was a stitch blue couch and a stitch blue rocking chair in the room. The bedding was all stitch and there was even a stitch pillow pet on the bed as well as a stitch blanket. The bathroom had a massive tub (no shower) that swamped Niall and was surrounded with bath toys – even bath crayons.

“So do you like it?” Liam asked.

“Yes!” Niall exclaimed looking around. He wanted to try out his new art supplies and other toys but he didn’t want to leave his Mummy and Daddy. Maybe they would play with him? “Want to color?”

“Well love your Daddy and I are going to change into something warmer but you’re welcome to sit and color” Liam said gently.

“NO” Niall said immediately and clung tighter to his Mummy.

Liam sighed and looked over to Zayn. ‘Help’ he mouthed.

Zayn moved over and lifted Niall’s chin up so that they were looking at each other before speaking, “I’m going to go and change then I’ll be back and change you while your Mummy goes and gets changed. We can get something to eat after that”

Niall nodded hesitated. He hadn’t actually been away from both of his parents in a while. If he was with either his Mum or his Dad the other was always in his sight even if he couldn’t necessarily reach them. He wasn’t so sure he liked this idea, “No”

“I’m sorry love but it’s not really a choice” Zayn said sadly. He hated doing this but they did need to get Niall used to the fact that they would always come back – Dr. Collins had said it was something that they needed to assure the boy of. “I’ll be back in five minutes” he said as he showed Niall exactly when that would be on the wall clock in the room.

“No” Niall said again but it didn’t matter as Zayn was already gone. Niall’s eyes welled up with tears which soon found their way down his face, “Daddy left” he whimpered into Liam’s chest.

“Oh no baby he didn’t leave he just went to go and change clothes. Daddy will be back in… four minutes” Liam tried to assure the distraught lad.

Niall just shook his head and cried. He had known this would happen – it always happened. Why didn’t anybody want to stay with him? Why didn’t anybody want to love him? Was he really so bad? What had he done?

Liam was desperate for Zayn to return. He knew that this was important for Niall and that in the end it would be for the best but right now it felt as though they were torturing the poor lad and he’d already had enough of that in his life. Liam walked around the room as he bounced Niall and whispered assurances in his baby’s ears but nothing seemed to be working.

Thankfully Zayn returned in only four and a half minutes, “Hey there baby”

“Daddy!” Niall pleaded as he reached for Zayn.

“Come here baby boy” Zayn said taking his little one into his arms, “See I told you I’d be back”

“Don’t ever leave again” Niall insisted as he wrapped himself around Zayn as tight as he could.

Zayn didn’t comment on that fact as he walked Niall over to the changing table while simultaneously signaling Liam to go out behind his back. Liam hesitated for a moment before going to change. They were all wearing jeans and long sleeve shirts seeing as the country they’d just come from was cold but here on Easter Island it was rather warm and shorts and t-shirts would be better.

“You have to be burning up” Zayn commented as he laid Niall out and strapped him in.

Niall grabbed a hold of his Stitch as he watched his Daddy gather up some clothes. When Zayn stepped away to the closet for a moment Niall became nervous and looked around for his Mummy but Liam wasn’t there!

Niall was scared. His Mummy had left and he hadn’t noticed! His Daddy had left and he couldn’t see either of his parents. They’d just left him strapped to the changing table and walked off. He knew something like this would happen if he let them out of his sight. As the old saying goes ‘out of sight out of mind’.

“Oh baby what’s wrong?” Zayn asked coming back into the room with a Stitch t-shirt and a Stitch nappy (really Simon?).

Niall stared at Zayn, “You left again”

“No baby I just went to get you some clothes I’m sorry” Zayn tried to sooth.

“Mummy left” Niall continued to sob.

“Mummy just went to change love. He’ll be back shortly” Zayn continued to sooth. As he was talking Zayn removed Niall’s clothes and soiled nappy. “Hey look what Uncle Si got you” he said holding up the Stitch nappy and shirt.

Niall continued to cry but he did look over at what his Daddy was holding up. “St… Stitch” he chocked out.

“Yeah baby, Stitch” Zayn smiled trying hard to get his little one to perk up.

Niall clutched onto his Stitch stuffie as he laid still for his Daddy to change him while his crying slowed down.

Zayn finished getting Niall dressed in his nappy and t-shirt and then found a dummy clip and decided to make his life a little easier. Niall frowned down at the clip but didn’t say anything and accepted the dummy when it was placed to his lips, sucking happily.

Zayn carried Niall down to the kitchen where Liam, Louis and Harry were already waiting debating on what they were going to have for supper.

“Baby’s here!” Louis cheered as he got up and ran over to take the little man.

Niall hesitated and shrunk into Zayn but didn’t put up a fuss when Louis took him.

“So what would you like for supper?” Louis asked the pouting boys in his arms.

“I wa…” Niall started but then stopped. Should he say what he wanted? What would be the point? No one ever cared what he wanted.

“What is it baby?” Liam asked. All the boys were trying to get Niall to show an interest in something other than clinging to them and watching movies.

“Well… what’s the options” Niall asked hesitantly.

Liam looked to Zayn. He didn’t particularly care what Niall asked for so long as he asked for something. Asked for anything! It was still early so if Niall wanted cake and ice cream it would be alright, he’d have time to run it off.

“Anything you want” Liam said after an agreeable nod from Zayn.

Niall perked up at that, “Really?”

“Really” Zayn smiled.

“Waffle pancakes!” Niall cheered. All the boys froze, what the hell were waffle pancakes?

Deciding that they were all in over their heads and seeing as only one of them were bakers they turned to the man they thought would have the answers. “Harry?” Liam, Louis and Zayn asked.

“Um…” Harry thought. He was wracking his brain trying to figure out what a waffle sandwich might be.

Niall waited impatiently in Louis’ arms for the boys to start getting the ingredients out however they were just standing there staring at each other. Deciding to take matters into his own hands Niall squirmed around until Louis got the hint and placed the boy on his feet.

Instantly Niall grabbed ahold of his Daddy’s arm and pulled him along to the freezer. Zayn looked over at the other boys confused but went along with it as Niall started loading down his arms with freezer waffles and ice cream followed by chocolate syrup, chocolate chips, caramel syrup and whipped cream.

Once Niall had everything he wanted he dragged his Daddy over to the toaster and unloaded the man’s arms. Niall then held up the box of waffles to his Daddy expectantly because he wasn’t allowed to use the toaster.

Still confused but becoming slightly less so with each passing minute Zayn took the box of waffles and put some in the toaster. As soon as they were done he pulled them out and on a plate before repeating the process.

Niall pulled out paper plates and placed a waffle on it before handing Zayn the ice cream scoop and the chocolate ice cream. Once again Zayn took the hint and scooped some ice cream onto the waffle. When Niall decided there was enough ice cream he took a second waffle and placed it on top before decorating it with the chocolate and caramel syrup and chocolate chips.

As soon as his masterpiece was finished he held it up proudly for all the boys to see, “Waffle sandwich”

All the boys looked around at each other, “Oh”

“Looks good to me” Louis said as he walked over and made one for himself.

Liam shook his head, his kid could be so adorable sometimes. “Lets get you in your chair and let you enjoy your supper shall we?” he said picking Niall up and strapping the distracted boy into the highchair before cutting up the waffle sandwich and picking up a fork to feed his boy.

 

The rest of the day went by nicely. Everyone had to agree that waffle sandwiches were good if not a bit sugary. Still though it was actually a good idea. Niall was so sugar happy that he was bouncing off the walls and actually moved away from Liam and Zayn. Niall slept in his crib that night! The question was what would happen in the morning when the boy was calmer?


	34. Playing the Piano

Niall woke up and rolled over fully expecting to run into his Mum but what he found instead was something cushioned but solid, what? Opening his eyes he practically burst into tears when he saw that he was in his cot. Why was he in his cot? Why wasn't he sleeping with his Mum or Dad? He always slept with one of them. Had he done something wrong?

 

Niall frantically looked around his cot hoping that maybe one of his parents were with him or at least next to the cot. Sadly no, Niall was all-alone. Niall whimpered slightly, he didn't want to be alone. As he started shifting around trying to stand his hand ran into his friend. 

"Stitch!" Niall exclaimed, "You stayed"

Niall hurriedly snatched Stitch and clutched him close, "I'll never let you go" he assured. "I'll never forget you or get tired of you even if I'm busy, I promise" Niall sighed as he held Stitch, "I screwed up. I was too bad. Mummy and Daddy left me again" Niall told his friend. "Why do people always leave me? What did I do that was so bad? I promise I didn't mean it" he started crying.

Liam and Zayn both had baby monitors in their room and found themselves in tears as they bumped into each other as they ran to their baby boy. 

"We're right here baby" Zayn said as he picked Niall out of the cot.

"We're never leaving you honey, we never would" Liam promised as he joined Zayn in comforting their little boy.

Niall was amazed that they had come back. They hadn't left! They hadn't forgot him! He was ecstatic, He wrapped his arms and legs around his daddy and refused to let go.

Five hours later and Niall still refused to let go of his parents. Zayn and Liam felt horrible, they hadn't known that their baby felt this way; it broke their heart. After everything the two had thought that Niall was starting to trust them; to believe that they would never abandon him. Guess none of them truly understood how deep Niall's wounds went.

At lunch Niall burst into tears when he was forcibly removed from his Mummy's lap and strapped into his highchair. Thankfully they allowed Stitch to stay with him - not that they had much of a choice seeing as it was either let the lad keep the toy or Stitch looses an arm. Niall steadfastly refused all food that his Mum and Dad tried to feed him even going so far as accidentally knocking a spoonful onto the floor.

"I'm sorry" Niall exclaimed in tears once again.

"It's alright love" Liam tried to reassure. He knew that Niall hadn't done it on purpose; he'd just been shaking his head no at the same time Zayn was trying to bring the spoon to his mouth. It had been bound to happen sometime. 

Zayn sighed and wiped the bit of potato from his cheek before giving in. "Tell you what, how about a bottle and a nap?" he asked his little one.

Niall hesitated before nodding and reaching his arms up for his Daddy to take him. If he held onto his Daddy long enough and hard enough then he would have someone to sleep on. And someone there when he woke up. 

Zayn fixed the bottle before taking Niall out of his highchair. Zayn could see the confusion in his boy but he also knew that Niall needed to get used to small separations. "Ready?" he asked once he had the bottle made – having made sure to add a bit of nutren so that Niall would get some calories at lunch. His baby really was too thin despite the fact that they'd been doing their best to feed him. Another drawback that came with the separation anxiety was that Niall had been steadily decreasing the amount he ate and all the boys were trying to remedy that.

Niall clung to his Daddy as Zayn picked him up. As they settled on the couch Niall couldn't help but wonder why it had taken Zayn so long to get him? Why hadn't Zayn just picked him up when he got up to make the bottle? His Daddy always held him while making his bottles, what was so different about today? Had he done something wrong?

"You're so good baby" Zayn said as he put the bottle to Niall's lips, "You're my perfect baby boy"

Niall begrudgingly accepted the bottle knowing that if he didn't there would be one hell of a fight and would most likely end with him in trouble. He didn't want to get into trouble, didn't want to give his Mum or Dad any reason to be mad at him. 

As Zayn had expected the little one was out cold after having finished his bottle; warm milk never failed to put his baby to sleep. Knowing that Niall wouldn't be too happy about it but also that it was for the best, Zayn carried Niall to his cot and tucked him in. It was important for Niall to know that Zayn and Liam wouldn't forget him again, that they'd always be there for him. 

After having heard Niall over the baby monitor this morning Zayn knew that Niall was still afraid of being forgotten but more worrisome was that Niall blamed himself and not those that had abandoned him. The Dr. had said that the best way for Niall to get over his fears was to prove that they would return. Now that Niall had slept in his cot once Zayn wasn't about to let him backslide.

Not long after Zayn and Niall disappeared upstairs Liam received a call from Simon. Apparently the new psychiatrist would be coming in three hours for Niall's first appointment. Liam sighed but knew that it had to be done; Niall needed to talk to someone who could help him. After talking to Simon for a while Liam hung up the phone and went to see how Zayn was doing with their little one.

"How is he?" Liam asked.

Zayn sighed, "He's down but he won't be happy when he wakes up"

"No kidding" Liam scoffed, "His new therapist is coming in three hours"

"You're kidding"

"Nope"

Zayn groaned but nodded. It was what was best for Niall – that's all that mattered.

 

Three hours later found a grumpy and clingy Niall holding Stitch and his Mummy. Harry and Louis had agreed to find a different part of the house to spend their time in while Niall had his session. Zayn and Liam had been trying to placate Niall but the boy just wasn't having it. 

Niall for his part was pissed. He despised therapists of any kind. Niall knew enough about psychology to understand the basic job of a psychiatrist. From what he'd been able to surmise the job of a psychiatrist was to find what your problems are and then load them down with medication in order to solve it. Everything could be solved with enough medication. Only catch – Niall would never take anything, he would fight it until his dying breath.

Zayn was on his feet the second the knock was heard. "Hello"

"Hello, I'm Dr. Fredericks" the new man greeted holding out his hand.

"Zayn. What do you say we move into the living room?"

"Actually" the Dr. hesitated, "I want to talk to Niall alone. In a separate room"

Zayn froze and Liam gripped onto his baby tighter, "I would prefer if we all stayed together" Zayn told the man tightly.

"And I have already discussed this with Mr. Cowell and he has agreed that Niall and I will be allowed to talk privately" The Dr. stated as he held out a note from Simon to the boys saying as such.

Liam frowned and pulled out his phone, "He didn't mention it when we talked earlier"

"Then by all means" Dr. Fredericks smirked gesturing towards the phone in Liam's hand, "Give Mr. Cowell a call and disrupt his meetings because you feel that your new shrink is a quackpot old fool"

"It's crackpot," Zayn corrected tersely. He knew as well as Liam did that Simon didn't like to be disturbed while in meetings especially not during ones with management. 

Glaring at the new Dr. Liam stood Niall on his feet, "Love your Daddy and I will be right here OK. We won't leave"

Niall clutched his Mummy's hand and shook his head no. He did not want to leave with this... quackpot as the man had put it. 

"Baby you need to go with Dr. Fredericks" Zayn tried as he slowly pried Niall off of Liam.

"Here, we won't be needing these" the Dr. said as he undid the dummy clip and took Stitch away from Niall then handed the items to Liam.

Both Liam and Zayn were heartbroken as they watched their baby boy follow Dr. Fredericks out of the room with tears running down his face. It killed them to allow this to happen but they had no choice and they knew it. Simon had agreed to this for whatever reason and they had to follow Simon's orders in this matter. Simon had placed himself in charge of Niall's therapy ever since the topic had been discussed – he still held some... irritation with the boys after what they'd done to Niall.

Niall followed the... quack down the hall and into the music room. He slowly found himself feeling more... alert than he had in days. It felt as though his head was coming out of a fuzz. The further he moved away from the others the clearer his mind became and the less he felt the need to attach himself to Liam and Zayn and the stronger the desire became to just run out the back door into the woods alone.

"So..." Dr. Fredericks paused, "I know that you're not happy about being made to talk to me and I know that you're upset I made you leave your band mates. But you must believe me it's all in order to do what's best for you."

Niall scoffed and looked around the room. This wasn't what was best for him this is what the others thought was best for him. What did they know? What made them so much more knowledgeable than he was about his own body? His own mind? Did they not say he was immeasurable intelligent, that he had one of the highest IQs ever recorded? Why was it then that he was viewed as incapable of taking care of himself, of deciding things for himself?

Dr. Fredericks just stood back and watched as Niall scoffed at him and then wondered around the room. He wanted to talk to Niall the 21 year old and see how that Niall would act. His whole reasoning for separating Niall from the others was so that he could work with 'adult' Niall. Leaving the lad with those who were taking care of him would do nothing but allow Niall to stay hidden. The best way to help Niall would be to talk to him on his terms.

It hadn't taken long for Niall to find the piano bench and sit down. Naturally when one is at the piano they tend to tap a few keys. Dr. Fredericks listened as Niall played; it was truly astounding. As far as the Dr. could tell Niall wasn't playing any known song just whatever he felt like; whatever was in his heart.   
"I'm here to talk to you about anything you want. I have no agenda to adhere to" Dr. Fredericks started once it seemed as though Niall had calmed down a bit.  
Niall turned to look at the quack then, shaking his head "you're not here to talk you're here to diagnose"

So this was Niall, "I'm here to talk and help nothing more"

Niall turned back to the piano then, mindlessly playing – not even paying attention to what he was doing. "No one ever wants to just talk"

"I thought your band mates talked to you all the time?" Dr. Fredericks asked.

Niall shrugged, "They talk about mindless things. What to watch, what to wear, what to eat, nothing of real importance."

The Dr. nodded taking in Niall's answer while listening to the music, it was light, fun but not joyful. "And what about others?"

"What others?" Niall asked.

"Your brother Greg perhaps" Dr. Fredericks suggested.

The music started to take on a deeper tone, Niall using lower notes. "We didn't talk much"

"Your father?"

Again a change in the tune; it became slightly slower. "He was rarely around"

"Your mother?"

The music became low and cold. "Never spoke"

"And..." Dr. Fredericks hated to say this but wanted to understand how everyone fell into this, "your uncle?"

Instantly the music became dark and angry but if Dr. Fredericks were to hazard a guess he would say there was also a decent bit of fear mixed in. Niall didn't respond to this question.

They went on like that for another hour. The Dr. asking broad questions while Niall played. 

Niall remained silent throughout the questioning, refusing to speak to quack. Still though; as far as talking to a psychiatrist went this wasn't as bad as it could be. Maybe the quack wasn't horrible. Niall smirked to himself there – quack really was an amusing name. But it wasn't a name though it was a sound. A quack was a sound a duck made. 

Once the hour was up Liam and Zayn came bursting into the music room. They were surprised to see Niall at the piano – they hadn't known he could play but sadly they were learning that they really didn't know too much about Niall and his abilities.

"Hey love" Liam said as he sat next to his boy and pulled him close.

Niall didn't say anything just sat there complacently. It worried Liam and Zayn a bit because typically Niall would cling to them – not this time though. 

"I'll see you in a couple of days then Niall" Dr. Fredericks said standing up to leave.

"See ya Ducky" Niall replied.

"Ducky?" Liam and Zayn asked together confused. Who the hell was Ducky?

"I believe he means me" the Dr. explained.

"Why is he calling you Ducky?" Zayn asked annoyed. He and Liam completely agreed that they did not like this new therapist.

"You'll have to ask him" Dr. Fredericks shrugged and then showed himself out.

Liam and Zayn did try to get Niall to tell them what had happened, what they'd talked about but the lad remained stubbornly mute. 

As the rest of the day progressed all the boys were trying to decide which was worse. A clingy baby Niall or this mute, subdued, reclusive Niall who had demanded some alone time not ten minutes after the psychiatrist left and then had remained unattached. Niall wasn't even accepting his Stitch or his dummy.  
Liam tucked Niall into his cot that night after practically forcing the boy to drink at least half of his bottle. The second Niall was out Liam and Zayn called Simon demanding a new therapist. They didn't win but they did receive permission to be in all of Niall's future appointments so long as they stayed to the side and didn't interfere.


	35. Love

The following morning Niall was the first one up, he rubbed his eyes as he sat upright. He rubbed his eyes as he looked around the room. It was funny, he could remember being so excited when he first saw this place but now; well now Niall didn’t really know what to feel about the place. He liked all the art supplies and he did appreciate all the effort that Simon put into making this room as nice as it is but it was for a baby. 

Niall wasn’t a baby, no matter what the others said or did (he choose at this point to ignore the soiled nappy he was currently wearing). Yes he knew that he had been clingy with Liam and Zayn lately but he just didn’t want to be forgotten again, was that so unreasonable? Maybe it was; after all everyone else forgot about him or worse. Maybe being forgotten about was just the best result for him. Maybe the best chance he had was to just forget them instead. Yes that would be the best.

With his mind made up Niall knew what he had to do –leave. 

Shifting around as quietly as he could so as not to wake Liam or Zayn Niall ran his hand over something important. Grasping onto the item Niall held his friend close and hugged him before turning Stitch over. After Liam had started locking his cot at night Niall had snuck a pin and hid it in his friend for emergencies. Now was just such an emergency.

After extricating himself from the cot Niall took his only friend and packed a bag before changing and sliding out of the room. It was surprisingly easy to get out of the house – the lack of a security staff was truly mind-boggling after over four years of being constantly guarded. With one last look back at the house Niall and Stitch made their way towards the forests. Niall knew that there would be security at the entrance to their property however there was unlikely to be anyone at the wall in the middle of the forest, that’s where he would get out.  
Liam woke up around eight fully surprised that he’d been able to sleep so long, typically Niall would have been up long before this and his baby always came before sleep. After getting dressed Liam strode down the hall to get his little boy. 

Gently Liam cracked the door to the nursery open, not wanting to disturb Niall if he really was asleep. He about had a heart attack when he saw the cot open and empty. 

“ZAYN!”

Zayn jerked awake at the sound of his name being screamed from somewhere on the floor. He didn’t know who or why this unnamed person was had decided to waken him so early while they were on break but he planned on finding that person and making them regret it. That was until he heard the next two words.

“NIALL’S MISSING!”

Instantly Zayn found himself up and in the nursery, “Where is he?”

Liam looked at Zayn in disbelief, “If I knew where he was why would I have said he’s missing?!”

“Alright, calm down getting uptight isn’t going to help anything”

Liam took a deep breath, “He got out of his cot, I don’t know how, dressed, packed and left and I don’t know where he is”

“OK” Zayn took control, “You search for him outside while I’ll search inside. I’ll get Harry to check the left of the house, Louis the back and you can take the right”

Liam nodded his consent while he was racing towards the door to search for his wayward baby boy.

Everyone spent the next three hours searching for Niall and in this time said boy had made his way halfway through the forest. It frustrated Niall that he wasn’t going faster; he’d never had any issues traveling through the forest before. 

As Niall stepped on another rock he cursed, why did the boys have to remove the caules from his feet? Why was it so bad that he could move around barefoot? When he’d gotten dressed this morning he hadn’t thought to bring or pack shoes because he’d never had to before. Now he was regretting that decision.

Liam heard muffled noises a few feet in front of him. He’d been searching for hours now and was becoming extremely worried. Niall would be in a lot of trouble once Liam finally got his hands on the boy – after making sure that he was alright of course. The noises grew louder and Liam was fairly certain they were words of some kind though he still couldn’t ascertain exactly what was being said. Worry and excitement flowing through him Liam rushed towards the noises. 

“Niall” Liam exclaimed as soon as he laid eyes on his baby boy.

Niall jerked his head around, “Liam”

Liam closed the distance between the two of them in the blink of an eye and started searching the boy for any possible injuries. “Are you hurt? Are you alright? Ate you cut?”

“I’m fine” Niall squirmed trying to get out of Liam’s grasp.

Liam stopped his search when he found nothing, “You’re fine?”

“Yes” Niall huffed thoroughly annoyed that he had been found. Why had he been found? Why had Liam come to look for him?

Liam breathed a sigh of relief before his relief quickly turned to anger. Grabbing Niall’s arm he spun the boy around and landed five hard swats to his unpadded backside. “What the hell were you thinking?!” 

Niall gasped, he hadn’t expected that. “What?”

“Why. Did. You. Run. Off?”

“Why do you care?” Niall retorted. He didn’t get it. Why was Liam here?

Liam was stunned by the question; “I love you”

That seemed to be the break; the thing that set the bomb off because Niall went off, “You love me?” he screeched, “How can you love me?”   
Liam opened his mouth to answer but Niall didn’t give him the chance, “No one loves me! No one’s ever loved me! It’s impossible to love an experiment. A mistake. How the hell do you love something that was never meant to be?”

Niall could see the confused and hurt look and at this point didn’t truly care about his secrets. “Oh yes Liam, believe it or not I was a complete mistake. I was the result of a failed experiment” Niall gave a dead laugh at this, “One of their” 

Liam didn’t need to ask who Niall meant by ‘their’ it was his biological parents.

“Friends had asked them to test a new fool proof spray on condemn he’d invented. They should have known it wouldn’t work but they were drunk enough to try it anyway. Nine months later and their worthless mistake was born”

Liam couldn’t believe what he was hearing. Had Niall’s biological parents honestly informed their son of this? Told Niall that he was a failed experiment? Who the hell would lay that kind of guilt on their son? “Niall…”

“NO!” Niall screamed not at all done yet, “How can you love me? I’m nothing! Nothing more than a punching bag for her and Greg. Or a human experiment for her little food concoctions. Do you know what forcing someone who hasn’t eaten for five days consume ipecac does? I do. I know exactly what it does to a person. Did you know that the longest a seven year old can go without food is ten days before they pass out? Do you know how hard it is to eat something when you haven’t even tasted food for that long? How hard it is to keep the trash you’ve managed to pick out of the bin down?”

Liam had tears slowly rolling down his face and offered a weak, “No”

Niall didn’t seem to notice Liam’s answer however because he just kept on going. “Did you know that an eight year old can withstand fifty volts of electricity twenty-seven times before they pass out? Did you know it takes thirty-eight hits with the belt before I pass out?”  
Once again Liam gave a small “no” in response as more tears made their way down his face. He didn’t stop Niall however; he knew the boy needed to get this off his chest. Niall had been holding it in for so long.

“And then you want to know what my Uncle did?” Niall didn’t wait for a response, “I know what he did. I know what gas tastes like. I know that I’ve been drowned and revived a total of one hundred and eight times within the first ten years of my life. I know that I can survive eight days trapped in a dugout hole in the ground with only a single bottle of water. I know that it takes forty-six minutes for me to pass out when trapped in a bathroom filled with toxic gas. I know that after three consecutive hits with a baseball bat my ribs will break even with very little force.” Niall paused here, his breath hitching, “How can you love someone like that? How can you say you love me?”

The last question was so quiet that Liam almost didn’t hear it. He was brought out of his shock by that voice, one so defeated. “Oh baby” he said moving a slight step closer to Niall but not close enough to scare the lad. “I love you because you’re clever, funny, sweet, kind, adorable, perfect, creative, intelligent, and the most important thing in the world to me” Liam had moved closer with every word until he was within arms reach of his little boy.

Niall flinched when Liam grabbed him but all Liam was doing was bringing Niall into a hug. Liam held Niall tight refusing to let go no matter how the lad thrashed and gave promises and assurances the whole time.  
Eventually Niall just stopped and started sobbing. Liam instantly scooped Niall up into his arms and tried to calm him. Niall was crying so hard Liam was afraid he was going to make himself sick. After what felt like an eternity Niall eventually cried himself to sleep laying his head on Liam’s shoulder.

Once Niall was asleep Liam took out his phone and texted the others that he’d found Niall and was bringing him back. Liam realized that he should have told them sooner but didn’t really care at this point; all of his concern was for the little boy he held in his arms. The sad, tormented, broken little boy who had been through so much, too much, in his young life. How was Niall still going? Liam wasn’t so sure that he would have been as high functioning after the life Niall had.

Liam grabbed the backpack that Niall had dropped on the forest floor and shook his head when he note that Niall hadn’t bothered to wear any shoes, some habits were hard to break. Though he was dismayed and yet somewhat pleased to note that the souls of Niall’s feet were not as tough as they used to be. Sadly that meant that Niall had managed to break the skin in a few places and there was some blood. He’d have to make sure Niall kept off his feet for a little while until the abrasions healed.

As they walked Liam watched Niall slowly slide his thumb up to his mouth. Liam would have loved to exchange it for a dummy but unfortunately he hadn’t brought one along. Sighing, knowing there was nothing he could do to change it at the moment he just let it be and kept on walking.

About halfway home he felt something wet seep into his shirt. Of course Niall had removed his nappy.

 

Zayn waited impatiently with Harry and Louis. They had all received a group text from Liam saying that he’d found Niall however that was almost two hours ago and they still weren’t back yet.

“I see them!” Louis shouted from his spot by the back window.

Instantly all three were at the back door watching the pair arrive. Liam was walking towards the house with a sleeping Niall in his arms. As they got closer it became apparent that both Niall and Liam had been crying. What had happened?

“Liam?” Zayn asked.

“Not now” Liam insisted quietly as he bypassed all three of the boys and headed straight for the nursery.

Zayn, Louis and Harry all followed along desperate to know what was going on. What had happened between Liam and Niall out there? Why were they both crying?

Liam ignored the other three not fully aware of their presence; more focused on the little one he had just laid out on the changing table. Slowly he took off Niall’s damp shorts and his own top before cleaning the boy up and putting him in a nappy. Liam then skillfully switched Niall’s thumb for a dummy before taking off the lad’s top and dressing him in a light blue short-sleeve onesie.   
Once Niall was changed Liam searched around for Stitch knowing that his little boy adored the thing. Not finding what he was looking for in the cot Liam checked the backpack and couldn’t help but smile when he saw that Niall had taken his stuffed friend along with him.   
As he put the toy in Niall’s hands Liam felt a nudge from behind.

“Here mate” Harry offered holding out a clean shirt.

“Thanks” Liam nodded quietly.

Liam turned back to Niall then and pulled out a stitch themed blanket from off the bed before swaddling his little one. Once done Liam picked Niall up and moved over to the rocking chair. The others were asking him questions, trying to get him to talk but Liam couldn’t really make out what they were saying. He sat down and stared at his little boy, his amazing little boy and promised himself that he would do everything in his power to help Niall and that the lad would know that he would always be loved.


	36. Stitch

Niall felt slightly groggy as he woke up, he couldn’t believe he’d been so stupid – he’d screamed some of his secrets to Liam. His new Mum now knew so many stupid things he’d done. He’d confessed that he was a failed experiment – how could he have been so stupid.   
Regardless, he couldn’t change what he’d said – it was time to live with the consequences. Knowing that he wouldn’t be welcome back now Niall prepared himself for facing the empty woods alone, at least he still had Stitch. Stitch would never leave him. With that in mind Niall decided it was probably time to get up.

As he started to stir Niall brought his hand up to scrub at his eyes, or, he tired to. Niall opened his eyes immediately and he tried to sit up only to find that he couldn’t do that either. Starting to panic Niall barely registered the voice calling out his name.

“Niall” Liam called worriedly. The boy was thrashing around trying to get free of the blanket that Liam had swaddled him in. “Niall you need to relax”

Finally Niall heard Liam and froze. Liam had stuck around? Why would Liam have stayed out in the woods with him? Then he took it in, where he was, he wasn’t in the woods. He was in the nursery. Why was he here? Why was Liam holding him? Why couldn’t he move?

“I’m going to loosen the blanket alright?” Liam asked once he saw that Niall had calmed down. 

Liam waited for the boy to nod slightly before starting to loosen the blanket that Niall was encased in. As soon as his hands were free Niall jerked them up and away from the blanket, bringing Stitch with him. Liam couldn’t help but smile slightly at this.

“Why?” Niall asked after a couple of minutes to silence. The dummy fell out of his mouth and landed in his lap but no one seemed to notice in the pain of that one question.

“Why what love?” Liam asked patiently as he sat Niall up a little bit and started rubbing his back.

“Why am I here?”

Liam paused in his rubbing for a mere second before answering, “This is your room love”

OK, fine, “Why did you bring me here?”

Liam got it then, “Niall, I’ve told you this before and I will repeat it every single day from now until the day I die if that’s what it takes for you to believe it.” he paused here and was sure to get Niall’s complete attention before continuing, “I am so sorry that I ever ignored you and I give you my word that it will NEVER happen again. I will ALWAYS be here for you. I love you, my sweet baby boy”

Niall looked up at Liam, tears in his eyes, “I love you too Mummy” he whispered before rubbing his face against Liam’s chest as new tears started. It took him a minute but eventually he got his left ear situated over Liam’s heartbeat and he just sat there crying. Crying because of his past, because of his pain and because he was loved. For the first time in his life he was truly loved.

Liam was ecstatic; it was so rare that Niall said he loved him. It had only happened once before and the boy had been three seconds away from a deep sleep at the time. To hear Niall say it while fully awake and cognizant and after the day they’d just had bolstered Liam’s confidence more than he could say. They were doing the right thing; he was doing the right thing by his baby boy.

Liam just held Niall knowing that the boy needed to get this out, needed to stop burying it inside of him as he had been for so long. Liam couldn’t help but feel that he’d had a major breakthrough with Niall despite all the heartache that this day had caused so far. 

Eventually Niall calmed down and was just sitting there against Liam and clutching his Stitch. At some point Liam had retrieved the fallen dummy and slipped it back into Niall’s mouth. Once Liam was certain that Niall was calm he carried his baby over to the changing table and freed him from the rest of the blanket. Liam then proceeded to change Niall’s nappy before shutting the snaps at the crotch and looking down at his little one.

“Would you like to wear a pair of shorts or not?” Liam asked.

Niall thought on it for a moment. He didn’t really want to have his nappy exposed even though he knew that it was only he and the other boys on the property. The onesie didn’t do anything to hide his nappy; it actually made it rather obvious in Niall’s opinion. “Shorts please”  
Liam beamed down at Niall before pulling a pair of shorts out of one of the drawers beneath and slipping them up the boy’s legs. “All set then” Liam stated as he lifted Niall up, “Now. What would you like to do today?”

Niall hesitated, “I’m not in trouble?”

“No love. This one time you’re not in trouble” Liam assured him. How could Liam punish Niall after everything? He knew it was wrong to ignore such behavior but he just didn’t have the heart, not after what he’d heard. “I can’t say that I’ll let you out of my sight anytime soon and we will be getting electronic locks for the cot but otherwise no, you’re not in trouble”

“Ok then…” What did Niall want to do? He didn’t know. What did he need? Well he was a little hungry. “We can do anything?”

“Anything legal” Liam agreed.

“Can we…” would his Mummy go for it? “Get Uncle Harry to make a cake?”

Liam chuckled, at least it was something food related, his baby was really becoming far too skinny. “Alright so long as you eat a small bowl of oatmeal while it’s baking”

“Only if I get root beer with it” Niall countered.

“Deal”

“Deal”

Both boys smiled as Liam carried Niall down the stairs in search of Harry.

“Liam?” Zayn asked when he saw the man carrying Niall into the living room.

“Hey” Liam hesitantly replied. It occurred to him then that he hadn’t really explained anything to the others.

“Can we talk?” Harry asked.

“Yeah” Liam sighed, “I’ll meet you in the kitchen in a minute”

Louis, Harry and Zayn all nodded their consent and headed out of the room so as to give Liam and Niall a little privacy.

Liam turned to Niall; “I need to go talk to them for a moment love. Why don’t you take your alone time while I do so and then we can have oatmeal and cake”

“And root beer?” Niall checked.

“And root beer” Liam agreed.

“You’ll come back?”

“Promise”

“You’ll still love me?” 

Liam crushed Niall to him, “Always baby, I will always love you”

Niall didn’t remove himself from Liam nor did he make any indication of wanting to get away however Liam knew that he needed to talk to the other boys and it would be best not to do so in front of Niall. Still Liam didn’t want to leave Niall alone where he might be able to run off again. The only solution he had was to strap the boy into the playpen while he talked.

As soon as Niall saw the straps he started to fight, “NO”

“I don’t want you to run off again love” Liam tried to explain.

“I won’t” Niall pleaded, “I promise I won’t”

Liam paused. He had been working very hard to get Niall to trust him and believe his promises so shouldn’t he trust Niall as well? “Alright. However if I even see you try to get out of the playpen then you will be strapped in from now on understood?”

“Understood” Niall agreed relieved. He hated to be strapped in.

Sighing Liam nodded his head before grabbing Niall’s things out of the drawer. Niall didn’t typically take his alone time in the playpen but Liam just needed to know that his baby was someplace safe and secure – didn’t need the little one trying to run off again.

Liam handed the i-pod, headphones, notebook and pen to Niall but the lad just stared at them numbly, unmoving. “Don’t you want your things baby?”

Niall looked up at Liam, he didn’t really want his alone time right now, he wanted his mummy but didn’t really want to be apart of the conversation he knew would be happening. 

Liam watched Niall shake his head sadly just staring at him. “You don’t even want your music? You love your music”

“Please” Niall whimpered.

“Please what love?”

Tears started to slowly run down Niall’s face at that one word. He didn’t want to be alone. “Please” he begged again holding his arms up.  
Liam understood what Niall wanted. Instantly Liam had his baby boy in his arms, holding him close. “It’s alright baby, it’s alright” Liam cooed as he bounced his little one and paced around the room. 

Eventually Niall calmed down, “sorry”

“Nothing to be sorry for love” Liam assured, “Now do you want to come with me while I talk to the others or do you want to stay here and play?”

Niall thought about it for a really long time, “I don’t wanna talk with the others”

“Alright then love” Liam moved and gently sat Niall down in the playpen making sure that he had Stitch and turning on some music, “What would you like to play with?”

Niall just sat silently holding his stuffed friend to his chest and stared at Liam.

“How about some Legos hm? You always seem to like those” Liam placed a container of Legos into the playpen but Niall showed no interest. “Alright how about… some water colors?”

“Water what?” Niall asked his curiosity getting the better of him.

Liam smiled, at least that got some type of a reaction, “Water colors are paints”

Liam gathered the paints and paper before heading into the kitchen to fill a small container with water and grab a paper towel.  
“Finally” Zayn breathed when he saw Liam come into the kitchen.

“Yeah, sorry, I’ll be right back” Liam apologized as he gathered the desired items and then immediately left.  
“Well alright then” Louis said as he watched Liam race out of the room. 

Approximately ten minutes later Liam finally came back in and sat down in a chair. He didn’t particularly feel up for this conversation but knew that the others were concerned and he couldn’t blame them. “So, what do you want to know?”

“What happened out there? Why’d he run away?” Zayn asked.

“He ran off afraid that we would abandon him and decided to just leave us first instead” Liam explained, “He was so shocked that I actually came looking for him”

“I thought we were getting over that” Louis was confused.

Liam shook his head sadly, “I think we’ve only just started addressing that”

“What do you mean? What happened out there?” Zayn asked impatiently.

Liam looked up at the other three and they were stunned by the raw pain they saw on his face, “He told me”

“Told you what?” Louis asked hesitantly.

Liam gave a cold, dry laugh, “What happened to him, what his biological family did to him” he locked eyes with the other three then, “You want to know the worst part? I don’t think he even told me a third of all that happened”

The others didn’t know what to say, by the look Liam was giving them they knew it was bad they just didn’t know how bad.

“So…” Zayn tried to prod.

Liam shook his head, “Trust me when I say, you’re better off not knowing”

“How bad was it?” Harry asked.

Liam looked him straight in the eyes, “bad” was the only explanation he gave but it was enough to send the message through.

Harry ducked his head to avoid that penetrating, pained gaze. “So what now?”

That brought Liam out of his stupor, gave him something to do, “He needs to eat. I’ve gotten him to agree to some oatmeal however it took some bartering”

“What did he get out of it?” Louis smirked. He knew that Niall could be a clever little thing and was one hell of a barterer.

Liam matched Louis’ smirk, “Root beer and one of Harry’s chocolate cakes”

“Oh he gets a cake does he?” Harry asked.

“He really wanted one” Liam sheepishly defended.

Harry just rolled his eyes, “Yeah alright. Hey why doesn’t he help me make it? I bed he’d have fun”

“That sounds like a great idea” Liam agreed.

“Oh, oh, I wanna help, I wanna help” Louis cheered.

Everyone started laughing at Louis’ antics and the tension in the room started to dissipate a little.

“I’m going to get the baby,” Liam stated standing up, “Lou would you fix him some oatmeal?”

“Absolutely” Louis agreed happily. Niall really did need to eat more.

As Louis got the oatmeal ready Harry started gathering the ingredients for the cake. Zayn however was still trying to take in all that he’d been told, or what had been implied in the statements. How bad could Niall’s life have been to make Liam react that way? Was he in over his head? Could he really do this? Continue to be there for Niall? While the others happily prepared for their baking Zayn slipped out of the kitchen and back towards his room. He had to think some things out.

Liam came back to the kitchen five minutes later bouncing a shy baby on his hip and holding a painting in his hand. “How about we lay this out to dry hm?” Liam asked.

“OK” Niall agreed.

“Oatmeal’s up” Louis called placing the bowl on the table by the highchair, “Why don’t I get the baby set up while you get him his root beer?”

“Alright” Liam handed Niall over.

Niall frowned a little as he was taken from his mummy and placed in his highchair. He held stitch closer as he looked around the room. “Cake!” he cheered when he saw what Harry was doing”

Harry chuckled, “Soon enough but you have to help me make it first”

“Yes” Niall agreed instantly.

“But” Liam interjected, “You have to eat your oatmeal first”

“Root beer” was the first word out of Niall’s mouth.

“I know, I know” Liam nodded, “Now you can either have the whole thing now or you can have half a bottle now and half with your cake which would you like?”

“Half” Niall stated.

“Very well, half it is then” Liam agreed.

Niall ate the oatmeal easily enough which pleased Liam because he hadn’t eaten anything in so long. As soon as the oatmeal was done though the baking started. 

To put Louis, Harry and a baby Niall all together in a top of the line, fully stocked kitchen to make a cake and icing – both of which chocolate – and then to leave them there might not have been the best idea Liam’s ever had. Then again, the look of happiness on his baby’s face when the cakes were finally in the oven made everything worth it. Niall’s giggles were just dying down as he was carried upstairs for a much needed bath. Liam had left the two ‘adults’ to clean up the mess they’d made in the kitchen.

“Did you have a good time love?” Liam asked as he undressed his little one.

“Making the cake was fun” Niall admitted as he clung to his stitch.

“That’s wonderful” Liam said as he pried the stuffie out of Niall’s grasp.

Niall watched as stitch was moved to sit on the sink counter, “Would have been better if you’d stayed”

“Oh, I’m sorry love. Your uncles wanted to spend some time with you” Liam apologized, “They were just so excited”

Niall nodded in understanding as he was lowered into the tub. Instead of playing as he usually did Niall just sat there, staring at the wall while Liam bathed him.

“Don’t you want to play?” Liam asked.

Niall looked over to his mum and blinked. Liam was reminded of the first days, after they’d realized what they’d done back when Niall wouldn’t talk to them. He didn’t want to go back to that.

“What’s the matter love?”

“Why do you call me that?” Niall asked meekly.

“Because I love you” Liam smiled.

Niall shook his head, “How can you love me? I ruin everything”

And it was time for another round. Very well, if this is what Niall needed then Liam would happily tell the boy every thirty seconds if it helped. “You ruin nothing. You’re perfect and I love you so much more than anything else and always will”

“I’m not perfect. I can’t be”

“Why do you say that?” Liam questioned as he ran a hand through Niall’s hair.

“If I’m perfect as you say then they would have loved me. How bad must I have been for them not to love me?”

Liam closed his eyes for a second, “It had nothing to do with you baby. They were hateful and in pain and they wanted someone whom they could cause pain to in order to make themselves fell better. It had nothing to do with you love and I promise I won’t ever let them anywhere near you again”

Niall stared at Liam, searching, hoping. After a time he just nodded meekly and stared down at the water swirling it between his fingers.

Liam looked around the small room, searching for something that would brighten his boy’s spirits. Oh how he would love to get his hands on Niall’s biological family, it seems the only good thing they’d done was to bring Niall to them. Liam wasn’t sure what his life would be like right now without his baby boy.

Finally spotting something he thought that Niall would enjoy he pulled them out, “I have a new toy for you love”

Niall looked up curiously at that, “New toy?”

Liam smiled and pulled out the packet of bath crayons.

“Crayons? I’m in the tub”

“These are especially for the tub” Liam explained, “watch”

Liam took the green crayon and drew on the wall of the tub. Niall gasped in excitement and then grabbed the crayon from Liam’s hand and started drawing himself. He squealed in delight when he saw his stick figure actually appear.

In the end the bath crayons turned out to be a poor choice. The entire tub was covered in crayons as well as all the taps and faucets. The true mess came when Niall discovered that the crayons also worked on Liam and himself. When all was said and done Liam took Niall (and stitch – can’t forget stich) out of the nursery bathroom and into the one in his own room.

“Well little man, looks as though you need another bath” Liam said lightly as he turned the taps and warmed the water.

“We left the crayons” Niall pouted.

Liam chuckled, “Yeah, baby, we left the crayons”

“Need them”

“Oh, no” Liam shook his head as he placed Niall into the tub and started washing him – again.

“They’re fun” Niall whined.

“I’m sure they are however we don’t need them right now”

“When?”

Liam looked down at Niall, “Tell you what. When your Uncle Simon comes to visit next week he can give you your bath and you can play with those crayons then alright?”

“I can’t play with them for a whole week?” Niall asked stunned.

“It’ll be alright love, you have all sorts of new bath toys to explore” Liam appeased. Simon can have fun with the crayons next time – Liam had no intention of pulling them out again when he’s the one bathing Niall.

After Niall was clean and dressed Liam placed the boy in the small playpen in the corner of his room with stitch and a few blocks before going to take a shower himself, making sure to leave the bathroom door open lest his baby need him.

Two and a half hours after they went up Liam and Niall came wandering back down to the kitchen. “We’re finally clean” Liam smiled.

“Cake!” Niall exclaimed cutting his mum off.

Liam, Harry and Louis all burst out laughing at Niall’s excitement and appeased the excited boy with a small piece of cake and a half a bottle of root beer. It took a further three hours before Niall calmed down enough to watch a movie at which time he insisted that they watch Lilo and Stitch – naturally.

All four boys settled in for the movie on the same couch. Harry at the far right end, Louis in the middle and Liam on the far left with Niall in his lap along with stitch because you can’t leave stitch out of watching his own movie, what kind of monster would do that?

Liam had seen Lilo and Stitch before however he had never really paid much attention to it. As he watched it now though he started to understand why Niall loved this movie so much, why he felt so connected to the little blue stuffie that he won’t let out of his sight.

Stitch was a failed science experiment, much as Niall had been told he was all his life. Stitch had been abandoned and exiled, Niall had been kicked out and forced to live on the streets. Stitch had been taken in by a young girl; Niall had been taken in by his band mates. Stitch had been forced to hide who he really was, Niall had hidden his true intelligence and his past. Stitch had been unable to sleep peacefully because he had nothing to dream about, Niall suffered from nightmares. In the end Stitch had found a family who loved him, Niall was hoping for the same thing. Niall had found his family he just didn’t seem to believe it yet. 

As the movie came to a close Liam finally understood Niall’s appeal in the movie. His baby saw it as hope, as a chance. If an alien made to be evil with absolutely nothing in the galaxy could find a loving family, a home then it left the possibility open for Niall to have the same happy ending. Liam squeezed his baby tighter to him; Niall had found his home, his loving family. Liam just had to get the boy to realize it, to believe. He would though, if it took until his dying breath he would.


	37. Water

I have to say I'm surprised and pleased by how many people say they love this story. I honestly didn't think this would be all that interesting to others. Just wrote it for myself really. Thank you for your comments they are appreciated. I can't believe I've stayed up three hours writing this after doing eight hours of homework. Grad School sucks.  
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The following morning went by quickly up until Niall he and his stuffed friend was strapped into his high chair. Niall looked down at the plate of food put on his tray disinterestedly. 

“Five minutes” Louis chirped as he set down the bottle and tapped Niall lightly on the nose.  
Niall sent a slight glare up at Louis before huffing and pushing his plate away. He wasn’t hungry. Niall had learned long ago that becoming too reliant on food was a bad idea – never did know when he would go long lengths without anything to eat. If he let his body get used to eating then when he could no longer feed it he wound up with hunger pains. If his body wasn’t used to eating then when he couldn’t feed it he could ignore it.

Liam didn’t say anything to the boy as he waited out the five minutes. Now that Niall had eaten something Liam wasn’t about to allow the lad to go backwards. Even if it took an hour Niall would eat everything on his plate (which to Liam’s displeasure wasn’t all that much).   
The second the five minutes were up Liam shot a quick look over to Zayn, silently asking if he would like to take this or not. Zayn avoided Liam’s gaze like the plague. 

“Time’s up love” Liam said pushing the plate back in front of the baby.

Niall looked down at the plate and tried to push it back however Liam was holding it in place, “This isn’t an option. You have to eat”  
Niall turned his head to face his mummy, “I’m not hungry”

“You haven’t eaten since last night” Liam stated as he brought a forkful of eggs to his baby’s mouth “Hungry or not you’re eating now”  
Niall pushed Liam’s arm away from him with enough force to knock the fork out of his hand and then shoved the plate off of the tray and laid his head down on it.

Everyone was stunned. Niall had been doing everything he could to avoid getting into trouble for over a week now and yet in the past two days he’d run away and now this. What had gotten into the boy?

As much as Liam loathed the idea of punishing Niall, especially after all that had he’d heard yesterday, he couldn’t just let his baby get away with things. If he let Niall off the hook then the lad would only escalate. 

Liam took Niall out of the highchair and stood him in the only empty corner of the room, “fifteen minutes you turn around time restarts” and with that he turned and cleaned up the mess.

Niall stood there in shock. His mummy had put him in the corner. What would happen to him? Would one of them come up and punish him further? He hoped not. Niall clutched his blue friend closer to him as he stood there in fear. He couldn’t see behind him and knew that he wasn’t allowed to turn around lest the time restart. Niall had always been able to keep track of time, like an internal clock, it was useful and right now he knew that he’d been standing in that corner for five minutes, ten more to go.

The worst part of the corner was that Niall never knew when it would happen. The first few times he’d been given this punishment he’d been set on some steps where he could still see around him. Now though he couldn’t see anything and it was terrifying him. Every little sound, every scrape or jostle, cough or bite made him nervous. Any time one of them could get him; he wasn’t safe when he had no way of knowing what was coming.

Liam watched curiously as Niall stood in the corner; the boy looked as though he were shaking. Was he crying? Liam wasn’t sure. “Ni, love?” he asked as he stretched out his hand to touch the boy’s shoulder.

The instant something touched him Niall was curled up on the ground with his hands over his head and his knees to his chest with Stitch between his knees and his chest (he had promised to protect Stitch after all). It was his best defense position; it displayed his back to his attacker but protected his vital organs.

Zayn watched in terror as Niall laid in a ball on the ground shaking in fear. What had happened to this boy? What was he thinking when he’d agreed to do this? What were any of them thinking? This wasn’t good; this wasn’t helping. Niall was petrified right now; how was that helping? He couldn’t stand here and watch this. He had to get out of this room; out of this house. 

Harry, Louis and Liam didn’t pay Zayn any mind as he left the room; their focus was pointed solely on the small, scared little boy.

“Niall, love” Liam tried to sooth as he moved forward ever so slowly while motioning for the others to stay back knowing that Niall wouldn’t do well being crowded right now.

“Ni, can you look up at me please?” Liam asked softly.

Niall debated his options, should he do it? Was this a trap? He knew the voice, it was his mummy’s voice, Liam wouldn’t trick him like that would he? Liam had promised that he’d never abuse Niall, could Niall trust him? His mummy hadn’t lied to him yet.

Liam crouched near his baby patiently waiting the lad out. It was important to let Niall take the first step here, if Liam pushed he could loose Niall. Absolute relief flooded through him as he saw Niall’s head turn and met those baby blues. “Oh love, I never meant to scare you”

“Safe?” Niall whispered.

“Yes” Liam said immediately, “Yes, you are safe. I promise you, no one will ever abuse you ever again. I won’t allow it”

Within a second Liam found himself with an arm full of Niall. He wrapped his arms around his sobbing baby and held him close never wanting to let him go again. Funny how quickly things could change. Not even forty-eight hours ago Niall refused to be alone and now Liam was the one who didn’t want to let his little boy go.

“I’m so sorry love, I didn’t even think how you would feel” Liam felt like a jackass. How could he be stupid enough to leave Niall alone facing a corner? After everything that Niall had said yesterday Liam should have realized that Niall would be scared if he couldn’t see, didn’t know what dangers were lurking. He should have known. He would know from this point forward.

Thirty minutes later and Niall was finally calm and sitting on Liam’s lap at the table. Harry had brought another plate of food and put it in front of Niall. Louis tied a light blue bib around Niall’s neck and both sat back just watching.

“Open up love” Liam said softly as he gently pressed a plastic fork to Niall’s mouth hoping for this to work, for Niall to just open his mouth and eat something.

Niall was exhausted both physically and emotionally. He didn’t have the energy to fight it when Liam pressed the fork to his mouth just opened up to accept it. As he chewed he clutched his friend to him and leaned back into the warmth of his mummy’s chest knowing that he was safe here if nowhere else. Maybe having one place where he was safe wasn’t such a bad thing. 

Liam was able to get Niall to eat half the plate before his boy was just too tired to keep his eyes open. Sighing in defeat Liam stood up and moved to the nursery. Just as he was about to lay Niall down in his cot however Liam found that he just couldn’t. He couldn’t set his baby down, not right now. Instead Liam moved to the rocking chair and sat down with his little one in his lap rocking slowly.

 

Niall came to slowly. He wasn’t sure where he was but he was pressed against something soft but firm. He was warm and content. There was something strong holding him still, keeping him safe. As he moved his head slightly he caught the sound and feel of a heartbeat. He was lying on his mum. Smiling, Niall opened his eyes and looked up at his mum while bringing stitch closer – you can’t ever forget about stitch.

“Have a nice nap love?” Liam asked softly.

Niall brought a fist up to scrub at his eye, “guess”

“Well” Liam stood up with his baby in his arms, “Let’s get you changed and dressed then shall we? What is it that you’d like to do this afternoon?”

“Swimming” Niall, cheered instantly. He’d been begging to go swimming ever since they’d gotten here and he had a feeling that Liam might just let him today.

It took all of ten minutes before Niall and Liam were heading down the stairs towards the others. Both decked out in swim trunks (and a swim nappy on Niall of course) and towels.

“So who wants to go swimming?” Liam asked cheerily as he entered the living room where Harry and Louis were crashed on a couch.

“Oh I love swimming” Louis exclaimed excitedly.

“I’m up for it” Harry agreed.

“Alright get your trunks” Liam instructed.

Niall squirmed, “No. Swim now”

“We’ll wait here” Liam told the other two while shushing the little one in his arms.

Niall pouted as he watched the others leave to get changed. Once they were gone he poked Liam in the chest, “Swimming Mummy”

Liam rolled his eyes and turned to face his boy, “You need to wait for the others it’s only polite”

Niall grumbled as he crossed his arms over his stuffed friend. He didn’t like Liam’s ruling but there was nothing he could do about it unless he wanted to get in trouble again and he didn’t want that.

Liam looked at his baby and couldn’t help but think how cute he looked but it also brought to mind something he was dreading, “Love can I see Stitch while we swim?”

Niall’s eyes went wide and he brought his friend closer to him, “He’ll be fine”

OK, Liam knew that intellectually Niall was perfectly capable of understanding that a stuffed toy would not do well in a pool however that did not seem to be true at the moment. It was times like these that Liam had to wonder if Niall wasn’t slipping into a headspace of sorts. Liam had wondered this before but Niall always remembered exactly what had happened, had always been just as intelligent it was just filled with more… innocence, trust? Liam wasn’t sure.

“Stitch won’t do well in the water love. Don’t you remember the movie? Stitch is afraid of water” Liam pulled that out of thin air but it was true, Stitch didn’t like water.

Niall contemplated this for a moment before seeing the sense in his mummy’s words. “He can watch though?”

Liam smiled and brought Niall into the indoor pool, “He can watch” Liam pried Stitch from Niall’s hands and placed the toy on a reclining chair along with the towels.

“Whose ready to play?” Louis cheered as he and Harry came barreling into the pool and straight towards the baby in Liam’s arm.  
“ME!” Niall yelled happily.

Liam handed Niall over to the two overenthusiastic uncles’ simply enough and couldn’t help but be a little concerned as he watched them jump straight into the deep end with Niall in tow. “Be careful,” he scolded.

Niall was the first one to pop up, “Relax mummy. I’m a great swimmer.

Liam had to bite his tongue to stop himself from telling Niall to get to the shallow end. He knew it was true – that Niall was an amazing swimmer the best of all of them – it was just hard to remember that when he applied it to his baby boy. Shaking his head Liam joined in the fun.

The boys spent hours in the pool splashing each other fighting each other. Any game that Niall wanted to play they did. Naturally Niall won every race, every diving contest, every breath holding contest. Niall was the most skilled out of all of them when it came to swimming.

 

After three hours Liam called it a day. He was exhausted and so were the other boys, though Niall would never admit it. 

“No” Niall whined as Louis carried him out of the pool.

“Yes” Louis whined back.

That elicited a small smile from the lad who was handed off to Liam so that he could have a bath.

“Bath time I think” Liam stated as he carried Niall up to the nursery bathroom (which Harry and Louis had so thankfully cleaned from Niall’s little crayon experiment the last time) and filled the tub with water and bubbles.

“More water” Niall cheered as he was stripped and lowered down.

Liam rolled his eyes, “More water”

Once Niall was bathed – and had taken a decent amount of time to play because that was just of the utmost importance – Liam dressed him in some shorts and a t-shirt before placing the lad and stitch into the small playpen in his room so that he could take a shower.  
Eventually everyone was clean and crashed out on the big couch in the living room. 

“So who wants to watch a movie?” Harry asked.

“Lilo and Stitch” Niall stated.

Louis groaned, not two nights in a row, “I’ve got a better idea”

“What could be better than Stitch?” Niall asked annoyed. I mean really he couldn’t think of a single movie that would be better than stitch. It just wasn’t possible.

“Lilo and Stitch 2” Louis said simply as Harry slipped out of the room.

“There’s another one?!” Niall asked excitedly.

“There sure is love” Liam smiled.

“Stitch 2, Stitch 2, Stitch 2” Niall chanted as he started bouncing on his mummy’s knee.

“Stitch 2 it is” Louis stated.

Harry came back into the living room holding a tray full of popcorn and drinks. He passed out a bowl of popcorn to everyone and then for himself and Louis he had a couple of beers, for Liam he had some water (because in Harry’s opinion Liam hadn’t had enough water today despite the fact that he’d downed practically a gallon in the pool), which earned him a slight glare, and for Niall a bottle of strawberry-kiwi juice.

Liam sat there and happily munched his popcorn as he watched his baby boy. Despite the terrible start to the day Niall was happily sitting engrossed in the movie with his furry friend in his arms. Smirking slightly Liam started to feed his popcorn to his little one knowing that Niall would make no move to do so as he was too busy watching the new movie. 

Liam’s only concern at the moment was that the new psychiatrist was supposed to come later that day.


	38. Why Mummy?

There was a knock at the door at about the end of the movie. Liam made to shift Niall over and stand up to answer however the baby had other ideas. Every time Liam tried to move Niall over to Louis’ lap the boy would cling to him, the funny thing was that Niall wasn’t even paying attention to what he was doing – just reacting.  
After his third failed attempt Liam just sighed and turned to Harry, “You mind getting the door?”  
“Not at all” Harry popped up and made his way to the front door, he was curious about what this therapist looked like. He never got to meet the last one and he wanted to be a bigger part of this whole thing. “Hi, I’m Harry” he greeted.  
“Dr. Fredericks” the Dr. greeted.  
The two walked into the living room where they found Niall still sitting on Liam, clinging to Stitch, dummy firmly planted in his mouth and eyes and attention glued to the movie.  
“We need to get started” Dr. Fredericks informed Liam.  
“The movie only has a few minutes left” was Liam’s response.  
“It doesn’t matter, it’s time to get started” the Dr. reiterated.  
Liam glared at the man, “The movie will be over in a few minutes, we will start when it’s finished”  
“My time is valuable and I don’t wish to waste it…”  
“We are the ones paying for the time therefore we will be finishing the movie first” Louis butted in ending the conversation.  
The Dr. glared at Louis, “I will not be waiting” he started to make his way towards Niall in order to take the lad back to the music room.  
Liam glared at the man and tightened his grip around Niall’s waist while Louis and Harry got in between the Dr. and Niall.  
“This movie will be over in less than five minutes and then the three of us can get started” Liam stated.  
The Dr. balked at that, “It will just be Mr. Horan and I. We discussed this last time”  
“And after you left I talked to Simon and have permission to be present during all sessions” Liam informed the irate doctor.  
“That is not the agreement. If you are in the room I will not receive the same results” The Dr. fumed.  
“Too bad. I’m going to be there” Liam stated.  
“You can either accept the fact that things will not be your way or you may leave but nothing will change” Louis said.  
“Do you know who I am?” The Dr. asked icily.  
“No and we don’t care” Harry growled.  
The Dr. looked as though he were about to actually blow steam out of his ears before he turned on his heel and stormed out of the door. All three adults stared at each other for a second before simultaneously sighed in relief.  
“So what do we do now?” Louis asked.  
“We could go for a walk” Harry suggested, “You know, see the property”  
“Sounds like fun” Liam agreed.  
“More Stitch” Niall butted in looking at Louis and pointing at the screen where the credits were currently coming to an end.  
“No more Stitch right now” Louis informed the boy only to receive a massive pout.  
“Stitch” Niall repeated a bit more firmly.  
“Walk” Harry stated lifting Niall out of Liam’s hold and spinning the boy around.  
Niall was soon giggling as Liam reclaimed his baby and carried the lad upstairs for a quick nappy change. “Hey Harry can you get the stroller out for Ni please?” he called on his way up.  
“Stroller?” Niall asked.  
“Yes, stroller” Liam replied as he laid Niall down on the changing table. Niall still wasn’t eating a whole lot and he was grossly underweight, Liam wasn’t about to let the lad go walking around the property for who knows how long.  
“No stroller” Niall stated as he clutched his Stitch to his chest.  
“You’re either going in a stroller or not going at all” Liam informed the lad and then popped the dummy back into his mouth before the boy could say anymore. As he finished cleaning his baby up Liam paused to decide what kind of nappy he wanted to use. Knowing his little one the boy would take any chance he could to get out of that stroller and Liam would probably let him out at some point or another. That was fine however Liam still had a small part of him that was concerned that Niall would run off if he was let out. With that fear on the forefront of his mind Liam pulled out the thickest nappies there were and slipped one under his baby.  
Niall laid on the changing table pouting. First he wasn’t allowed to watch Stitch again then he was going to have to sit in a stupid stroller when everyone else was going to be walking. It was unfair. Why couldn’t he do what he wanted?  
Finally Liam was snapping the onesie shut at the crotch before slipping on a pair of short overalls and then some socks and shoes. Niall whined at the shoes and tried to kick them off. Why did he need shoes if he was being made to stay in a stroller?  
“Ni, you have to wear shoes when we leave the house” Liam informed the squirming lad.  
“No” Niall said.  
Liam sighed and just took hold of the boy one foot at a time as he slipped the shoes on the struggling boy. Once he had finally completed the task he sighed in relief before setting his little one down as he cleaned up.  
As soon as Niall was on his feet he could tell that there was something off. His legs were farther apart than usual and he was having difficulty standing. Niall tried to bring his legs closer together but the only thing he succeeded in doing was falling on his backside.  
The instant Niall fell Liam whipped around, “Oh baby!” Liam exclaimed as he scooped his boy up, “Are you alright?”  
“No” Niall stated.  
“What’s wrong? What did you hurt?” Liam started fretting.  
“Can’t walk” Niall pouted.  
Liam took a breath in relief, “It’s OK love. Your nappies just a bit bigger than you’re used to”  
“Why?”  
“Just incase” was all Liam said. He decided that it just might be best to carry his little boy for now.  
“No” Niall said. He didn’t like this; he didn’t want this new nappy.  
Liam just hummed at the boy as he carried him outside to where Harry and Louis were waiting with the stroller and wouldn’t you know it, the stroller was Stitch themed.  
“No” Niall stated as he was carried over to it.  
“No what baby?” Harry asked.  
“No” Niall repeated as he was being lowered into the stroller.  
“You don’t want in the stroller?” Louis asked coming over to help Liam out.  
“No” Niall said as he lost the fight and was strapped into the stroller and the hood was brought up.  
“So which way should we start?” Louis asked as he took hold of the stroller and started walking.  
“How about the…” Harry started but dropped off as he noted Zayn walking up to them from behind.  
Liam silently gestured for Louis and Harry to take Niall off to a path to the right while he went to intercept Zayn.  
Liam held Zayn off until he was sure that Niall was out of earshot before laying into the man. “Where the hell have you been?”  
“I just needed some time…” Zayn started.  
“Some time! You needed some time?” Liam said incredulously, “Niall was scared, panicking and insecure and you left! You left Niall at a time when he needed you most because you needed some time? What about Niall!”  
“I was scared!” Zayn yelled, “You’d just said that Niall’s past was…. You said it was so bad that you couldn’t even say! Then Niall was back to being silent and unresponsive and then he was crying and curled up into a ball on the ground” there were tears streaming down Zayn’s face and he was shaking.  
Liam took a breath and deflated, slumping down onto a deck chair. Zayn took the hint and sat in the chair to Liam’s left.  
“So… What’s your plan now?” Liam asked.  
“What do you mean?”  
“I mean, are you backing out or are you going in full force?” Liam hated to ask, hated to make Zayn choose when the man was clearly having such a hard time. But it didn’t matter what Zayn wanted, or what he wanted, this was for Niall and Niall would always come first.  
“I…” Zayn hesitated, “I don’t know”  
“Well you need to make up your mind” Liam stated.  
“I know and I want to. I want to be there for him more than anything but I’m so scared. What if I screw up? What if I make this worse? He’s so screwed up already I…”  
“He’s not screwed up” Liam growled, “He’s had a hard life and he has a lot of scars but he’s perfect. He has never been nor will ever be screwed up”  
Zayn was confused, “After everything he’s been through…”  
“Everything he’s been through has been horrible but Niall is my perfect baby boy” Liam stated.  
Zayn nodded, “He is perfect”  
“You need to make up your mind and do it quickly. By the time we get back from out walk I want a decision” Liam said before standing up and heading after Harry, Louis and Niall leaving Zayn alone with his thoughts.  
It didn’t take long for Liam to catch up with the others and he couldn’t help but smile as he came upon them. Louis was standing off to the side holding Niall’s stitch. Harry was next to Niall, making sure that he didn’t fall. Niall was crouched down poking at something on the ground and smiling. Liam had no idea what his baby was so fascinated by but at least he was happy.  
“What’s so interesting love?” Liam asked as he crouched down by Niall.  
“Look Mummy” Niall said excitedly as he pointed to a little lizard that was sitting on a rock.  
“Oh, isn’t that pretty” Liam agreed.  
Niall reached out and poked the lizard on the back gently before yanking his finger away and giggling. Liam just let his little one play.  
They stayed outside for a good two and a half hours, up until it would be getting too dark to see soon. Niall was having a blast, every time he saw something interesting he would shout for them to stop and let him out so he could see. Liam was amazed at the boy’s curiosity, he wanted to see everything and if he knew what it was he would tell the others every single fact he’d ever known. Liam now knew about most every insect and crawling animal that they’d come across, so much more than he’d ever wanted to know. Niall’s mind was amazing and quick as a whip. It was incredible.  
“I think it’s time to head back” Liam said gently as he reached down and picked up his little boy off the ground where he’d been digging in the ground.  
“No” Niall said annoyed.  
“Sorry love but it’s getting late” Liam said as he gently patted Niall’s padded backside and rubbed his back.  
“No” Niall whined as he rubbed his face against Liam’s shoulder and then rubbed his eyes with his fist.  
Liam smiled down at his little one, he was adorable but still, Liam couldn’t wait until Niall got out of this ‘only say no’ phase. Ironically, as much as Niall hated this current phase it was a wonderful sign, Niall was starting to let go and be babied.  
Liam carried Niall over to the stroller and laid the backing out before setting his little one in. It wasn’t a perfect bed but it was better than sitting up.  
“No” Niall whined again at the loss of warmth.  
“Shh, shh” Liam soothed as he gathered the stitch blanket, dummy and… where was the stuffie? “Love, where’s your stitch?”  
“Papa has it” Niall mumbled sleepily as he rubbed his fist into his eyes again.  
Liam paused, Papa? “And where is Papa love?”  
“Next to Baba” Niall whined, “want stitch Mummy”  
“OK love, I’ll get him for you” Liam assured.  
Liam looked up over the stroller at Louis and Harry, or more accurately Papa and Baba though he wasn’t quite sure which was which yet. Shouldn’t be too hard to figure out though seeing as Papa had stitch.  
“So whose Papa?” Liam asked striding over to the two other adults.  
“What?” Harry and Louis asked simultaneously.  
“Well I’ve been informed that Papa has stitch and he was standing next to Baba. So whose who?”  
Both Louis and Harry looked down at their hands simultaneously as though they didn’t know if they were holding a stuffed toy.  
“I’m Papa!” Louis cheered as he rushed over to the baby handing down Stitch.  
“That means I’m Baba!” Harry jumped excitedly as he took the blanket from Liam and moved over to Niall as well.  
Liam smiled and shook his head as he too joined the others around Niall’s stroller. He snuck his arm in between the two cooing adults and popped the dummy into his little ones mouth. “We ready to head back?” he asked softly.  
“Absolutely. You ready Papa?” Harry asked smiling.  
“I am if you are Baba” Louis agreed, “Hey question though”  
“Yeah?” Liam asked.  
“There’s three fathers and yet you’re Mummy” Louis said.  
“Safe” Niall mumbled.  
“What?” Harry asked.  
“Mummy’s are safe” Niall spoke up a little more though he still had his eyes closed.  
Liam beamed. He was safe! Niall thought that he was safe! Niall trusted him! “Well you heard him boys. I am safe” he stated smugly as he took ahold of the stroller handle and headed back towards the house.  
It was getting late and Niall needed to have a bath and some type of supper as well as a bottle before he could be tucked into his cot for the night. Liam didn’t even remember Zayn until he saw the man standing on the front porch as they came up thirty minutes later. Zayn looked nervous and Liam hoped that the man had finally made a decision.

__________________________________________________________________________________

So what should Zayn say? Should he stick around but become an Uncle? Should he stay Daddy? Should he just back out a bit and just be another body in the house? Opinions please.


	39. Well?

Liam gestured for Harry and Louis to take Niall inside while he headed straight over to Zayn. He had given the man an ultimatum and was curious as to the answer he would receive.  
“Well?”  
Zayn looked up hesitantly, he’d been thinking this through for days now – ever since Niall had run off and hadn’t come up with an answer. He didn’t like being put on the spot like this, didn’t like that Liam had given him a time limit. Still he kind of understood.  
“I love him” Zayn answered.  
Liam sighed, that wasn’t really an answer, “I don’t doubt that you love him”  
Zayn nodded. He loved Niall to death, “I only want what’s best for him”  
“I know that. That’s all I want as well”  
“So then I have a question”  
“Alright”  
Zayn looked up to meet Liam’s eyes, “Are we doing what’s best for him? Is this what’s best for him?”  
Liam looked up at Zayn in utter shock. “Of course this is what’s best for him! How can you even ask that?”  
“Have you seen him?” Zayn exclaimed, “He’s a mess. He’s constantly petrified, get’s upset about every little thing, he has no concept of family or love or even trust. He’s broken”  
“No!” Liam argued, “He is not broken! Don’t you ever say that!”  
“But he is Liam,” Zayn spat back, “and you need to accept that”  
“NO!”  
“Why?” Zayn asked, “Why won’t you admit it?”  
“Because he is NOT broken” Liam shouted at him.  
“What is he then?!”  
“ALIVE!”  
Both men froze.  
“He’s not broken Zayn. He’s alive, he survived and they didn’t break him. The one thing they couldn’t do was break him,” Liam said quietly.  
Zayn stood there taking in what Liam said, “You’re right they didn’t break him but he is in pieces” he held up his hand to stave off the interruptions he could see coming, “but we can put him back together, we can heal him”  
Liam looked up at Zayn, “We are working on healing him. It’s just gonna take time”  
“I understand that but is this the best way?”  
“Yes”  
“How can you say that with such force? Such certainty?” Zayn asked baffled.  
“Because I’ve been watching him,” Liam answered, “spending time with him. He’s doing so much better Zayn. You should have seen him earlier, out there, having fun. He was smiling and laughing, curious, exploring, safe, happy, and he was basking in the attention. Zayn, this is working it’s just going to take time… a lot of time”  
“He was happy?” Zayn asked somewhat surprised. All he’d seen of Niall lately was a sad, scared little boy and it was killing Zayn. He couldn’t bear to see his baby so destroyed.  
“Yeah” Liam smiled, “He was loving it, didn’t want to come in but he was too tired to stay awake”  
Zayn smiled at that, “I would have loved to have been there”  
“You could have been you know” Liam told him.  
“Yeah” Zayn shook his head, he’d been an idiot.  
Liam paused, took a breath and then looked Zayn square in the eye, “What’s your decision?”  
“He’s my baby” Zayn said, “and I’m his Daddy”  
Liam smiled, that was the answer he’d been hoping for. “Well then, how about we get in there to him”  
“That sounds wonderful” Zayn agreed.  
Both men made their way into the house. It was unknown to them how long they’d been outside talking or where Harry, Louis and Niall were. They decided to start in the kitchen and then make their way from there.  
Before they actually made it to the kitchen however they heard voices in the living room. Deciding to follow the noise they soon found Niall sitting between Harry and Louis all facing the television.  
“What’s going on?” Liam asked coming into the room. He had specifically told Louis and Harry that they needed to get Niall home, fed and put down for the night. Nowhere in there had he mentioned lounging on the couch watching a show.  
“Well Niall here would only agree to eat if we agreed to let him watch a show after” Harry explained.  
“That’s not how this works,” Zayn said, “and Niall knows that”  
Niall ignored Zayn, he saw no reason to seeing as Zayn had seen no reason to be around lately. One thing he couldn’t ignore though was Zayn trying to pick him up. Trying being the key word because Niall was not making it easy.  
Zayn was desperately trying to keep ahold of his little one but the boy wasn’t allowing it. He was thrashing around every which way to get out of Zayn’s hold. “Baby I need you to hold still. I don’t want to drop you”  
“No” Niall said while still trying to watch his show.  
Liam came over and took Niall out of Zayn’s struggling grasp and naturally the boy stopped squirming though he still didn’t want to be held.  
Zayn was hurt. He didn’t like that Niall had thrashed around in his hold and not Liam’s. Still, it was his fault. He had left Niall alone for days now and the boy obviously noticed even if he never said anything. This was Zayn’s doing and he was the one who had to live with the consequences.  
“Time for bed love” Liam stated as he started walking out of the room.  
“NO!” Niall complained as he jerked his head every which way in order to watch his show.  
“Love, now is not the time for television” Liam said turning to switch the show off. He paused in irritation however when he saw what it was that Harry and Louis had let Niall watch. “Are you two serious?” he asked incredulously.  
“What?” Louis asked innocently. What was wrong with the show?  
Liam shook his head, “I’ll be back in a minute” he informed the boys as he took his baby up to the nursery.  
“No” Niall whined as he was taken out of the living room and laid on the changing table, clutching his stitch.  
“Love, you have to get to sleep. We have a busy day tomorrow” Liam said while wrestling the boy into his blanket.  
“I don’t want that” Niall complained as Liam tried to swaddle him.  
“Please stay still love” Liam begged. He had noted that Niall slept better when he was swaddled. Up till this point every time he’d done it Niall had been asleep first. An awake baby was harder to swaddle.  
Eventually Liam won out and lifted a swaddled Niall into his arms, “Time to sleep love” he said softly as he rocked the little one side to side. Soon enough Niall was out cold with a pacifier bobbing in his mouth.  
After settling his little one in the cot Liam made his way back downstairs. “What the hell were you thinking letting Niall watch that?”  
“What’s wrong with Dr. Who?” Harry questioned, “It’s a family show”  
Liam rolled his eyes, “Yes it’s a family show however it’s not meant for an infant! It’s a bit scary for a baby don’t you think?”  
Harry and Louis looked over at each other, “Niall’s the one who picked it out”  
“What was this episode about exactly?” Zayn asked.  
“Um…” Louis thought, “The Dr. and Donna went to the Library where they had to avoid the shadows to keep from being eaten alive”  
“So your goal is to make Niall terrified of the dark?” Zayn asked incredulous.  
Harry and Louis looked to each other, “We hadn’t thought of that” they said meekly.  
Liam sighed, “Well it’s something you’re going to have to pay more attention to now. Uncles are allowed to be fun and give in but Papas and Babas aren’t. They need to do what’s best for their baby”  
“Yes…” Zayn started, “Wait, what?” Who the hell was papa and baba?  
“I’m Papa!” Louis informed happily.  
“I’m Baba!” Harry said smiling.  
Zayn turned to Liam, “When did this happen?”  
“During the walk. Niall was so out of it he just called them Papa and Baba” Liam shrugged.  
“So they’re dads as well” Zayn said, “Then why are you Mum?”  
“Because I’m safe” Liam smiled.  
“So did we tell you that Niall speaks French?” Louis asked smugly.  
“No” Liam and Zayn said at once.  
“When did you find this out?” Zayn asked hesitantly.  
“Well Harry and I were talking about our upcoming leg of the tour and how after America we were heading to France” Louis started.  
“Right but how does this lead to learning Niall speaks French?” Liam asked. Niall is not one to just give information like that away. It had taken the boys nearly seven months to learn that the kid even spoke Spanish and that was only because he was speaking to another Spanish speaker off to the side and Louis had overheard.  
“See, Louis was joking around about my finding a nice French girl and I said something about not being able to do so because I didn’t know any French lines and Niall just spat out a few” Harry said.  
“Well we think they were pick-up lines. We’re not a hundred percent on that one” Louis elaborated.  
“So he speaks French” Liam couldn’t help but huff out a small chuckle, “Why doesn’t that surprise me?”  
“I’m not sure I could be surprised by anything Niall knows at this point” Zayn admitted. Everyone shook their heads in agreement to that.  
They all talked for another few hours, mostly just filling Zayn in on what had been going on with Niall and how the shrink threw a hissy fit earlier that afternoon and stormed out because he wasn’t willing to wait for five minutes.

When Niall was four his Uncle had forced him to dig a seven foot deep hole in the ground in his back yard. It had taken Niall two weeks to complete the task. He probably could have gotten it done a lot quicker had he not been starved, beaten and tortured by his uncle during this time as well.  
Once the hole was finished Niall had been hung upside down by his ankles while his Uncle set a door in place above the hole. After seven hours of hanging upside down Niall’s ankles were bleeding from where the rope had dug itself in and he was finally taken down. Only catch – he was locked in the hole with two bottles or water one empty and one full. The hole was pitch black, no light whatsoever. Niall could hear animals and people and who knows what else above him. There were insects slithering around in the hole with him. The poor four-year-old boy was petrified.  
Four days later and Niall was practically blinded by a sudden burst of light coming from above him. He was lifted out of the hole and sent back to his mother. That was the last time he’d ever spoken a different language in front of another person unless they already spoke that language.

Niall woke up screaming. He opened his eyes to see that his room was dark. It was too dark! Terrified Niall clutched his stitch to his chest thankful that Liam had wrapped stitch into the blanket with him. He looked up at where the mobile should be, where his night-light should be only it was black.  
“Baby?” Zayn asked coming into the room and flipping on the light.  
Niall shut his eyes for a moment getting used to the light before opening them back up.  
“Love, what’s wrong?” Liam asked opening the blanket up and holding his little one close.  
Niall cried into his Mummy’s chest.  
“What happened baby, what was your nightmare about?” Zayn asked rubbing Niall’s back as Liam rocked him.  
“T… to… too da… dark” Niall stuttered.  
Liam looked over to the mobile above the cot; he could have sworn that Niall had a nightlight there. When he didn’t see anything he gestured for Zayn to go figure it out seeing as he currently had his arms full of little boy.  
Zayn walked over to the mobile to see what was wrong, “The bulbs burnt out” he informed Liam.  
“Oh baby” Liam sighed. Of course the night that Louis and Harry allow Niall to watch a show about flesh eating monsters that live in the dark would be the very night that the nightlight goes out.  
“What do you say we all crash in my bed for the rest of the night?” Zayn offered. He knew that Niall wouldn’t allow himself to be removed by Zayn, Niall didn’t trust him very much right now. Still he wanted to be close to his little one when he was this scared.  
“That sounds nice doesn’t it love?” Liam asked.  
Niall just nodded in assent, he didn’t want to be alone right now, “lights?” he asked meekly.  
“Of course, I’ll leave all the bedroom lights on” Zayn assured.  
A quick nappy change later and the three were curled up in Zayn’s bed fast asleep.


	40. The Families

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alright so here is a new update. Honestly I wasn't going to update until after I came back from vacation seeing as how I'm swamped but Est1992 seeing as how after pestering them to update they did so - twice. So here is a new chapter just for Est1992 as a thank you.
> 
> Now I have a vacation coming in a little over a week where I will be on a ten day cruise - in the middle of the ocean - no internet. Before this I have six quizzes two papers and a group project I must complete so there won't be another update for a while unless I get extremely lucky with time. However this chapter is almost 4500 words so hopefully that helps.

As Niall started to stir the next morning the first thing he noticed is that he couldn’t move. He sighed as he realized that his Mummy must have swaddled him again; he really didn’t like that. The next thing he noticed was that his Mummy wasn’t in the room – Zayn was.  
“Good morning baby” Zayn greeted cheerily. He was hoping that Niall would respond better to him this morning than he had last night but knew it was a long shot.  
“Mummy?” Niall asked spitting out his dummy.  
Zayn sighed, “Mummy’s downstairs getting everything ready for when all of your grandparents get here”  
The boys had all informed Niall about the families coming, well the parents anyway. Niall had freaked until they promised him that his biological family wouldn’t be coming, that they didn’t even know where the house was. After that scare Niall hadn’t really cared about who else was coming, now that it was closer though he was realizing he should have been a bit more reluctant.  
Niall didn’t really care that the other boys were going to get to see their families, what did bother him was what he was going to be doing during that time. The others would have their hands full with their real families and Niall knew he wasn’t apart of that – never would be – and that was fine; he understood. Didn’t mean it didn’t hurt though.  
Niall sighed as he started to struggle in his bindings. Zayn took pity on the boy and loosened the blanket. Liam had originally just laid the little one down on the bed between he and Zayn however Niall started to stir and whine in his sleep which was soon followed by soft pleadings. It had taken Liam and Zayn almost half an hour to calm the lad down and Niall was still fidgety until Liam had swaddled him. After that the boy slept peacefully for the rest of the night.  
As soon as Niall was free of his bindings he started to get out of the bed. He needed to find someplace to be whilst the families were here. First though; he should probably find his Mummy for a quick change – maybe Mummy would still change him every once in a while the others were here; that would be nice.  
Zayn watched Niall climb out of bed and head towards the door with Stitch under one arm (really that boy was obsessed with his stuffie). “Where are you going baby?” he asked curiously.  
Niall turned to face Zayn, “Mummy”  
“What do you need Mummy for?”   
Niall looked down as he shifted from foot to foot. His nappy was becoming uncomfortable.  
Zayn watched Niall squirm and realized what might be the problem, “Do you need a change?”  
Niall glared at Zayn; why did he care? Zayn hadn’t cared since they arrived at the house, “Want Mummy”  
Zayn held in his sigh. Niall was upset with him, that much was certain but he had to show the boy that he did care and he was here for the long haul. “Well let’s get you changed and take you to Mummy then”  
Niall backed away as Zayn made to pick him up. Why couldn’t the guy just take a hint? Niall sure could. He understood exactly what it was that Zayn had said.  
Zayn was surprised by Niall’s sudden withdraw but decided to try again. Niall was still his baby after all and he still needed his nappy changed.  
Niall watched as Zayn came towards him again and did the only thing he could think of – run. The second he had the door open he barreled out into the hallway however he didn’t get far before he ran into Louis.  
“Whoa there” Louis chuckled as he caught Niall, “Where’s the fire?”  
Niall turned to look at who had him and felt a surge of relief when he saw his Papa. Instead of answering he just turned and buried himself into his Papa’s chest knowing that the man would take care of things from here.  
Louis just shook his head in amusement at the boy’s antics as he grasped Niall under the arms and put the lad on his hip. As Louis placed his hand on Niall’s bum he noted that his nappy was soaked, “How about we get you changed hm?”  
“I was just trying to do that actually” Zayn said finally spotting his little boy.  
“Ah well then…” Louis said as he started to hand Niall over.  
Niall felt Papa start to move him and gripped tighter to the man’s back. He didn’t want to go to Zayn; didn’t want to burden the man.  
Louis felt Niall cling to him, “Alright, alright” he soothed. Shooting an apologetic look to Zayn Louis then took Niall into the nursery and laid the lad out on the changing table. He changed Niall quickly before removing the lad from his sleeper, “So what should we wear today?” Louis asked holding up two outfit options one was a sailor suit – Niall pulled a face at that one – and the other was a pair of shorts and a stitch t-shirt.  
“Stitch!” Niall exclaimed, always willing to wear anything stitch related so long as it wasn’t baby clothes. One thing Niall had yet to come around to was the baby clothes. He wasn’t a fan of the sleepers or the onesies and yet he was still made to wear them.  
As Niall lay there allowing himself to be changed he started to look around the nursery. In truth he hadn’t spent a lot of time in here unless he had been sleeping. Now that he took a proper look at it he saw that there were quite a few things for him to do. The room was filled with toys and art supplies. Maybe he could just spend the week up here? He would be entertained and he could curl up on the couch to sleep – that would be so much more comfortable than the floor. Yes here would be good.  
It wasn’t much longer before Louis was carrying Niall and stitch down to the kitchen where Liam and Harry already had breakfast on the table.  
“Mummy!” Niall called upon finally seeing the man he had been asking for all morning.  
“Niall!” Liam said just as excitedly as he took his baby boy into his arms. Zayn had filled him in on what happened this morning and while Liam felt bad for Zayn he also understood where Niall was coming from.  
“Breakfast” Harry stated as he carried plates to the table.  
Liam moved to place Niall in his highchair but the lad let out a whine and clung to him. A second attempt gave the same result, “Love, you need to sit in your chair” Liam informed the stubborn lad.  
“No” Niall said as he clung harder.  
“Niall, you need to sit in your chair” Liam said a bit more forcefully as he gestured for Louis to assist him in getting the lad strapped in.  
“No” Niall repeated however it was in vein. Despite his struggles Niall soon found himself locked into his high chair and a plate of food placed in front of him.  
All the boys left Niall to his pouting. Once the five-minute mark was up Liam just sighed and brought a forkful of food up to Niall’s mouth. The little one had missed too many meals already; Liam wasn’t about to let him miss any more.  
Niall felt the fork press against his lips and turned his head away, “No”  
“This isn’t an option love” Liam informed the boy.  
“No” Niall repeated as he continued to squirm away.  
“Niall stop this” Liam said sternly.  
Niall froze and turned his head back to face his Mummy. He studied Liam’s face, the man wasn’t happy but he wasn’t angry either more just… irritated? Frustrated? Determined. Mummy was determined. Niall sighed; his Mummy was never one to mess with when he was determined.  
Eventually Liam managed to get a half of the plate into Niall. It wasn’t as much as he would like but it was something.  
“We need to get ready. Our families will be here soon” Harry said as he finished cleaning up the kitchen.  
“Agreed” Liam said as he let Niall out of the high chair.  
Once Niall was free he took that as his sign to leave. Quietly Niall made his way back up the stairs and to the nursery before clicking the door closed. He knew that the boys were excited about seeing their families and had no desire to be in the way. Niall knew that the other boys wouldn’t want him around, getting involved in their time with their families and he didn’t blame them – if he had families as nice as theirs then he’d probably not want to be disturbed either. Especially not with someone like himself.  
Looking around the nursery Niall decided to take a seat at the table surrounded by art supplies. He was amazed at what he saw. There were so many things that he could work with; clay, pastels, pencils, pens, watercolors and so much more. Starting with clay Niall pulled a clump forth and got to work.  
As he sculpted Niall thought about Zayn and couldn’t help but wonder what had changed. Niall had believed Zayn when he’d promised that he’d never leave, that Niall wasn’t a burden and he wanted this. Niall understood now that it was a lie.   
At first things had been going great – Zayn had been everything Niall had ever imagined in a Daddy so that’s what he’d called the man and Zayn had seemed pleased by the name. Niall had been skeptical at first but when Zayn continued to be there he’d let it alone, become complacent, trusting – that had been a mistake.  
Ever since they arrived Zayn had been distant, constantly removing himself from whatever room Niall was in not five minutes after the boy entering. It didn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out that Zayn no longer wanted to be burdened with Niall. Now no despite what everyone seemed to think Niall wasn’t mad at Zayn, he understood, had been expecting it, he was just… disappointed? Once Zayn started to pull away Niall hadn’t said anything, hadn’t even mentioned the man not wanting to bring up yet another person in his long list of failures. Everything had been going fine too. Niall still had his Mummy and he even had a Papa and a Baba so why was it that Zayn was suddenly trying to act as though everything were all right?  
Niall contemplated that question while he sculpted and could only come up with one answer that even remotely made sense. The families were coming and Simon soon after. Zayn was playing the part in front of the others. Unfortunately that also meant that once the others were gone Zayn would go away again. Niall didn’t want to be used like that, he was sick of being used, it had happened all his life and he wasn’t going to let it happen again not here not where he was supposed to be able to be safe. No Niall wasn’t going to let Zayn use him.

While Niall was off in his nursery the rest of the boys were excitedly awaiting their families. They didn’t have long to wait either; the doorbell rang thirty seconds after they all finished cleaning the kitchen.   
“Mum! Dad!” Louis yelled upon seeing his folks.  
“Louis!” Jay and Mark exclaimed in excitement. As they ran up to hug their son smiling.  
Similar occurrences were happening with the other three boys and their parents. Eventually everyone settled down and moved their reunion into the sitting room. That’s when they noticed that they were missing one key person.  
“Where’s Niall?” Liam asked, he wanted to introduce his parents to his baby boy properly. Sure they’d all met Niall before but not when he was the baby.  
Everyone stopped to look around the room; where was Niall? “Could he have gone upstairs?” Tricia asked.  
“Why would he be upstairs?” Louis wondered.  
Liam though could take a good guess and was mentally kicking himself for not taking the time to reassure Niall, “I’ll be back” he sighed as he made his way up to the nursery where he was almost certain his baby would be.  
“Well hurry back. I want to give him his presents” Karen said excitedly.  
Liam just nodded his head as he made his way up the stairs and down the hall. He softly knocked on Niall’s door before gently pushing it open when he received no reply. He saw his baby sitting at the crafts table working with clay, moving a little closer revealed that Niall was making a sculpture of the two of them together. Liam barely held in his astonishment. The sculpture was Liam holding Niall in his arms while the boy rested his head on Liam’s shoulder.   
“That’s amazing love” Liam commented when he was sure that neither of Niall’s hands were touching the sculpture lest he jerk and mess something up.  
Niall whipped around in shock, “Did you need something?”  
Liam had a sad smile on his lips as he picked up his baby, “Just came to see where you’d run off to”  
Niall scrunched up his face in confusion until he realized that Liam probably just wanted to know where he’d be until the families left, “I won’t leave the room, don’t worry” he assured.  
Liam just shook his head and laid Niall out on the changing table to check him, “That’s not what I meant. Everyone’s waiting for you downstairs”  
“They don’t need to” Niall shook his head, “You all enjoy yourselves”  
Sighing Liam finished changing Niall before clipping a dummy to his top before picking him up and heading for the door. “Everyone wants to see you love. They’re all excited to spend time with their new grandbaby”  
Niall didn’t understand. Why would anyone be excited to see him? However before he had time to respond there was a series of excited squeals coming from the sitting room. Jerking his head around Niall was stunned, and a bit scared, to see four eager women rushing towards him.  
“Oh just look at him” Trisha gushed.  
“He’s adorable” Anne said.  
“He’s so cute” Karen squealed.  
“He’s perfect” Jay added.  
Liam could feel Niall tensing in his arms so he extricated the two of them from the circle of ladies and sat down on the couch, rearranging the little one so that he was sitting sideways on Liam’s lap and getting his back rubbed.  
Niall was thoroughly embarrassed. It was one thing to be the baby around the boys or Simon or Paul, they all knew about this – and forced it. But around the families? He had met all of these people before and he respected them and yet here they were cooing over him while he was sitting there in a nappy, shorts, stitch t-shirt with a dummy clipped to it and stitch in his arms on his Mummy’s lap. Oh could things get any worse?  
“Do you want your dummy love?” Liam asked pressing said item to Niall’s lips. Niall just blushed red but didn’t have much of a choice as the object was being pushed in.  
Seeing Niall with a dummy bobbing in-between his lips just caused all eight parents to coo. Hearing the coos Niall turned to face his Mummy’s chest, pressed his ear against the heartbeat and scrunched his eyes shut. That didn’t help.  
Everyone sat around talking for a while. Mostly it was gushing over how cute Niall was and discussing how the boy was doing, and of course informing the others that Louis and Harry were now Papa and Baba. Naturally the very night they’d been given those names both boys had called their parents to tell them however the Liam’s and Zayn’s parents still knew nothing about it.  
“So if Zayn’s Daddy, Louis’ Papa and Harry’s Baba then why are you Mummy?” Karen asked.  
“Safe” Niall piped up coming into the conversation for the first time in over three hours.  
“Safe?” Yaser asked curiously.  
“Mummy’s are safe” Niall reiterated.  
Everyone stayed silent for a moment, wondering if Niall would go on but the boy merely returned to his original position. Liam held a triumphant smile on his face while he continued to hold his baby boy.  
“Yes, Liam is the ‘safe’ one” Harry said.  
“Bit too safe at times” Louis added.  
“Well excuse me for wanting my baby to be healthy and happy” Liam replied.  
“Yes however you don’t need to accomplish it by wrapping him in a plastic bubble” Zayn said.  
“I do not!” Liam defended himself.  
Niall snorted at that; his Mummy was psychotically over protective. This garnered a laugh from everyone in the room except for Liam who just wrapped his arms tighter around his little one and placed a kiss to the top of Niall’s head.  
Eventually everyone was talked out and Karen pulled out a bag from her suitcase, “Present time!” she squealed.  
Everyone smiled and the other mother’s gathered their bags as well before circling themselves around the baby.  
Liam patted Niall’s back some, encouraging the boy to look up, “Want to see your presents love?”  
Niall looked up at his Mummy curiously, “presents?”  
“That’s right baby boy” Liam smiled. He sat Niall up so that the lad’s back was against his chest however that’s when he noticed something, “We’ll be right back” Liam said standing with Niall in his arms.  
Karen watched as Liam walked away and got up to follow. She wanted to know what was going on. Once she got to the nursery however she understood, it was silly, she should have known.  
“Almost done love” Liam assured the one on the changing table. He was just about to close the nappy when Karen made her presence known.  
“Now surely you’re not going to close that without first putting powder on?” Karen asked walking over to the table.  
Niall flushed a deep red at Karen’s presence – he was in the middle of a nappy change! He grabbed stitch tighter and pressed it over his face trying his best to hide from whatever embarrassment he could.  
“What do you mean?” Liam asked as he started to rub Niall’s knee, sensing his nervousness.  
Karen just shook her head and pushed her son to the side, “You just comfort your little one and let me handle this” she said as she reached down to find the baby powder. She found a lone bottle tucked away at the back.  
“Now, you should use baby powder if your little one is known to get a diaper rash, like this one” she cooed at Niall reaching out to tickle his stomach a little which caused the lad to squirm.  
Karen took Niall’s ankle’s into her hand and lifted him up before sprinkling the powder. Niall squirmed, trying to get away from the odd sensation. The powder felt strange against his skin and he wasn’t sure that he liked it and then the worst part came.  
“Once it’s on you need to make sure to rub out any lumps” Karen said as she started doing just that.  
Liam had to help hold Niall still so that he didn’t roll off of the table. “So this will help to keep him from getting a rash?”  
“Well it won’t stop them altogether. If you delay in changing him for too long he’ll still get one. However Niall seems to get rashes rather regularly and this will help in reducing that amount and their severity” Karen said as she finished up and closed the nappy before pulling up the shorts.  
“I didn’t know that” Liam said as he picked up his baby and started heading back down to the living room.  
“That’s OK honey” Karen said, “It’s all a learning experience”  
“Well I’ll have to try that more” Liam agreed.  
“No” Niall complained. He hadn’t liked the powder being put on him – especially not by Karen.  
“Look whose back!” Jay cheered as they entered the room and sat back down on the couch.  
“Present time” Geoff said bringing the first bag over.  
Niall’s face was still beet red however that did not remove his curiosity and he turned to look at what these presents might be. As he took in the massive pile of gifts that had been placed on the floor in the middle of the circle. He was placed down on the floor in front of his Mummy.  
“Go on love” Liam encouraged.  
Niall looked back at his Mummy slightly confused, “What about all of you?”  
Harry chuckled a little, “They’re all for you”  
“Me?” Niall asked.  
“All of these are for you baby” Zayn said.  
Niall looked back at the massive pile of presents, there were at least twenty boxes here. He’d never had that many gifts before. In truth he’d never even received a gift until he was in one direction and then it would be all the boys and their families sending joint gifts which meant he got four gifts every Christmas and birthday. He’d thought that four was a lot now he was looking at twenty. No, this had to be a mistake, “No”  
Liam shut his eyes for a minute, he was starting to get a bad feeling, “Love,” Niall turned to his Mummy and Liam waited until he had the boy’s full attention before asking, “I know that you aren’t used to having so much attention or so much family or receiving a lot of presents” or any presents if Liam was accurate, “but everyone’s just so excited about you being our baby that they wanted to get you some presents”  
“You’re my first grandchild and I’m excited” Karen added on. She and Liam had talked in length about Niall, she and her husband were the only people her son had told about what Niall had said in the woods.  
“We’re so happy buddy, and we just wanted to say welcome to the family” Geoff said, “Like a little party”  
“Party?” Niall asked.  
“Yes. A party” Liam agreed.  
Niall smiled at this. Party meant, “cake!”  
“What?” everyone asked.  
“Party equals cake” Niall stated matter-of-factly.  
Harry chuckled, “I’ll make a cake”  
“I wanna help” Niall insisted.  
“Well of course, we can’t make a cake without our assistant” Louis agreed.  
“Yay!” Niall cheered as he started to stand up.  
Liam grabbed his baby and sat him back down, “Presents first” he instructed.  
“Oh” Niall said having completely forgotten about the presents.  
Niall was hesitant at first however once he got the first couple open he became rather excited. In the end it only took thirty minutes before Niall was sitting beside a mound of new toys – not that he really needed any but he wasn’t about to turn them down either. There were baby toys such as a mini piano or a little music set that even came with cymbals (all four older boys could already imagine the headaches they were going to get from that lovely gift – thank you Anne). However there were also some toys made for older kids such as a plastic building set, and etch-a-sketch and of course lots and lots of Legos.  
After all the presents were opened, thank yous given and trash cleaned up Louis and Harry carried Niall into the kitchen to bake a cake. At first the three were let alone to work however after half an hour Tricia and Jay headed into the kitchen, just to check on them nothing more. They found a massive mess. Somehow the boys had managed to get flour, egg, and sugar all over the floor and counter tops and Niall was currently sitting on the counter in the middle of the mess with hands covered in chocolate syrup.  
“What happened in here?” Jay asked in shock.  
Louis and Harry whipped around while Niall sat licking his fingers.  
“Huh” Louis huff laughed, “We may have gotten a little side tracked when Mr. ball of energy took the chocolate syrup out of the fridge over the eggs”  
“Uh huh” Tricia nodded walking over towards the baby. “And how’s the cake coming?”  
“We might not have started on that just yet” Harry admitted.  
“Ok” Jay said taking charge, “here’s what’s going to happen. Louis and Harry, you two are going to clean this place up. Tricia why don’t you take Niall out to Liam so that he can get a bath. Then once this kitchen is spotless the four of us” she gestured to herself, Tricia, Louis and Harry, “Will bake a cake while the little one naps.  
Louis and Harry were not excited at the prospect of cleaning up the kitchen however it was their mess and thus their responsibility. Niall however didn’t want to be left out – he’d been having fun!  
“No” Niall said squirming in Tricia’s hold.  
“Niall hold still now” Tricia instructed as she carried the lad out to the sitting room.  
“No” Niall repeated.  
“What happened to you?” Liam asked coming over to take the boy before Tricia accidentally dropped him.  
“His Papa and Baba let him get ahold of the chocolate syrup” Tricia informed Liam, “I’d say he needs a bath”  
“Agreed” Liam laughed as he started to carry his baby upstairs.  
“I’ll help” Zayn offered as he too followed the messy baby up the stairs.  
“No” Niall argued not at all wanting to leave the kitchen let alone take a bath. Niall’s arguments were ignored however as he was stripped and bathed in record time – having refused to play with his bath toys because he didn’t want a bath thank you very much.  
After his bath Niall was given a bottle of warm milk and rocked to sleep in his Mummy’s arms. Once Niall was out Liam swaddled him and placed him in his cot making sure that the night-light was now working before turning off the lights and leaving the room.


	41. Grandfathers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As tough as this may be for some of you to hear, this is the end of my story. I had extra time on my hands - finished my school work early after over three days of constant studying - and typed this up. To me it seems like a good place to stop. Thank you all for your time and support I have loved opening up this page to find new comments. Enjoy.

When Niall was thirteen his father’s father, his grandfather, came in for a visit. Niall had never met the man before, yes he’d come over to visit before but Niall had always been shoved off the property and told not to come around for a few days. This time was different though.  
Niall’s grandfather – Will, had come over for a surprise visit and it just so happened that his father and his brother were out of the house at the moment. Will had been banging on the door for a solid fifteen minutes before he came around back and took the door off the shed that Niall called home.  
Will had grabbed Niall by the hair and dragged him over to the back door of the house, “Open it up you little shit” he had sneered.  
Niall had the door opened quickly – picking a lock wasn’t exactly hard. Once the door was open Will had then brought (dragged) Niall along with him into the kitchen.  
“Fetch me a beer” he’d ordered finally letting go of Niall’s hair and dropping the boy to the floor.  
Niall ran to retrieve the requested item from the back of the fridge and popped it open before setting it on the table next to Will. Will had proceeded to drink a total of three beers before he pulled out a revolver and a single bullet. Niall hadn’t been allowed to leave and once he saw the gun he was getting a bit nervous. He didn’t know Will but from the looks of things the man was no better than any other member of his ‘family’.  
Will opened the gun and put the bullet into one of the slots before spinning it and snapping it shut – never taking his eyes off Niall the entire time. “Do you know what Russian Roulette is?” Will asked calmly, as though he were merely asking what the weather was.  
Niall could feel himself shaking as he stared at the gun.  
“Answer me boy!” Will demanded slamming the butt of the gun on the table. The gun went off from the force and Niall jumped. “Well,” Will smiled, “One down”  
Niall was petrified. There were only six chambers in that gun and one had already gone off that left approximately a twenty percent chance that he would be shot with the next one.  
Will smiled as he stood up and brought the gun to Niall’s forehead. “Ready?” he asked.  
The gun went off again and Niall could barely keep his legs under him when he realized that it was another empty chamber.  
“Two down” Will smirked.  
This went on two more times before Niall just couldn’t take it anymore and he fell. Just as Niall was falling the gun went off again and this time it wasn’t an empty chamber. The bullet ended up grazing the side of Niall’s head right behind the top of his left ear. There was still a scar there today.  
“Damn piece of shit” Will had sneered as he stalked out of the kitchen.  
Niall had laid there for another few minutes getting his bearings before he got up and ran. His father had always said that he was free to leave whenever he wanted, that there was nothing keeping him here. Up until this point Niall had thought the shed safer than the streets – now he didn’t.  
Seventeen days later Niall found his way to Dublin and spent the next three years there before he tried out for x factor.

Harry and Louis were in the kitchen with Trisha and Jay finishing off the cake and Liam and Zayn were in the living room with the rest of the families. Everything was going nicely until they all heard a blood-curdling scream from upstairs. Instantly all four boys were sprinting up the stairs; they’d never heard Niall scream like that before.  
Louis was the first one through the door and to Niall’s cot, “Oh baby what’s wrong?” he asked as he scooped Niall up. The lad having wriggled out of the blanket he’d been swaddled in sometime during his nightmare.  
Niall had awoken himself with his own scream and had started bawling immediately after. There was a strange pain in his stomach and he didn’t know where it was coming from. He wasn’t sick.  
“What’s wrong buddy?” Harry asked concerned.  
“Are you OK Ni?” Zayn questioned.  
“Did you have a nightmare love?” Liam asked softly, cupping Niall’s face.  
“Mummy” Niall whimpered out.  
In seconds Liam had his baby in his arms, “It’s ok baby, Mummy’s got you” he cooed.  
Niall didn’t answer just kept crying and hiccupping. The pain in his chest wasn’t letting up and he didn’t know why.  
“Is something wrong love? You nappy wet?” Liam asked as he laid the boy on the changing table. The three other men were gathered around the table trying to soothe the crying lad.  
Liam took off the soiled nappy and was about to put on the powder when Niall started to squirm.  
“N...n…no…no” the boy stuttered out. The stupid pain in his stomach just wouldn’t let up. He unconsciously gripped his stomach which of course didn’t go unnoticed.  
“Are you not feeling well love?” Liam asked as he put down the powder and started to get out the thermometer.  
Niall watched what his Mummy was doing with tear filled eyes. He didn’t want his temperature taken! “N… n… no” he begged.  
“Shhh. It’s alright baby” Zayn tried to sooth as he gently flipped the boy over, “It’ll be alright and you’ll get a bottle of soda after” he bribed.  
“Really?” Liam mouthed angrily to Zayn as he slid the thermometer in.  
Niall just laid there and cried as the evil thermometer made its way into him. He rally hated having the cold, slick object in him, it just felt wrong. There was nothing he could do though; mummy thought he was sick.  
Liam took the thermometer out and sighed in relief when it came back normal. Still, if his baby wasn’t sick then why was he holding his stomach and crying? He turned Niall over and finished powdering the boy and putting on the nappy.  
“You did so good baby” Zayn cooed, “What kind of soda do you want huh?”  
Liam rolled his eyes as he picked his baby up and started heading out of the room.  
“R…roo…root” Niall started.  
“Rootbeer?” Zayn asked.  
Niall just shook his head in answer and kept crying.  
“How is he?” Anne asked worriedly.  
“He keeps crying and he’s holding his stomach” Harry started rambling, “His temperatures fine though and we don’t know what’s wrong”  
All the parents shared a knowing look and Karen stepped forward gesturing for Liam to give her the baby. Liam was confused but handed Niall over anyway – if it would help his baby then he’d do anything.  
“It’s alright little one” Karen cooed as she placed a towel on her shoulder before lifting Niall in her arms so his head was on the towel. She started to gently pat Niall’s back as she bounced him around. “I’m guessing that you fed him a bottle before you put him down for his nap?”  
“Yeah” Zayn shrugged, “We always do”  
“And did he drink it quickly?” Jay asked while Karen continued to pat Niall’s back and bounce him around.  
“Yes…” Liam asked confused as to where this was leading.  
Suddenly a large burp came from Niall along with a bit of spit up. After he burped Niall’s stomach felt so much better and he finally stopped crying. “Sorry” he apologized fully embarrassed.  
“He had gas?” Liam asked finally getting it.  
Karen smiled, “When a baby drinks too fast they can get a lot of air in their stomachs. If he ever drinks too quickly it would be a good idea to burp him”  
All the boys sighed in relief as Liam took his baby back and sat down with Niall on the couch. Niall was blushing furiously, completely embarrassed as to what he had just done. He couldn’t believe he’d just been burped and then spit up on Karen’s shoulder like a baby. This was just becoming too much.  
“Here we go baby boy,” Zayn said happily coming into the room with a bottle or rootbeer.  
Niall perked up when he saw the bottle and started reaching for it. “Use your words baby” Liam instructed. He noted that Niall had become rather quiet since the families had arrived. He knew that silence was one of Niall’s coping skills, something that makes him feel safer, he just wished that his boy didn’t feel the need to close himself off.  
Niall looked up at his mummy pleadingly but Liam wasn’t letting up, “Please?” he asked hoping that would be enough.  
Everyone smiled and Zayn took Niall into his arms. Niall was uncertain about being given to Zayn but the man was the one with the rootbeer and he could always go back to mummy after he was done.  
“Slow down baby” Zayn instructed as he lowered the bottle, he did not want to cause his baby any more pain.  
Harry went to the kitchen to get the cake out of the oven and the rest of the families talked while Niall drank his soda, agonizingly slow. Despite his multiple attempts to coax more out of the bottle than what Zayn was allowing, Niall never proved to be successful however he did manage to finish it eventually. Niall let out a small whine when his bottle emptied, he didn’t want it to be empty, he liked his soda and he rarely got any – the soda was the only good part about getting his temperature taken.  
“You all done there?” Zayn asked as he took the bottle away and brought Niall up to his shoulder and started patting.  
Niall squirmed in Zayn’s hold but; embarrassingly, he did end up burping. His cheeks were flaming but thankfully he didn’t spit up this time. As soon as Niall was lowered down he reached his hands out towards his mummy trying to get across the hint that he wanted to be picked up.  
Liam saw his baby but he really wanted to encourage speaking – silence and gestures was not an appropriate way for Niall to communicate, he was smart and needed to use his words.  
Niall whined in Zayn’s hold but mummy still wasn’t moving. Eventually he started to cry out of frustration. “You need to use your words baby” Zayn whispered in his ear.  
Niall looked to Zayn before turning back to Liam, “Mummy” he whimpered.  
Instantly Liam had his baby in his lap and was softly cooing at him and rubbing his back. “That was so good love” he praised, “You spoke so nicely”  
Niall ignored the praise and turned to press his face into his mummy’s chest searching out his heartbeat. Once Niall had found what he was looking for he sighed and started trying to wrap his arms around stitch, that’s when he realized that he didn’t have his friend – he’d left him behind!  
Liam noticed Niall tense up and start squirming, “What is it love?”  
“Stitch” Niall answered quietly.  
“I’ll get him” Louis volunteered as he started up the stairs two at a time.  
“Grab a dummy too would you” Liam called after him as he stopped Niall from sticking his thumb in his mouth.  
In no time at all Louis was back downstairs with not only the requested items but the stitch blanket as well. Niall was quick to take his stuffed friend from his Papa and clutch stitch to his chest. Liam pressed the dummy into Niall’s mouth and then wrapped the boy up in the blanket so he’d be nice and warm.  
“The cake’s out of the oven but it needs to cool before I can ice it” Harry informed coming back into the room.  
“Making chocolate icing right?” Zayn asked as he headed towards the kitchen.  
“Oh, I’ll help you make the icing” Louis volunteered.  
All the mothers just shook their heads and got up to go and supervise the three boys. They didn’t trust them alone with all that chocolate; not after earlier.  
Liam chuckled as he started to stand up, “I’ve got to go, I’ll be back” he said as he started to hand Niall over to Geoff. Niall clung to Liam though, refusing to let go. “Love, can you go to grandpa Geoff please?” Liam asked as he started trying to hand him off again.  
“No please” Niall pleaded with tears running down his face.  
Liam sighed, there was no way he could tell his baby no, not when he was this upset. “Alright then, you’ll just come with me then”  
Niall wrapped his arms around his mummy’s neck, “Thank you mummy, thank you”  
Liam was confused but didn’t think the best time to discuss it was while they were in a room full of people Niall didn’t really trust. Liam was relieved when Niall allowed himself to be placed in the playpen in Liam’s room while Liam himself used the in-suite restroom. Once he was done he washed his hands and then took his baby over to the couch in his room and sat down with Niall turned so they could look at each other. “Want to tell me what’s wrong?”  
Niall gulped, he didn’t want to tell anyone what was wrong. He brought stitch closer to himself and stared at his mummy for a long time debating. As much as he hated to admit it he did feel better after he’d told mummy all those things in the woods, it was almost as though a little weight had been lifted. If he were to tell anyone his secrets it would be his mummy. But he didn’t want to put all that weight on his mummy, that wouldn’t be fair. “Can’t”  
“Why can’t you love?” Liam asked patiently. He knew this was hard for Niall and he needed to let the boy come to him at his own pace.  
“It’d hurt you”  
“Hurt me?”  
Niall nodded his head, “Don’t want to hurt you”  
Liam smiled a little at that, it was so sweet, “You won’t hurt me love”  
“You’ll be sad. Like before”  
“Before?” Liam asked confused.  
“You cried before”  
“You mean in the woods?”  
Again Niall nodded, “I don’t want you to be sad”  
“Oh love” Liam hugged Niall to him, “I might have been sad but I was so happy that you told me, that you trusted me. I was happy that you let some of that go”  
“Don’t want to hurt you” Niall repeated.  
“Love, look at me” Liam waited Niall out and eventually Niall did look Liam in the eye, “No matter what you say, no matter how sad I get, you will not hurt me. I promise you everything will be alright”  
Niall bit his bottom lip; debating. Should he tell mummy? He didn’t want to hurt his mummy but he did want to tell him. Eventually Niall sighed, “My… ‘fathers’ father. My grandfather I guess. His name was Will. He wasn’t a very nice man” Niall paused, collecting himself, “I had never met him before but he came by once and no one else was there. He drug me to the kitchen. He got a bit drunk. He had a gun” Niall started crying and buried himself in his mummy while playing with his left ear subconsciously running his fingers over the scar.  
Liam couldn’t believe what he was hearing. He’d never known Niall had met any of his biological grandparents – he didn’t think that there would be an issue but now he was starting to understand why Niall hadn’t wanted to be left with all of his new grandpas. He watched Niall fiddle with his ear again and couldn’t help but look to see if something was bothering him, maybe the lad had an ear infection? As Liam looked over the ear he didn’t find anything. Just out of curiosity he looked behind Niall’s ear and gasped at what he saw. It didn’t take a genius to put two and two together, Will had a gun and Niall had a scar. “Oh love”  
“I have Russian Roulette” Niall cried.  
OK, Liam hadn’t expected that one. It just made things so much worse in his mind. Not only was Niall shot at once but multiple times. Could those people have been anymore heartless? “What happened after love?” he asked, he just had to know.  
“I left” Niall answered.  
“And…” Liam hesitated, he didn’t want to press Niall into answering but he’s wanted to know for a while now, “how old were you?”  
“Thirteen” Niall said shakily.  
Liam just crushed Niall to his chest, refusing to let go. Who the hell did that to a kid?! How did Niall survive this? As much as Liam wanted to know the answers he wasn’t about to ask the boy in his arms.  
“I hurt you” Niall whimpered suddenly.  
“No” Liam insisted, “No love, you didn’t hurt me”  
“You’re crying”  
“I’m just sad love” Liam assured, “I’m not hurt. I promise”  
Niall just cried more and curled up into his mummy’s chest, ear over heartbeat. He started to slip his thumb into his mouth when he suddenly felt plastic against his lips and accepted the dummy instead. Lastly he made sure that Stitch was in his arms before clutching onto his mummy’s arms to ensure that the man didn’t let go – not that Niall thought he would but still, better safe than sorry. Liam couldn’t help but chuckle when Niall grasped his arms and pulled them tighter around the small body, his baby could be adorable at times.  
They sat like that for who knows how long, just comforting each other. Eventually though Karen knocked softly on the door before popping her head in, “Everything alright?”  
Liam looked at his mum and smiled, “Yeah” he rasped out his voice a little hoarse from unused.  
Karen gave her son a knowing look before smiling again, “The cakes done”  
Niall looked over to Karen at that, “Cake?” he asked softly.  
Liam and Karen chuckled at the little one – he was so cute! “Cake it is” Liam said standing up with Niall in one arm and wiping his face with the other. “Let’s eat”  
Niall was placed in his highchair as the others all took seats around the dining table, the kitchen having proved to be too small for all of them to fit. Harry happily brought over a plate of cake for himself and one for his baby while Louis tied a pale blue bib stating ‘Mummy’s Boy’ around Niall’s neck.  
Niall blushed at this, especially being that he was in front of all the families. His embarrassment wasn’t eased when Harry brought a forkful of cake up to his mouth; “Open up baby”  
Despite his embarrassment Niall loved the cake, “Thank you Baba”  
Harry beamed, he loved hearing Niall call him Baba, it just made his day, “I’m happy you liked it baby”  
Everyone happily sat and ate their cake and talked. Niall had put on a small tantrum until he’d been taken out of his chair and placed on his Papa’s lap. Eventually though the others started to take notice of the way he kept rubbing at his eyes and trying to stifle a yawn.  
“Well I think it’s time for someone to go to bed” Liam stated standing up and taking his baby from Louis.  
“No” Niall complained but he didn’t struggle knowing it would do no good; he was too tired to put up much of a fight anyways.  
“Do you mind if I help?” Karen asked following along.  
“Not at all” Liam smiled as Niall just buried his head in his mummy’s shoulder.  
As Liam undressed Niall and started to change his nappy Karen looked through the drawers before pulling something out and heading over to the changing table. “So how’s the swaddling going?”  
Liam sighed, “It was working but he managed to untangle himself during his nap, or maybe it was during his nightmare?”  
“Well why don’t you try this?” Karen offered holding out the clothing item she’d found.  
Liam took the offered item. It was… a pouch with a hole for a head and then it sipped up the front. “What is it?”  
“It’s a sleeper that will make him feel as though he’s being swaddled but he won’t be able to get out of it” Karen explained.  
“No” Niall stated firmly.  
Liam decided to give it a try, what could it hurt? With Karen’s help they were able to get a struggling Niall into the sleeper – with Stitch of course – and sure enough it was exactly what Karen had said. Niall could still move around inside of it but only so much and he wouldn’t be able to get out. It provided the safety and comfort of being swaddled without the ability to loosen it in the middle of the night and cause nightmares.  
Once Niall was settled he was fed a bottle and then, much to his displeasure, burped before he was tucked into bed for the night with the mobile running and the night light on. It didn’t take long before he was out for the count.  
As soon as the nursery door was shut Liam turned around to find both his parents standing there, “Now, want to tell us what happened?” Geoff asked softly as he led his family into Liam’s room.  
As soon as the door was shut and they had privacy Liam started sobbing. It took an hour and a half for Liam to tell his parents everything and by the time he was done all three of them had tears on leaking out their eyes.  
“There is one good thing I can say about this” Geoff said. Liam and Karen both gave the man a curious and unbelievable look, “He’s opening up to you”  
Liam smiled and nodded, “Yeah that he is”  
And it was true. Niall was opening up, coming around. It would take a lot of time and pain but everyone was willing to put forth the effort because they knew the end results would be well worth it.


End file.
